Meeting the Marauders
by PoppyPotter
Summary: Or how Mr Evans was forced to spend Christmas with four raving lunatics, had his life turned upside down and was forced to make his precious daughter go on a date.
1. Prologue

Meeting the Marauders

_Or how Mr Evans was forced to spend Christmas with four raving lunatics, had his life turned upside down and was forced to make his precious daughter go on a date._

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><p><strong>Prologue<strong>

Every fathers pride and joy is their children and for Mr Evans of 64 Mills Crescent it was no different. He loved his daughters more than anything in the world. Even (miraculously) more than football or treacle tart. Before he became a father life had been simple, very simple. He lived a happy life with his wife. He woke up every day at the crack of dawn, ate his breakfast (preferably bacon on toast), walked past the old mills, down Spinners End (the bad side of town), and then finally after a turn by the old church he would reach his garage. He was a mechanic and he loved it- cars were his passion. Every day he would come home and enjoy the evening with his wife; whether gardening or merely watching T.V- anytime spent together was heaven.

Mr Evans had minimum worries.

Then she got _pregnant._ And suddenly life changed; he needed to pay for baby clothes, and baby food, and baby nappies and then just when he thought _Whew!_ Petunia's starting school, she was pregnant again and so he had to go and buy baby food and baby nappies and baby everything again. Not that he was complaining- he loved his daughters, loved coming home to them, picking them up from school… twirling them in the air.

He loved watching them grow up.

The one thing he dreaded however, more than anything, was the day his daughters would go from girls to _women_. The day when boys were not things to run away from. The thought had made him shudder. He had been sitting at his nieces wedding when he first realised that he would one day have to take his daughters down the aisle; as his niece opened her mouth to say _I do_ he suddenly thought _I remember her as a baby_, then _my Gosh time's gone fast_, then looking at his daughters he thought _one day that'll be them_. And since that day he had feared, above all else, the day he would have to admit his little girls were not his little girls anymore…

Unfortunately for Mr Evans that time had now come; his daughters though not getting married, were now closer to womanhood than childhood and the thought sent a chill down his spine -which was why on one cold winter's afternoon he stood pacing his living room floor. He could not for the life of him seem to stand still. Not that he blamed himself; any father would be pacing just as he was; _up down, up down_. If his wife had still been alive she would give him "the look" and he would sit. She wasn't here however and so he had to carry the burden himself, hence the pacing; _up down, up down._

His elder daughter, you see, was dating a certain Vernon Dursley. Vernon was rich, obnoxious and _very_ boring. And yet after the previous days meeting with the boy and his daughter it seemed that one of these days he would indeed, be destined to get a walrus for a son-in-law.

And there was nothing he could do about it.

He shook his head at the memory of Dursley stretching across the table for a fifth piece of chicken, whilst telling him about his company; Grunnings. He shuddered then when he remembered the "loving" look his daughter had given her boyfriend.

He wished there was something he could do to make her see that Vernon Dursley was not someone she should be considering to spend the rest of her life with. But… he couldn't, because as much as he might have hated to admit it the Whale made her happy, and ask any father and he'd tell you that was the only thing he wanted for his daughters; happiness.

So if it meant he had to smile at bad jokes about Brazilian golfers and show interest in drills, he would. He would also however dread the day when Vernon bloody Dursley decided to ask for his daughters hand in marriage. Until then however, he would hold the belief that Petunia would grow to see sense. After all, one could hope.

Glancing at the time Mr Evans resumed his pacing, only this time thinking about his younger daughter. _Thank god,_ she didn't have a boyfriend yet, well…at least he hoped she didn't. She _had _been mentioning that James Potter a lot in her letters home but…that was not altogether surprising. After all, James Potter had featured in nearly every one of his daughters letters home from her first year, no what was surprising was, instead of _"he's an arrogant, obnoxious, big headed..."_ or "_I can't believe Potter would dare…"_ her letters were now filled with sentences beginning _James and I this and James and I that._

It was driving him mad.

When he had asked his daughter if there was something between her and this James Potter fellow she had said he was mad and assured him James Potter was merely her fellow head and a close friend.

That hadn't stopped him wondering just how "close" they were.

Nevertheless, Lily had yet to bring home a boyfriend for him to wring out which could only mean she wasn't serious about any one as yet. A thought that made him want to jump in joy- like any father he would prefer it if his daughters were locked firmly away from those "animals" called boys. He knew what they were like (he had been one after all) and he thought he would get much more sleep if they were kept far away from his precious daughters. Perhaps he should consider sending Lily to Christian convent? The thought of Lily's reaction to being sent to a convent however, quickly dispelled this thought. Lily could breathe fire if she was angry. Oh well, he thought, hopefully that fire is enough to keep boys away.

Regrettably for Mr Evans, Lily may not have been bringing a boyfriend home for Christmas but she was bringing a boy, in fact four boy-friends or perhaps it would be better for his nerves to say _four friends who happened to be of the male species_. Yes, that was better, much better. In fact he thought pausing his pacing, perhaps he should see this as a positive thing- at least he would get to meet these friends, assess who was dangerous to his precious daughter, make it clear to them how close to his daughter they could get and then let them leave happy in the knowledge that they really were just friends.

Yes, that was the plan. Give the boys a friendly heart attack; let them help him keep his baby girl boyfriend-less for as long as possible.

He rubbed his hands together excitedly, a smile on his face for the first time in hours. In the back of his mind he could see his late wife shaking her head at him; ignoring the image he went to the kitchen; he thought he deserved a beer after that brain wave.

Unknown to the gleeful Mr Evans the boys coming were known as the Marauders, four boys known to _give_ people heart attacks not have them themselves. Nor did he know that in a few short hours it would be them giving him the orders and he would be forced to partake in a plan to make his single daughter go on a date…

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><p>AN-I hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it. If you did please review and if you didn't still review- let me know how to improve it! Next chapter should be up tomorrow (hopefully).


	2. First Impressions

**Typos fixed :)- 14/03/12**

**First Impressions**

_**Or the time Mr Evans decided James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew were the last people he would ever wish to spend time with (or let his daughter consort with)**_

Mr Evans was sitting quite comfortably on his sofa watching the _Antiques Roadshow_- it really was quite remarkable, he thought, how some seemingly worthless objects could be worth thousands. The presenter was just about to tell one man how much his old copper cups were worth, a smirk on his face when… _Ding Dong! Ding Dong!_

It was the doorbell.

Grumbling Mr Evans stood up and glanced at the time; two minutes and fifteen seconds late. He harrumphed. Kids these days he thought; _punctuality means nothing to them_.

_Ding Dong! Ding Dong!_

"I'm coming. I'm coming!" Apparently they didn't have much patience either- _humph!_ See, he was right! Boys these days, they couldn't wait.

For _anything._

Taking his time to the door he listened to the laughter; loud and roguish. It sounded like a mob out there. Bracing himself and hoping his daughter had indeed told the truth about not having a ... _Significant other _he opened the door.

Lily practically jumped on him; "Dad!" she cried hugging him. He smiled at his little girl. "Hey Princess, I've missed you" she beamed up at him and he ruffled her hair, before turning to the four boys standing on his door step.

His mouth dropped open.

It wasn't what they were wearing because they were in fact wearing _normal_ clothes and yet they seemed to radiate ... Strangeness or was it mischief? Perhaps, he thought, it was because they were such an _odd_ group of friends.

Mismatched, was the word he would use. It was as though someone had picked up four random strangers, and just dumped them together. Rather haphazardly too by the looks of it; they were a mix of arms and legs and heads and were pushing each other as though to get in the front.

Mr Evans was most shocked that his dear daughter could have _such_ hooligans as friends!

The shortest one (who had just managed to push his way to the front) was plump with blond hair and blue eyes. He was wringing his hands in a nervous way that made Mr Evans frown in suspicion_; hmm, surely this bumbling boy couldn't be Lilys choice of boyfriend? _But then, why oh why, did the boy look as though he was just about to meet his doom? He was acting just the way and (Mr Evans hated to admit it even to himself) that he had acted when he had met his own father-in-law for the first time.

"This is Peter, dad" said Lily smiling and realisation dawned. _Ah yes_, he thought remembering Lilys' last letter; _"I feel poor Peter so sorry- his date with Mary was an absolute disaster! It wasn't his fault. He just gets nervous and then, well, disaster strikes..." _So this was the poor boy that was always so clumsy.

Mr Evans could have skipped; his daughter wasn't dating a pudgy potato after all! And with this thought he gave the boy a small smile- _he _certainly seemed to be no danger "Come in Peter" he said warmly. Peter nodded before tripping over his own feet. There was a snort, and a _"Merlin peter! That's the third time today!"_

Mr Evans turned his head sharply and looked at the other boys; there they were standing, so confident, so cocky, so…_male_.

One of them (with hair far too sandy for Mr Evans liking) extended his hand; "Remus Lupin sir." Again Mr Evans heart soared- perhaps this visit wouldn't be so bad. He knew about this Remus, he had been Lilys friend for a while...

Her words rang in his ear; "_he's ever so kind - to be honest he's like a __brother__."_ He smiled at the boy, noting his ragged appearance; he had a scar on the side of his face and bags under his eyes. Perhaps he should take him to the medicine cupboard- heaven knows that's what his wife would do. He considered this as he shook the boys hand before coming to the conclusion that that would be _far_ too nice, and therefore not work in accordance with his plan of scaring the four boys off.

In his mind, once again, he could see an image of his dead wife looking most disapproving.

Naturally, he ignored it.

Turning to the other two boys his frown deepened. They were wearing identical smirks; "Sirius Black" said the slightly taller of the two grabbing Mr Evans hand and shaking it vigorously "I take it you are most pleased to meet me".

Mr Evans could do nothing more than stare.

With grey eyes, a handsome face and black leather jacket the boy looked just like one of those cover models of the magazines Petunia frequently left around the house.

He was a heartbreaker.

_Yes, he'd be one to watch_ thought Mr Evans shrewdly. Though, of course, he knew Lily was more intelligent than to just date _anybody_ he still thought the boy looked dangerous- in fact he thought any decent father would think so.

Lily's voice resounded in his ear; _"He's crazy, absolutely bonkers but he's a got a great heart"_

_Great heart?_ He scoffed; by the looks of it the only _great_ thing the boy had was a love for himself.

"Well, can I come in then? It's bloody freezing out here, not to mention my stomachs rumbling. Got any food Lilyflower?"

_Lily flower?_

Surely Lily wasn't dating _him! _And Lily flower? What type of nickname was that? Highly unoriginal if you asked him and Mr Evans was someone who prided himself in his originality. Ok, so maybe he did call Lily a princess, which may or may not be completely unoriginal but that was because _it was true!_ She _was _a princess- but Lily flower? _Seriously?_

He shook his head- yes, this_ Black_ was definitely one to watch.

He was, for a lack of a better word, a _bad boy_ and if the latest movies were anything to go by girls of this generation liked that sort of thing. Of course, he didn't believe his Lily fit into that category but then again how the heck was he supposed to know what went on in a girls head?

Sighing, he turned to the last boy on his doorstep;_ this_ was the one he had been waiting for. The once infamous, now somehow, loved James potter.

The boy who had been mentioned in _every _damn letter he read.

_Every. _

_Single._

_One._

He narrowed his eyes even more, scrutinising the boy.

James Potter had jet black hair that seemed to stand in every direction. It looked, thought Mr Evans, as though he'd just been electrocuted. His face was far, _far _too angular. His glasses hung lopsidedly. His smile was crooked. There was nothing, he concluded, from what he could see, that would make any sane girl like him. His arms, after all, were far too long. He was all bones and arms and legs and_, and_ the point was Mr John Evans did not like the look of him. At all.

Not one bit.

Not when he shook his hand.

Not when he said; _"It's great to finally meet you"_

Not when Lily leaned past and pulled him through door frame.

Not when Lily reached her hand out and ruffled his hair.

Not when the two of them walked to the living room _hand in hand._

Yes, it would be safe to say Mr Evans did not like James Potter one bit.

_**A/N: This chapter was supposed to be longer but I'm extremely busy at the moment so this is all I got done. Thank you so much to everyone that reviewed, or put this on their favourites/alerts, Next chapter will probably be up on Monday. Merry Christmas! And please review!**_


	3. The longest evening

**UPDATED; 27/02/12 (just fixed some typos :D)**

**The Longest Evening**

_Featuring an armchair, four raving lunatics and an arm wrestle_

Mr Evans was a man who liked his routine. Now a widow and approaching his mid-forties (yes, mid- forties _not fifties_ -thank you very much) his life was in a good way.

It wasn't always easy of course, the loss of his wife having affected him more than anyone could really see but Mr Evans was happy or at least content with his life (despite that is the many sleepless nights his daughters may have caused him)

His hair might have been steadily thinning but on the plus side he no longer had to wake at the break of dawn. Now, with no Mrs Evans to work on his conscience he woke up _much, much_ later. Meaning the garage opened _much, much_ later. Meaning costumers with cars that needed repairing had to wait till _much, much_ later. Not that they minded- Mr Evans was, you see, well known in the small town and friendly with most of its residents.

Lunch was pub grub or a fishy from Old Joeys. Work was tiring but enjoyable. He'd return home each evening to a bit of gardening, some chores and _then?_ Then he would find himself sat on the armchair.

_His_ armchair.

Worn out as it was, Mr Evans would not replace it. The armchair had after all been through so much with him.

It was the first armchair he had_ ever_ bought.

It was the armchair he sat on whilst watching Coronation St. (a guilty pleasure) or reruns of his favourite shows, or the news at ten.

It was comfortable, old, and _his._

He had sat on that sofa every night for years.

That was until his house had been invaded by four raving lunatics.

Now instead of him sitting on _his_ arm chair he had to watch Sirius _Bloody _Black lounge on it whilst he, he had to sit on an old, rickety, wooden _stool_! Which if he was being perfectly honest was giving him a right pain in the backside, not that he would move of course, or just retire to his room.

Oh no, despite the inconvenience the stool may have been causing him Mr Evans was determined to stay in that living room- it was necessary you see that he complete a full and thorough assessment of the situation.

He had to, after all, know his enemy before planning an attack.

And so it would be that on the 23rd December 1977 Mr John Evans was stuck in a room with four boys and his daughter, his eyes wide open, his ears alert.

It did not take him long to realise it was going to be a very, very long evening...

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><p><strong>Time: 6:44 pm <strong>

**Location: The hallway, 64 Mills Crescent. **

Mr Evans stood frozen in his hallway.

His mind was still reeling from the thoughts of James Electrocuted hair Potter, with his knobbly knees and crooked smile.

How dare that boy hold his daughters hand like that? And Lily? Instead of pulling away (as she should have) pulled the boy _into _the living room.

She had sworn they were only friends and yet…Mr Evans shook his head hoping against hope his daughter was not dating James Potter (or Sirius Black). Or for that matter _anybody._

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><p><strong>Time: 6:46<strong>

**Location: The living room, 64 Mills Crescent.**

Walking into his living room Mr Evans mouth dropped open. The boys it seemed had taken the pleasure of making themselves at home…

Peter Pettigrew looked most amused by an unmoving picture of Lily and was repeatedly poking it much to Mr Evans annoyance.

Remus Lupin was walking around the room with a pleasant sort of interest that Mr Evans (for no reason) mistrusted and Lily and James were both sitting together on the sofa.

Next to each other.

As in their arms practically touching.

As in an inch or less apart.

As in _far_ too close.

And then there was Sirius Bloody Black looking most comfortable on Mr Evans own armchair, his hands grabbing Mr Evans own remote control, and then as Mr Evans watched in horror he insulted the great show that was the Antiques Roadshow _(Blah! I thought you said muggles used this for entertainment Lilykins?) _before he began flicking through the channels at a ridiculous pace.

Grumbling Mr Evans sat down on the only remaining space. On the old rickety hard stool.

"Hey look it's a felly phone!"

"_Telephone_- Peter."

"Merlin- you sure the people in this thing can't see us, Lily?"

"Check this out!"

Mr Evans sighed-_what he thought had he ever done to deserve an evening like this?_

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><p><strong>Time: 7:37 pm<strong>

**Location: The living room, 64 Mills Crescent.**

It felt as though he had been sitting there for a lifetime. It had, in fact only been 51 minutes and 33 seconds.

The worst 51 minutes 33 seconds of his life.

Worse than that fight with Rose (God- she had been scary), worse than her labours (both of them had lasted over twelve hours), worse than the hour with Vernon Dursley the previous day.

Actually in hindsight, nothing could be as bad as Vernon Dursely. So maybe they weren't _that_ bad.

No, no one could say those four boys were boring.

They were, however, _four raving lunatics_- that much had been confirmed in the last 51 minutes.

Peter Pudgy Pettigrew who had done an excited jiggle when the phone had rang (it had been Old Joe) was now eating his _fifth_ piece of victoria sponge (Mr Evans favourite).

Sirius Black having had his share of muffins, treacle tart and a banana now had the remote back in his hand and was flicking through the channels at the same wild pace (attacking the buttons as though to see just how fast he could get through all the channels.)

The room, once neat and tidy now looked as though it had been ransacked thanks to the many times the occupants of the room had picked them up in amazement. The pen that had laying on the newspaper where Mr Evans had been doing a crossword earlier was examined thoroughly by James, who had along with Sirius been practically in awe of the light switch; they had spent several minutes switching it on _and_ off_ and_ on _and_ off _and _on _and _off until finally Lily watching her father's scowl deepen told them to quit it.

Needless to say Mr Evans now had a rather large headache.

He had missed the end of the antiques roads show (Christmas special), had not gotten a slice of his favourite victoria sponge ( courtesy of Peter and Sirius) and could not even sit in his favourite armchair and so now along with a grumbling stomach, he had a rather pained backside.

His daughter hadn't made things much easier either, still snuggled close to the Potter boy. Did she know, he wondered, how she was making his head spin by her ridiculous behaviour?

Mr Evans shook his head; did she really have to laugh at everything the mongoose said?

And he thought rather bitterly; did she really have to give him _all _her attention?

_Hasn't seen me in months and hardly wants to talk_ Mr Evans harrumphed to himself before noticing something that made the situation even more dire than it already was...

Lily was blushing.

You see as strange as it might be, Lily Evans despite her red hair and pale skin never blushed.

Embarrassment was simply not a part of Lily. It had been a trait Mr Evans had always admired of his younger daughter; whilst he could feel his faint heat up at small trips or embarrassing mistakes, Lily could take it all with a smile. Her inner mortification would never be seen, instead head up she could laugh at her own misfortune or if the situation demanded it, come up with witty retorts.

Blushing was just not his Lily.

Oh she went red in anger of course. In fact an angry Lily Evans could be compared to (and Mr Evans hated to admit it) a fire breathing dragon.

_God help the grandkids_ he thought as he remembered a particular nasty fight between his two daughters.

Not that he would be a grandfather for a long, long time. Lily and Petunia for that matter were both far too young to get married and…_procreate._

He scrunched his face up trying to imagine a pregnant Lily before shuddering. _Far too young._ But if he did have to imagine future grandkids then, well, they would have tufts of red hair, and beautiful almond shaped eyes, green of course, and Lilys nose and Lilys eyes and Lilys…

He stopped.

He was remembering a baby Lily. And according to the laws of nature, Lilys kids couldn't be her replicas, they would have to be part of someone else too. He shuddered again, before grimacing. He would one day have to give his daughter away- but it would be to someone special.

James Potter was _not_ special.

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><p><strong>Time: 8:04 pm<strong>

**Location: The Living Room, 64 Mills Crescent**

"Thanks for having us Mr Evans"

Starting Mr Evans turned and stared at the boy standing in front of him.

It was the sandy haired one. Lupin.

"Oh, well it's no problem" he said and then after a moments pause gruffly; "how's your mother? Only Lily mentioned you had to travel home a lot- said your mother got quite ill and _you _for that matter"

Remus shifted; "Erm …She's …she's doing much" he cleared his throat "better now"

Mr Evans nodded – he would be polite for this evening at least.

After all he couldn't exactly initiate mission _Keep Lily single_ whilst she was in the room now could he?

"So you enjoy school?"

Remus relaxed and gave a small smirk that made Mr Evans frown; "Very much sir" he said before pausing "Lily makes a brilliant head girl"

"Well of course she does!"

Remus hid a smile; "It's caused quite a lot of …Ah _misfortune_ for some of the students. Our school has seen a significant reduction in pranks this year"

"Well, I should hope so! With my Lily I bet not one of them miscreants stand a chance" Said Mr Evans proudly. _Of course Lily would make a brilliant head girl- she was his daughter was she not?_

Remus nodded; "Yeah and then with James as head boy"_ Mr Evans scowled at the reminder _"They're an unbeatable force"

"I'd say Lily was quite unbeatable herself" he said folding his arms across his chest- looking (though he was unaware of it) much like a petulant school child.

Remus did his best to hide the smirk playing at his lips; "Lily is quite a... Force to behold. James is too for that matter. But together well, no trouble maker stands a chance"

Mr Evans scowled, his dislike for Remus Lupin growing by the minute. The boy appeared determined to make it seem as though Lily, _his_ Lily needed James Potter.

Humph! With all that bones Mr Evans would be surprised if _James Potter_ could hold off a twelve year old. And then for that absurd boy to suggest Lily needed James to be unbeatable? He shook his head _Ha!_ As if. His Lily was at her best when she was _alone_.

Single.

Safer at least.

"Oi! Moony- take a look at this!" Remus gave Mr Evans a smile (which he did not return) before going to an excited looking Sirius Black.

Mr Evans watched him go, his eyes narrowing; Remus Lupin it seemed believed that James was good for Lily. Which could only mean one thing; he had become Lilys friend not out of mutual interests but so that he could slowly poison her mind into liking his friend. _Hmm yes, he had made her believe his friends were nice, were fun, were bloody great and she his poor Lily had fallen for it_.

Mr Evans rubbed his hands together; _just you wait Lupin, he thought, just you wait…  
><em>

* * *

><p><strong>Time: 8: 49 pm.<strong>

**Location: The Living room, 64 Mills Crescent**

The Marauders.

That's what he learned they called themselves.

_The Marauders. _A ridiculous name if you asked him.

"So, you're a sort of club are you?" He had asked, only to be met by indignation. Even Lily had shaken her head with laughter.

_"No!"_ They had all cried. Far too dramatically for his liking but then again it seemed everything the Marauders did had to be _over the top_. When they told a story they acted out their favourite moments. When they laughed it was loud and boisterous. When they spoke, they practically scream, bouncing in excitement.

And for the life of him Mr Evans could not fathom why or in fact _how?_ He wondered if they had consumed too many additives or if they all had a pair of batteries stuck in them. Ones that _never_ ran out. Or he thought looking at James hair (which was naturally sticking up in all directions) maybe he had just been electrocuted, turned in to a mad man, converted his friends and was planning to take over the world. He paused. Maybe he had been watching a bit too much T.V.

However they may have managed it the Maruaders, Mr Evans had to admit, were certainly more entertaining company than Vernon Dursley.

Not that that meant he _liked _them of course. Because he didn't. Quite the contrary actually- _he hated them._ Just marginally less than the walrus...

Before he could analyse his feelings of his daughter's _friends_ any deeper however, Mr Evans was shaken out of his reverie by James (electrocuted) Potter.

The uproar of his calling the Marauders a "club" having died down, James now stood in front of Mr Evans a grave look on his face.

"We are" he said "the Marauders" his tone was solemn though his eyes twinkled with good humour as he gestured to Remus.

Remus nodded before speaking "Mssrs. Moony…"

"Wormtail"

"Padfoot"

"And Prongs"

"_Magical mischief makers_!" they finished together, bowing as they did so.

Mr Evans stared, the side of his lip twitching as though fighting a smile; "So you're a mob eh?"

And to Mr Evans great surprise the Marauders laughed. "Exactly! A mob of _mischief makers_!"

"The _greatest_ mischief makers" Sirius added with a smirk.

And then their tales had started…

They told him about vanishing one Belbys hair, turning their rival teams clothes a sickly pink… On and on they went. Some stories were down right ludicrous, others horrifying, most though were funny, of course Mr Evans neither smiled nor laughed. Nor did he show any form of amusement, preferring to glower at the four boys who seemed determined to finish each other sentences and act out some of their more brilliant pranks.

It was simply preposterous the way they acted; who in their mind disguised themselves as a tree? "It was just for fun of course." Remus said.

"Got a bit boring after a while though" said Sirius thoughtfully before the conversation turned to more recent adventures, leaving a completely a bewildered Mr Evans listening wide eyed and dazed.

* * *

><p><strong>Time: 10:03 pm<strong>

**Location: The Living room, 64 Mills Crescent.**

They stared at each other. Black eyes on blue. Each filled with fierce determination.

_The fight was on…_

Mr Evans tightened his grip on the boys hand and watched as the black eyes widened momentarily in surprise before his usual smirk returned; "Ready _sir_?"

Mr Evans merely grunted in reply, his eyes never leaving the black ones of Sirius black. Black nodded before winking and proceeding to add more force to his own grip.

"Alright there, Mr Evans?"

"_Perfect_ and you?" He asked squeezing just a bit tighter, enjoying the grimace he saw.

_"Brilliant"_

Mr Evans smiled before concentrating on the job at hand. There may not have been a lot he could do to the boys in front of his daughter- _risking her wrath was not worth it_ but this …this really was brilliant. Black was most certainly right about that.

Here, now he could show Black just what he was facing; it was a taster of sorts before tomorrow when he would go in for the kill...

Biting his teeth together, he tried to push Blacks arm down. However much he might have hated to admit it the boy was strong and was putting up a good fight.

Too bad then that it wasn't going to be enough.

Mr Evans smiled; he had been (and still was) a champion arm wrestler amongst his friends, his strength often winning him free beers from his pal Micky who was not only older than Sirius but burlier.

Sirius really didn't stand a chance.

A part of Mr Evans was even slightly disappointed, he enjoyed arm wrestles, it was a shame then that this one would end so soon…

Watching the arm wrestle were the other Marauders and of course Lily. Peter had his mouth hanging open, his body bouncing in excitement, Remus was, Mr Evans was delighted to see, smirking at his friends obvious discomfort because although Sirius had his usual smirk and was trying his upmost best to keep his face cool and nonchalant, his eyes betrayed him and Remus just like Mr Evans could see his pain and mental flinch. Lily too was smirking at Sirius- she knew her father to be a great arm wrestler and could see from the iron look in his eyes he was giving it his all.

"Looks like he wants to cry doesn't he?" Whispered James in to her ear. She shivered slightly at his closeness.

"Serves him right"

James laughed and nodded and she turned her head towards his. Their faces were inches away from each other. Laughter still etched upon both. Lily opened her mouth before…

_"And I win!"_ Jumping slightly, she turned to see Sirius practically dancing around the room. Shaking herself she went to congratulate him not noticing her father's eyes on her.

Mr Evans was furious. Livid, even. He had been _so_ close. _So_ close to winning, Sirius's arm had been merely an inch from the table and Mr Evans had already begun mentally celebrating his win when he did what no good arm wrestler does; _he lost focus. _

It wasn't his fault.

It was that damn Potters fault.

He had been practically sitting on Lily! Whispering nonsense in her ear and Mr Evans had been straining his ears to hear the_ nonsense_. Whatever he had said, Lily had found it amusing. Although thought Mr Evans moodily, she seems to find anything Potter finds simply _hilarious_. But that hadn't been the crux of the problem.

No, the thing that had made Mr Evan heart sink to his toes, made his hand lose all grip, made him see red, was when Lily had turned her head towards that stupid, bloody …_Potter._

She had sworn she was single. Sworn it. Mr Evans sighed as he plopped himself down on the rigid stool, it squeaked under his weight.

_She wouldn't lie to me, she wouldn't._

**A/N: Hi! Sorry for late update- I know I said I would update on Monday but life as usual got in the way, on the plus side this chapter is much, much longer then the last so I hope it was worth the wait. I'm not sure it flows the way I wanted it to but I really enjoyed writing it. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, subscribed or favourited this story! I don't know when my next update will be, I have my a-level exams in two weeks so I've been writing on my revision breaks but hopefully it should be soon, if not please don't give up on this story it will be updated! Don't forget to review :D**


	4. Sleeping Arrangements

**Typos fixed- 14/03/12**

**Sleeping Arrangements**

_**In which there is eavesdropping, tents, and the discovery of a plan.**_

* * *

><p>There is nothing in the world that can match the feeling of watching your baby fall asleep in your arms. With their tiny fingers and soft, soft skin they are miracles and when that miracle gives a small yawn and closes their eyes its...<em>amazing.<em>

They look, they _are _peaceful and beautiful and innocent. And in that moment nothing else matters, not the latest news in the daily paper, or the gloom and rain, or the debts that could soon be knocking on your door.

Nothing matters but your child in your arms and its _bliss_.

Pure and simple bliss.

Mr Evans could remember that feeling very well. So well in fact, that it felt as though it had only been yesterday. He heaved a heavy sigh. If only, he thought, he could go back to those happy days.

He missed the feeling of complete bliss that could come even after a nappy change or a particularly loud crying tantrum. Life had been so simple back then. Worries had been whether Lily would like the latest baby food he had brought home. Not whether she liked the boys _she _had brought home. His head twitched.

Growing up it seemed, was quite intent on ruining every minute of Mr Evans life.

Take this very moment for instance.

There they all were in his living room, _the Marauders_ . He scoffed as he thought the name; _ridiculous._

You see that never ending evening had still not ended; Mr Evans was still sitting on that rigid stool and the Marauders were (of course) still being quite loud.

"Look who's the pillow" Sirius sniggered and Mr Evans looked up from his gardening magazine_ (The English Garden), _and followed Sirius' eye.

The image that met him made his own eyes pop wide, his blood pressure soar, and a surge of anger to sweep through him.

There was Lily, his Lily fast asleep; looking so peaceful Mr Evans nearly smiled. Nearly. The thing that ruined this image of bliss was, you see _James Potter _on whose Lilys head rest.

Her arm, in her sleep had found its way around his torso and James on his part was looking down at her with what anybody, or rather anybody that wasn't a raging father, intent on keeping his daughter single would be able to note as tenderness. Mr Evans, however as _a raging father, intent on keeping his daughter single _did not see the look as tenderness. He saw it as... Well, he didn't even know himself what it was, but that was beside the point! The point was he didn't like it. _At all._

James turned to look at him; "erm Mr Evans could you show me Lilys room- I'll pick her up. No point waking her up, not when..."

He cleared his throat and began to move slightly.

"There will be need for that" said Mr Evans suddenly; his brown eyes boring into James own hazel ones. "I'll manage" and with that he stood up.

"Oh no its fine sir- Lily mentioned you had a bad back- I can manage"

Bad back? Mr Evans snorted. He hadn't cared about his bad back when Sirius Black had stolen the arm chair.

He gritted his teeth and forced his face into a smile; "you're a guest James, Lily is _my _daughter, you needn't take the trouble, besides" he added before he could help himself, "a skinny bloke like you- I doubt you'd _manage_"

James mouth dropped open, his eyes darting to his friends, from Sirius who was sniggering, to Remus who suddenly seemed to have been overcome by a rather bad cough.

"Oh it's not a problem Mr Evans" piped up Peter cheerily. All eyes turned to him. "James has plenty of practice of picking up lily"

Silence.

James closed his eyes as though to pray.

Remus shook his head at his friend, a grimace on his face.

Sirius rolled his eyes before slapping a hand against the back of Peters head. "_Ow!"_

"And what" asked Mr Evans _"is that supposed to mean?" _

His face was now a tomato red and the Marauders exchanged quick glances; if he was anything like Lily…

"Urmm, I urhh..."

"Lily reads a lot" Remus said.

"Yeah" said James, nodding vigorously "till quite late actually and..."

"And" added Sirius "sometimes she falls asleep... right there in the common room"

"Yeah, and so I urm, I take her to her room... that's it. And well, it's only happened about twice since..."

"Since our first year" Finished Remus quickly

"Exactly!" added James

Mr Evans narrowed his eyes at the boys. He wasn't buying it, not one bit. He may have been more close to fifty then forty but that certainly did not mean he was stupid! In fact, he'd go as far as to say he had more brains then the four_ Marauders_ (his mouth twisted at the word) had altogether.

Did they seriously think they could lie to him? _To him?_ So maybe he didn't have a fancy degree, and ok he had once lost five hundred pounds by falling for the absurd lies of a builder called Phil, but when it came to his daughter, well, then he was as sharp as sharp could be.

So sharp in fact that he knew without a doubt that the words out of the four hooligan's mouths had been complete and utter nonsense. Hadn't Lily once told him (in an attempt to ease his nerves) that boys were not allowed to go up to the girls dormitories…there was of course the possibility that she was lying but …no…the smirk that had adorned her face was evidence enough that Hogwarts (rightly so) had measures to give the_ animals_ away from his daughter.

And his wife had said he had no skills of deduction!

As much as Mr Evans wanted congratulate himself for seeing through the lies of the boys (some fathers were, he was sad to admit, quite lacking in this area of expertise) his more dominant thought was to make those boys pay…

His hands twitched, a violent urge overcoming him. He would have liked nothing more that moment than to pick up each of the boys by the scruff of the neck and throw them in the freezing night air, strangling them seemed quite tempting too, although somehow he gathered Lily would not be too pleased if he was arrested for murdering her friends, no matter what their misdemeanours.

He made a fist with his hand, then shook his head; as strong as the urge to give the Marauders a lesson was, he had promised himself the plan would begin in the dawn of the next day and so that's when it would begin. He smiled as he thought over his plans; confront, scare, and watch as they scarper!

But that was tomorrow.

Standing up from the stool which had given him a rather stiff body, he ignored the silent conversation the Marauders seemed to be having and trudged over to James Potter, otherwise known as _The Infuriating Boy Who Had Turned His Life into a Living Hell. _

"Here" he said gruffly "give her to me"

James opened his mouth, closed it, looked at his friends and then turned to Mr Evans. "Erm, what if she wakes up?"

"She won't" Mr Evans retorted shortly "when she's out she's out… just like her mother was"

James gulped; "Will you, well, will you manage?" he turned his lips up into an apologetic smile.

Mr Evans growled; "Of course, I'll ruddy well manage. I'm her _father_!"

James once again opened and closed his mouth.

"Oh just give her, you bloody fish!"

Ignoring the muffled laughter of his friends, James gaped at Mr Evans before shifting so that he could pick Lily up.

Mr Evans first thought as he put his arms around his daughter was..._just like when she was small_.

When she was fully in his arm however he couldn't help thinking...

_Blimey she's heavy!_ He shook himself mentally. He could remember when she barely weighed anything but now…

Not that he was implying she was fat of course, he shivered as he thought what Lily would say (or shout) if she could read his mind at this moment. She might not have been as self- conscious about herself as Petunia (who had recently taken to only eating greens) but Mr Evans knew from experience, no women liked to be told she was heavy.

If he had had a son it would have been one the most important rules that he would have been taught; _if you want to live, they're as light as a feather. Always._

Gritting his teeth, he tightened his hold on her; she was his daughter, he would manage...even if his stiff back felt like hell.

He started towards the living room door before pausing. It seemed James "fish" Potter was following him; he raised an eyebrow at the boy.

"I just...I just need the bathroom"

Mr Evans narrowed his eyes before nodding. He couldn't exactly stop the boy from relieving himself, and yet he couldn't stop the pang of annoyance that he felt either.

Now, well, now he couldn't pause on the steps to catch his breath or for that matter mutter some of his choicest profanities. It wasn't that James could say anything if he did but...well he couldn't, _wouldn't_ let the boy think he couldn't carry his own daughter.

No, he would not show signs of weakness!

In his head he saw Lilys mother mouth the word; _"pride"._ Humph! As if- it was nothing to do with pride.

_Nothing. At. All. _

He had reached the foot of the stairs; blimey had their always been so many?

One step.

Two steps.

_Oof_

Three steps.

He closed his eyes.

Four. Five.

_May the force be with me_ he thought before gritting his teeth and taking the last few steps and giving an inaudible sigh of relief when he reached the landing.

_Finally. _

Before he could take the last small steps to his daughter's bedroom however, he noticed that James Bloody Potter was standing frozen behind him; "What?" he asked through gritted teeth. It was amazing, he thought, how this boy had the ability to rile him in a way no other person had ever done. Not even the latest politicians, or for that matter Vernon Dursley had made him lose all sense of his manners.

He raised an eyebrow when James stayed silent, he was staring Mr Evans noticed with annoyance at Lily; "Through there" he indicated a door with his head.

James looked up in confusion.

"_The bathroom. Is. Through. There_." Mr Evans repeated through gritted teeth. God, that boy was slow.

"_Wha..?_ Oh yeah ...ok"

Mr Evans shook his head, the boy was on drugs.

He was sure of it.

* * *

><p>A little while later after tucking his baby girl in, in a way he had been unable to do for years Mr Evans finally trudged down the stairs.<p>

He had just been about to open the living room door when he heard the voices in side; were they arguing? For a second Mr Evans paused, the moral thing he thought would be to quietly leave but… the _father_ thing to do would be to eavesdrop wouldn't it? And besides he told himself it wasn't really eavesdropping was it now? It was after all his own home and he was merely standing in the hallway of that home and if he _happened_ to hear some conversations, well then it wasn't his fault now was it?

"_You"_

_"Why does it always have to me?"_ another voice said, sounding rather annoyed.

"I know" announced another voice; _"Peter should ask!"_

_"I will not!"_

"Well, you're probably best mates with old Mr E now aren't you_...James has picked up Lily loads of time_...honestly"

"I do not sound like that!" And Mr Evans despite himself sniggered; whoever had been doing the impression _(Sirius, perhaps?) _had done a pretty good job copying the squeak of Peter Pettigrew.

"Excellent idea, Padfoot!"

"_Oi!_ Well _I think_ it should be Prongs since it his gir…_ow!_ _What was that for?" _Mr Evans listening outside the door felt his heart rate increase, so Lily was dating James then. His heart sank. She had lied but… he shook his head. He would need to find out the details of how a…a… _baboon _such as James Potter had managed to entrap his darling daughter, only how? Suddenly an image came to mind, an image of him sitting down by his dining room table, Peter Pettigrew across him, a plate of Victoria sponge between them. He smirked and began to listen to the on-going argument, his curiosity returning.

"I reckon it should be Moony"

"Hey! Why me?"

"I dunno your all… sensible and stuff"

"Yeah and you looked pretty cosy talking to him earlier" another voice said in a accusatory tone? Mr Evans frowned, his confusion increasing. _Just what were they talking about?_

"Right, then it's decided. Moony, you are our spokesman tonight!"

"What? No…I won't"

Mr Evans shook his head; the conversation the Marauders were having seemed to be a never ending circle. If he did not intervene now, well, he'd probably be stuck out here all night. And besides it wasn't as if they had given him anything but a severe headache in the past five minutes and so with that in mind he pushed the door open.

The voices instantly quietened but Mr Evans saw James and Sirius give Remus significant looks - with Peter nudging him in the back.

Mr Evans could not help but frown, he may not have known what they were up to but they were as they had told him numerous times this evening _The Marauders,_ or as Mr Evans saw them; a gang of four highly dangerous individuals.

And how you may ask did he come to this significant conclusion, well it was simple really; they were boys, _teenage boys_, (in short the most dangerous species on the planet) add to this the fact that they seemed to have a certain…fondness for mischief well, then the Marauders were about as dangerous as a missile, from the future, armed with all weird rubbish and in this case, magic.

"Mr Evans?" squeaked Peter; "Remus…Remus, wants to ask you something"

James and Sirius sniggered at the look of outrage on Remus face.

"Well" asked Mr Evans trying to ignore the amusement he felt at the sight of pudgy Peter crossing his arms petulantly as Remus glared at him. "What is it?"

"It's …we, we were just wandering where…where we were supposed to sleep?"

Mr Evans froze.

"Lily did tell you we were staying over right?" Asked James, his eyes wide

"Of course she told me" Mr Evans said irritably "But, but… where are your things?" he was grasping for straws now.

Each of the boys took out small toy sized trunk from their pockets; "We shrank them, easier you know?"

Mr Evans grunted; the problem, (though he did not mention it to the Marauders) was that despite Lily clearly requesting him to sort out some _"sleeping arrangements" _he had somehow, remarkably forgotten.

_It wasn't his fault. _

It was well, _their_ fault.

Yes, that was right, it was the bloody Marauders fault.

If they hadn't been well, _male_ then he wouldn't have got himself in such a worried state and then he could have perfectly happily sorted out some sleeping arrangements.

Yes, it was entirely _their _fault.

What business did they have coming to Cokeworth anyway? Huh?

What was the point? That is apart from, of course, causing additional white hairs on his already greying head.

No, he would _refuse_ to take blame for this.

But...Forgetting the blame, _where would they sleep?_ He glanced at the boys who were staring at him in confusion.

"Well, you're not particularly tired _now_ are you?" he asked hopefully.

The boys and Mr Evans turned to the clock; it was now closer to twelve than eleven.

He cleared his throat; "Young boys like you, I expect you head to bed much later"

Remus frowned; "We do... Sometimes" Sirius snorted. "But it's been a long day, we left Hogwarts quite early and then we..."

"Alright, alright" said Mr Evans waving Remus down. Bloody annoying git, that boy was. "Let me finish my magazine- ill sort you lads out a room soon enough"

They shared a look before nodding and heading to a corner where he supposed, they would probably talk about rude and inconsequential things.

For once though they were _quiet_ and yet Mr Evans couldn't help but scowl- quiet meant he couldn't mutter obscenities or plans under his breath. He grimaced and picked up _The English Garden_ (which he bought now more out of habit than anything else) and opened it at a random page.

_Where could he put them?_

The house had once had three bedrooms; one for him and the late Mrs Evans, and then one for Lily and Petunia respectively. When Petunia had moved to London a year ago however, she had thoroughly evacuated the room and informed her father he could do whatever he pleased with it since was "quite sure" she would never sleep in the house ever again.

This had not been the case, Petunia had returned to the house numerous times; once for a friend's wedding, once because a friend's friend was divorcing and apparently needed all the moral support she could get and for a week when Vernon was still arranging a flat for her.

Mr Evans had, however done as he pleased with the room, meaning that on these visits Petunia had been forced to make do with her sister's room, this was because Mr Evans had not only made her old room impossible to sleep in but also virtually impossible to _step in._

The once salmon pink walls were now no longer visible thanks to the multitudes of boxes that lined them. Boxes with old Manchester United memorobilla, car magazines, baby clothes, photo albums...

Mr Evans was, though he could not see it himself, _a hoarder_.

The idea of throwing a single item away was unimaginable to him; you could never, he would say, know when they would come in hand, or indeed if in one of these boxes lay a hidden treasure that would make him millions, or at the very least a couple of hundred.

This inability to throw away meant that now only two rooms remained; one being Lily's own room, which of course_ they _would not be sleeping in and the last, his own room which he reckoned was too small for five men, or rather one man and four _boys_.

He scratched his head absentmindedly; _where then would he put them?_

He looked around the living room, could they possibly sleep in there? One could sleep on the sofa and if various objects were pushed away such as the small table and the TV set surely there would be enough space. And they would be downstairs. It wasn't as if they could cause any damage. Yes, they would be downstairs whilst he and Lily were safely...

He paused.

Lily.

What if one of the nincompoops (James Potter specifically) decided to pay his dear daughter a night time visit? What if they _canoodled_ or... did something equally (if not more) horrendous?

Shuddering, he turned the page of his magazine (it was essential to keep up appearances after all) and began to think of ways to combat his situation.

Two minutes later, inspiration struck.

He would sleep in the same room as the boys, (wherever that may be) and consequently he would be able to keep a steady eye on them.

But that still left, he realised the issue of _where _they would sleep. He looked down at the magazine in hand, a thoughtful expression on his face...

_"It was an absolutely wonderful experience" writes Margery Wells, of Cornwall; "to be so in touch with nature..."_

Mr Evans scratched his nose.

_Mr Smith of Surrey says he prefers..._

He closed his eyes- what to do? What to do?

He sighed and looked back down; in a small corner was the heading;

_"And the winner of our latest competition was Mr John Lockwood of Leicester. Mr Lockwood enjoyed a quiet weekend in the Forest of Dean where he was treated to... _

Mr Evans frowned and looked closer at the magazine and in particular at a picture of the lucky John Lockwood.

His heart raced; it was perfect, beyond perfect even... But did he still have...

Abruptly, Mr Evans stood up and ignoring the bewildered boys he practically ran out of the room. He was a genius, he really truly was. Take that, Agnes he said mentally to his late wife.

Taking two steps at a time he made his way up the stairs and into Petunias old room (more recently known as the _dump _room).

Pushing the door open was hard and when it finally relented Mr Evans saw why. The room was... A mess. With boxes and boxes piled up. A broken TV set lay in one corner and an old bike that he had once used when he still cared about his bulging stomach. Blimey! He thought, he'd forgotten how full it was and now seeing the overflowing boxes he felt quite sheepish- it seemed Lily had not been exaggerating about the size of his dump.

He cursed, the room was so full he doubted he would be able to find anything, forget something he hadn't used for over ten years.

But he could not give up.

He was an Evans, and Evans never gave up.

Gritting his teeth, he made his way into the room and began rummaging through boxes before (approximately half an hour later) triumphantly finding his treasure...

After doing a mental sort of jig at his success and studiously trying to ignore the voice of reason (his wife) he made his way down the stairs. The Marauders all looked up at his arrival and Peter who seemed to have dozed off gave a jerk and mumbled; "the git back yet?"

Sirius coughed loudly, Remus once again dropped his head in to his hands, whilst James looked murderous. Mr Evans, however was so euphoric at his plan that he barely paid attention, it was one night, just one night, and tomorrow he would be rid of them.

"You boys enjoy an adventure don't you?"

They exchanged glances before nodding "yeah, like we said..."

But Remus was cut of.

"And you like trying new experiences?"

Again they nodded and Mr Evans mirrored them, desperately trying to hide his glee.

"Well, then you'll be up for sleeping outside tonight won't you?"

The Marauders merely stared, unsure perhaps if Mr Evans was being serious.

"Yes, tonight we" he gestured around at them "will be sleeping in tents outside"

"You're joking, right?" asked Sirius at the same time as James said; "we are?"

"Yes" answered Mr Evans staring at James "I have the tents the sleeping bags ready. Now, if you please…" he nodded to the door.

"But...but its winter" said Peter

"It's bloody freezing out there! _Literally,_ what was it that weather person said? Ah yes _minus 3_!"

"-5 actually" put in Remus

"Exactly, minus five"

"With all due respect Mr Evans, you cannot be serious- we'll freeze out there."

Mr Evans glared at Remus and stood up straighter.

"I am completely serious and _you _have no choice in the matter, as it is there is no other space in the house"

"What about here?"

"No can do"

Sirius growled; "I'm not sleeping out there it's..."

"Mental" finished Peter

"Exactly, mental"

James who had yet to speak suddenly stood up; "I …I…think we should listen to Mr Evans"

The room grew silent, and Mr Evans felt suddenly irritated; why was Potter agreeing? It would be so much more…_fun _if he was reluctant as his friends, at least that way Mr Evans could enjoy watching the boy who had made him suffer, suffer himself.

_"What?"_

James smiled; "Mr Evans is right it'll be an experience right? And" he continued when the others looked dubious "its not the first time we've spent a night out doors or the coldest for that matter" and he sent a significant look towards Remus that Mr Evans could not understand.

"Yes but…"

"You've always wanted to go camping right Sirius? Well, look here's a chance and it's _muggle _camping!"

"In a garden"

James sent him a look; "It's camping" and Mr Evans watched in amazement as Sirius stared back at James, it seemed they were having their own private conversation.

"Fine" Sirius sighed before muttering; "You owe me"

James grinned; "Moony?"

Remus sighed; "It's …but…" he looked at his two friends; "Ok, it's bonkers but well, we've had worse nights right?"

"Exactly!"

"Pete?" but Mr Evans could tell that James was asking only for the sake of asking, it was clear to him and the others it seemed that when Sirius and James had agreed Peters mind had been made up.

Mr Evans shook his head; they were by far the four most bizarre boys he had ever met.

"Right then" he said "let's get going shall we"

Twenty minutes later, saw all the Marauders and Mr Evan outside wearing as many layers as possible and still shivering. It may have seemed mad, and perhaps _was_ mad but to Mr Evans it really was well and truly perfect.

Not only did it complete the function of keeping the boys away from Lily, and allowed him to keep an eye on them but (and this was the best part) it meant that they had to suffer! And yes, so maybe he had to suffer with them, but it was for his daughter, and as a father he would do anything for his daughter, including sleeping outside in his tiny backyard during winter- in England.

There were two tents; one in which Remus and Peter would be sleeping, and the other in which Sirius, James and Mr Evans would sleep. He had reckoned that those two were the most dangerous.

To say the tent would have been a squeeze with the three of them squashed together would have been an understatement. With James gangly legs, Sirius desire to spread his arms as wide as possible, and Mr Evans quite…large stomach, it was a tight fit. Which was why Mr Evans instructed Remus to make some changes…

"You" he said pointing

"Me?"

"Yes you, Lupin" said Mr Evans irritably. "You're seventeen, right?"

Remus nodded.

"And so you can do whatsit outside school?"

"Magic?"

"Yes, magic! You can do magic outside school?"

Remus nodded again.

"Right then, make this tent a bit bigger will you, oh and add a heating thingy on it"

Remus raised an eyebrow

"What? it's bloody cold! Now, get a move on will you boy"

Remus sniggered and did as he was told and Mr Evans did his best to try and hide his curiosity and excitement at seeing magic done. Lily was not yet old enough to do magic at home, but Mr Evans practically bounced when she told him her tales from school, in front the Marauders, however he was a _dignified_ man, who had _no time_ to be excited about magic.

Laying slightly uncomfortably in his sleeping bag a while later, Mr Evans thought over the past two days...

First, he had had to suffer from a meeting with Vernon Dursley, the Walrus and then barely twenty four hours later he had four boys turn up at his door step. Two of which were currently asleep in sleeping bags beside him.

Not as close as before but still close enough for Mr Evans to hear the snores of James Potter. God, he hated that boy! He was infuriatingly …funny and tall and had electrocuted hair and for Gods sakes, he was far too close to Lily. And so maybe she had said they weren't dating, but he wasn't blind. They were acting just like a couple. And then Peter earlier… He turned to his side.

Tomorrow he would find out.

Everything.

For the time being however, he thought of the other three boys who were just as strange as James Potter himself. There was Sirius Black, the bad boy who had beaten him at an arm wrestle. Mr Evans frowned, again that was Potters fault. And then there was Remus Lupin, who was perhaps the strangest with all his scars, and then Peter Pettigrew who to Mr Evans seemed to be the odd one out; far too clumsy, no tact, no sense even.

He cringed, as James gave a particularly loud snore and Sirius twisted in his own sleeping bag.

They were strange, bizarre, crazy… nonetheless there was a part of him, (which he was as yet not aware of) that wished he had met the boys under some other conditions. That part of him realised that had the fear of them stealing his daughter not been there he would have found their jokes amusing, and more than that he would have admired their friendship. Which was so unique, so different, to any other friendship he had seen. Unfortunately for the Marauders this was all in Mr Evans unconscious and so for the time being, he was filled with the usual paranoia and irritation at the four boys.

It was this paranoia that meant Mr Evans did not let himself fall into a deep sleep, which meant he was awake when Sirius Black crawled out of the tent at approximately half past two in the morning on Christmas Eve.

Mr Evans heart sped up. He had been right. They were up to something, but why then was James Potter still snoring besides him?

Filled with suspicion and an increasing heart rate Mr Evans tried to control his breathing.

Finally, after a silent fight with his sleeping bag and accidentally hitting James Potter in the face (who continued sleeping), he crawled to the opening of the tent.

Fortunately for Mr Evans Sirius Black, along with Remus and Peter were siting just outside the tent talking in quiet voices.

Straining his ears Mr Evans tried to hear what they were saying.

"_It's ridiculous! I can't believe anyone can be so blind"_

"_Yeah, well that's why we're here isn't it" said exasperated voice._

"_So what are we going to do now?" Mr Evans felt his heart race._

"_You mean how are we going to get Lily and James out on a date?"_

"_Well, first we have to hit some sense into both of them."_

"_Yeah, let them see it's not the end of the world and then execute the rest of the plan, bit by bit."_

"_But you think it will work the plan?"_

"_Of course it will Wormtail"_

"_It better work- I'm not sleeping with Mr Evans in a tent, in the middle of winter, for nothing. I swear of it doesn't I'll kill prongs myself!"_

"_But it's not his…"_

"_Shut up Wormtail. I'm not in the mood to listen to your bloody whining" _

"_Sirius!"_

"_What? I'm tired."_

Mr Evans heard a loud yawn and quickly scrambled back to his sleeping bag. His mind racing from all he had heard.

So they thought he was blind did he? Anger soared with him. Well, he most certainly wasn't.

And he had been right! There was a plan…he frowned…

Were Lily and James dating then? Were they scared to tell him? Did they like Remus had said think it _would be the end of the world_ if they let him know?

He scratched his head; or maybe they weren't dating, maybe, maybe they were scared to go on their first date? But no, they were too comfortable together and then with what he had heard Peter almost say earlier, and this conversation now…they had to be dating.

Mr Evans shook his head; the details were not at this present moment important. What was important, however, was that _there was a plan_ and by the sounds of it had been Prongs or rather James ruddy Potter, with his annoying face and stupid hair that had orchestrated the whole thing. He had dragged his friends here and now Mr Evans thought; _I'll chase them out…_

**Hi! This chapter was written mostly at night when I couldn't sleep and during revision breaks but I'm happy with it overall and I hope you guys enjoy it. Next chapter will be called A marauder Order and should make things clearer about just what they are up to but it'll only be out after my last exam (on the 17****th****). Anyway, an enormous thank you to everyone that reviewed this story! If you did put this on your favourite's then thanks a lot- I'm glad you're enjoying the story but please review constructive criticism is welcomed! Hope you all had a great New Years and have a great 2012!**


	5. A Marauder Order

A Marauder Order

Or the time Mr Evans became an interrogator, the Marauders issued an order and James made breakfast

It had been the worst night of his life.

Worse than any of the (many) nights Agnes had made him sleep on the couch.

Worse than the night Lily had cried and cried.

Worse even than the night after he had had the misfortune of watching Manchester United lose to Southampton. _Southampton._

Yes, it was safe to say that that particular night, or rather early morning had been the worst of Mr Evans existence.

For one Sirius bloody Black had seemed to think it would a good idea to trip over his own feet and consequently landed directly on to Mr Evans who resisted (with much difficulty) the urge to swear or even more tempting the urge to kick Black right where it hurt.

When Black had finally managed to get himself into his own sleeping bag, James Potter had thought it would be a good idea to give a loud snore.

Scowling Mr Evans had turned on to his side, he had just got into a comfortable position when the dreams started; the Marauders putting him into a blender, which was really a cauldron, whilst Lily watched on James Potters lap, and then there was Pettigrew with a big Victoria sponge, stuffing his mouth and Black had an oversized arm and…and…

_What was that?_ Mr Evans sneezed. Something it seemed was tickling his nose. How strange he thought and yawning opened his eyes.

Anger bubbled fiercely under his skin and he was tempted not for the first time to commit murder. Sirius Black had you see once again managed to stretch his arms as far apart as possible and then let them rest directly on Mr Evans face.

Growling Mr Evans pushed the arm of none to gently and stood up as fast as the squashed tent and his bad back would allow him, fully intent on giving Sirius Black a good old speaking too.

Upon standing however, Mr Evans noticed something that made all thoughts of Sirius Black disappear from his mind. There were it seemed more pressing issues at hand; James Potter was not in the tent.

He froze.

Wild thoughts, _scary,_ fearful thoughts filled his mind; Lily and James close together, Lily and James next to each other, Lily and James…

He gulped; no, he would not think of _that._

_That_ was…and…_urgh_…he shuddered.

He would need to think rationally; a soldier would never survive by panicking. No, he would remain calm and assess the situation carefully before jumping to …. _Conclusions._

But if, _if_ James Potter was found to be partaking in such… _activities_ with his daughter, well then he would suffer for it.

Mr Evans then mentally reprimanded himself for not noticing James Potters absence earlier, before making his way out of the tent, and so absorbed in his thoughts of breaking a certain somebody's nose that he did not even notice that the night had brought snow until his bare foot hit the icy ground.

_What the bleeding..?_

Cursing the heavens and his unlucky stars Mr Evans hopped to the back door of his house, pushing it open so forcefully he gave the person on the other side quite a shock.

_"What in Merlins name…" _

Mr Evans jumped; "Lily? What are you doing here?" he turned and looked suspiciously around the kitchen.

"Merlin dad! You gave me a shock" she shook her head, before glancing down at him; "_and why on earth are you barefoot?"_

Mr Evans scratched his head sheepishly; "I…well, I urm…"

"You forgot your shoes didn't you" and the way she said it, reminded Mr Evans uncannily of his late wife.

"I did not! I merely felt like…experiencing the feeling of the ground on my feet. They never had shoes in the Stone Age, you know" he nodded wisely.

Lily shook her head again, a half amused, half exasperated smile on her face; "It's_ snowing_"

"I bet they didn't have shoes in the ice age either."

Lily opened her mouth, paused, then shook her head; "well, why don't you get yourself next to the heater anyhow, it's bloody freezing out there"

Shrugging and pulling a face as though a heater was an unsavoury prospect, Mr Evans trudged to the living room, inside however every muscle, every cell was crying for heat. Not that he would show it; Oh no, he was an Evans and even to his daughter he would not admit a mistake or in fact _any _weakness.

By the time he had entered the living room however, he could barely resist the urge to run any longer and wobbled as fast as he could to his plump arm chair, which was conveniently situated right next to the heater.

Nor could he resist the "_ahh"_ that escaped, as he absorbed the glorious heat and his body melded into his precious armchair.

"Hard night?" Lily asked, a smirk playing on her lips.

Mr Evans replied with a grumble.

Lily laughed before making her way over to him and wrapping her arms around him. "I've missed you, you know"

He smiled at her; "I've missed you too…_ Lilykins_"

She frowned at the name.

"What?" Mr Evans asked innocently "that's what _Black_ calls you isn't it?"

Lily shifted away from her father; "Sirius is a joker- he finds a new nickname for me every day, it's getting quite old actually and rather annoying"

She pulled a face but Mr Evans noticed the smile behind the complaint. It did not do anything but increase, his already mounting dislike for the boy.

"So, why did you decide it would be a good idea to sleep outside, in the _middle of winter_ I might add?" She asked arms folded in a manner that made Mr Evans squirm.

_"Wasn't my idea"_

Lily raised an eyebrow.

"It wasn't" protested Mr Evans indignantly; you knew things were bad, he thought, when your own daughter didn't believe you.

"It was those friends of yours" he shook his head "_mad _I tell you"

"Well, according to James you were _quite _enthusiastic about it"

"Complaining about me was he? _Lying_"

Lily frowned; "no actually, he said it was a great idea, said you really got to know each other out there"

Mr Evans snorted; _yes, he had really got to know the boys last night…_

"…completely _bonkers_! It was minus five dad!"

Mr Evans waved a hand dismissively; "It wasn't _that_ cold"

"But…"

"Lily, its Christmas Eve, a time of…" _what was it they had said on those Christmas shows?_ "…joy and family and …uhh, appreciating what we have…._leave it be eh?_"

Lily frowned and stared at her father before smiling; "It is isn't it? You know dad, I've got a feeling this is going to be one great Christmas, or at least one to remember"

"With those… _monkeys?"_

"Yes, with those monkeys" she laughed; "Merlin knows nothing is ordinary with James Potter around."

Mr Evans shuddered and couldn't help but feel a tad disappointed; Petunia he had expected to be into all that soppy, lovey dovey, puke inducing rubbish but _Lily?_ The way she talked about the Marauders, about James… it was nauseating.

He shook his head; "So where is the little bugger anyway?" He asked looking around suspiciously as he half expected James to pop out from a cupboard.

Lily sighed; "he's gone to the shops"

_"He's what?"_

"Gone to the shops- he's an early riser. And he decided he wanted to make breakfast today" she smiled and looked towards the clock. It was Mr Evans realised with a shock, a quarter past nine.

"He shouldn't be long now"

"You think it's safe, letting him cook? I mean what if he…I don't know, sets the house on fire or something" he shuddered "to be honest that boy doesn't look like he could tell the difference between a frying pan and a...a _pot"_

"Could you?" Asked Lily with a smile.

"_Excuse me young lady,_ I have been cooking and…"

"So you haven't just been going to old Joes then?"

"_Of course not!"_

"And no lunch at the pub?"

"Not once" he said resentfully, hurt it seemed at such assumptions (even if they were true).

"Now back to the point, Potter won't destroy the house?"

"_No_," she smiled "believe it or not, he's one of the top students in our year. Beats me in some subjects"

"_Cheater"_ Mr Evans coughed.

She shook her head; _"Be nice dad."_

Mr Evans opened his mouth to reply but was cut off by the sound of the door.

Mr Evans turned to Lily; "you gave him the key?" he asked outraged.

She rolled her eyes at her father "Be nice" she said again, Mr Evans studiously looked the other way.

_"Lily! I'm back!" _

It was moments like these that made Mr Evans hate his imagination, something he usually prided himself in. See, James Potter's simple _"Lily! I'm home!"_ managed to create a rather... _Unpleasant_ image in his mind; the image was Lily, beautiful, sweet, smart Lily in a kitchen, quite a clean kitchen actually. She had an apron on, her hair tied into an elegant bun and a diamond ring on _that _finger, a ring that glittered tauntingly as the image of a James potter walking in and saying _"honey I'm home" _emerged.

It did not do anything for Mr Evans nerves, which now seemed to be at breaking point; not only had Lily given James bloody annoying, dangerous Potter the house key, but the damn boy was now going to cook, _cook _in his house. And to add to that Mr Evans was now stuck with an image of Lily and James in marital bliss imprinted in his head!

It was only after he heard the living room door open and the real James Potter entered that Mr Evans awoke from his nightmare. Not that reality was fared much better than the horrors his mind had conjured up.

"Good morning Mr Evans" James said positively beaming; "had a good sleep?"

_Great, just great. _Here was he, Mr Evans, the _man_ of the house, suffering from a bad back, an over active imagination and the crisis of the century and James Potter was in a fantastic mood. Noticing his daughters glare however, Mr Evans put on a smile; "Great and you?"

"Brilliant" said James and Mr Evans scowled; _bloody git._

"So you managed to get everything then?" Asked Lily

"Yup, I told you not to worry, found the shop easy enough, though to be honest that what's his name? Smithy? Yes he's quite..."

"Smithy is a good friend of mine" interjected Mr Evans, glaring all the while at James.

"Ugh yes, well he seems like a great guy just a bit …strange" he looked uncertainly towards Lily who was staring in confusion at her father.

It had been a long known fact, you see in the Evans household that Mr Evans did not see eye to eye with Harold Smith (the strange man from the local corner shop) their feud dating back to school days, when, Mr Evans reported that Smithy had been the reason he had failed a test and consequently had an unpleasant meeting with the headmaster and a cane.

Mr Evans had never, and perhaps would never forget the incident, and this along with the peculiar nature of Smithy had lead Harold Smith to be the number one thing on Mr Evans list of things to complain about.

This morning however things seemed to have changed, hence Lily's confusion, you see what she didn't know was despite her father's apparent dislike for Smithy, his dislike for James Potter, or rather his dislike of the prospect of James Potter being her boyfriend was far greater and so meant he would (naturally) disagree with whatever the boy said.

"Right, well, why don't we get started in the kitchen then?" Asked Lily after trying and failing to catch her father eye.

_"We?"_ James _too happy_ Potter shook his head; "I told you Lily I'm making breakfast today, you go and get ready"

"But..."

"No buts Evans" and then when she opened her mouth to protest "look you know as well as I do that once Sirius gets to the bathroom you'll be waiting for _hours_"

They shared a smile and Mr Evans in his armchair flinched.

"So why don't you get ready- I promise I won't set the house on fire"

Mr Evans snorted, and Lily quite discreetly sent him _The Look_ before turning back to James. The injustice of it all was infuriating to Mr Evans, he was her father and yet, she his daughter was giving him the look. He harrumphed. _He _should have been the one giving _her_ the look for all the obvious _flirting_ she was doing with Potter.

Take this very moment for example, Lily was standing and smiling at James Potter. _Smiling,_ like he was the best bloody thing on the planet. _He wasn't._ And Mr Evans could say that as a completely unbiased man, in his forties, he you see unlike Lily was not an easily charmed teenage girl.

"….but I want a good breakfast Potter"

"Oh just you wait Evans, you'll be amazed, _awestruck_ even at my culinary skills" he smirked. That's right _smirked_. Mr Evans in his arm chair rolled his eyes before coughing loudly, as entertaining as it was too listen to James Potter _try_ and successfully flirt, it was also irritating and he thought dangerous. After all what if Lily found all his quips (and he shuddered to say it) _charming_?

Both Lily and James had jumped at Mr Evans cough, a reminder that he was in the room. "I…I better get going then." Blushed Lily and Mr Evans could not help but scowl at her behaviour as she left the room.

James realising he was now alone in the room with Mr Evans opened his mouth, promptly closed it, indicated towards the door and then managed to say; "Urmm I…I'm going to get breakfast started then" before leaving the room.

Mr Evans shook his head; how could Lily be friends, let alone anything else, with such a _plonker_?

Five minutes later and Mr Evans was still alone in the lounge and in quite the dilemma. On the one hand, he could sit here comfortably in his armchair, relishing the warmth, and make up for lost sleep or... He could go into the kitchen and interrogate potter.

Sighing, he stood up; sometimes it was just so hard being a good father.

Walking in to the small kitchen, he found James Potter mixing a bit of this and that together, in the back of his mind Mr Evans saw it as a mixture of cocaine and some other no doubt, illegal and harmful substance. But that was of course, in the back of his mind.

In reality James Potter was merely mixing a batter of eggs and flour and in the process of making pancakes. Probably taste like rubber thought Mr Evans as he pulled a wooden chair back.

James turned around; "Mr Evans" he greeted with a smile.

Mr Evans simply grunted in reply; it seemed he had been doing quite a lot of grunting lately.

"So James" he cleared his throat; "your parents didn't mind you were not home for Christmas?"

"Not really, they're in the South of France at the moment" said James; "Mums got a cousin there and..."

_Dammit!_ Thought Mr Evans, that hadn't worked... he needed to be _strong_ and _intimidating_, he needed to make James potter feel like a small little boy, preferably one who was at risk of wetting his pants.

_What scared teenagers?_ He thought scratching the back of his head.

He thought back to his own first meeting with his father in law; _"and__** what**__ are your plans for the future?" he_ remembered the fear, the uncertainty that question had brought and so (naturally) asked James the same.

Unfortunately James Potter was a... _Freak of nature._ Questions about the future did not seem to faze him, in fact he smiled. _Smiled. _Mr Evans was, quite rightfully in his opinion outraged.

"I hate planning sir, hate it but I guess I wouldn't mind playing Quidditch it's a..."

"I know what it is!" Said Mr Evans irritably, he had on his first visit to Diagon Alley with Lily bought a Quidditch book out of fascination of the sport, it was one of the few books he had ever read from start to finish.

"Right" James smiled "well I wouldn't mind playing professionally; I reckon I could if I wanted to"

To that Mr Evans had coughed; "So confident are you? _Cocky_ I'd say"

James shrugged; "I'm a good player, and if I didn't want to do that then I could always do something else, I mean I'm considering joining the auror corps- they're like…_urm whats it_? Mol…no police, _detectives_?"

Then he turned back to his work, causing Mr Evans to growl, nothing it seemed could faze James _I'm so great_ Potter; not the questions about his grades ("nearly straight Os, just two Es"), not questions about his detentions; ("it's in the 60s I think now, a record actually"), not questions about _...anything_. Mr Evans was after 20 minutes of questioning grasping for straws.

It was just as James was drinking a glass of water that he asked the next question; _**"Are you dating my daughter?"**_

They had been going on a roll, Mr Evans asking the questions, James answering instantly, no hesitation, this time however was different.

James chocked on his water; "s-sorry_...What?"_

_"Are you dating my daughter?" _ignoring his erratic heartbeat, Mr Evans stared directly at James, radiating a calm and he hoped intimidating aura.

"No! _No_" James shook his head violently. "No, me ...Lily...we're not, I mean _no_, I'm not dating... We're just..." He coughed again, "_just _friends"

Mr Evans eyed the boy in front of him, his face was tainted pink and his usual blasé attitude seemed to have vanished. Mr Evans narrowed his eyes, his mind racing; _just friends?_ Just friends- he scoffed, you didn't make plans when you went to your _just friends'_ house.

He stood up, ready to continue his interrogation and was just about to open his mouth when...

_"Gosh that smells good!" _

It was Lily.

She came into the room, dressed in a warm golden jumper and jeans, her red hair wet. Her smile however dropped slightly at the sight of the kitchen, it wasn't on fire, it wasn't even a mess but the image of her father standing frozen on the spot and James with an empty glass and a horrified expression made her pause.

_"Everything all right?"_ She asked.

James cleared his throat and Mr Evans look at him; what was the boy going to say?

"Brilliant, just on time Lils- why don't you get the plates and ill wake up that lot" he indicated to the tents that could be seen from the window.

Mr Evans breathed a sigh of relief but at the same time could not help the feeling of satisfaction; he liked being right and James Potter had just proved that he was once again right. He had known the boy could not be trusted, known that there had been a plan and he had also known that James Potter was an actor, something that had just been proved. How easily had he lied to Lily? How easily did that fake smile come on to his face?

Mr Evans shook his head; James Potter was just like every other teenage boy on the planet-someone who could not be trusted.

And yet despite coming to this particular conclusion, Mr Evans did not know whether the boy had been lying about dating Lily. On the one hand, his hesitance, his panic could suggest that he was indeed dating Lily and yet… something, something wasn't right. His interrogation of James Potter had taught him the boy was cocky, arrogant, self-assured but it terms of his relationship with Lily, Mr Evans had received more questions than answers.

An hour a later, Mr Evans had just finished one of the greatest breakfasts he had had in years and was severely annoyed by this fact. Even more annoying was the fact that the others seemed to know it.

He had tried to pretend he didn't like it, he complained the scrambled eggs had less salt, he said the bacon wasn't done right and the pancakes were too thick but he couldn't help it that when it came to food, his stomach took over his brain. It wasn't his fault that despite complaining he dished out more eggs and another piece of bacon or that when Lily had taken the last pancake he had eyed it jealously (despite already having had two). James Potter really _was _a good cook and though Mr Evans brain said a brainless git like Potter could never do anything right and his heart was filled with hate, his stomach was strangely approving - something he was rather quite annoyed about.

Even more annoying was the fact that Potter had then had the nerve to be even more goddamn polite; "ill clean-up" he volunteered. And Mr Evans scowled- one thing repeating in his mind; act, it's an act.

And so now, after eating a rather large breakfast Mr Evans was about to make his way into the living room and since it seemed Lily was offering to help James, it meant Mr Evans now had access to the other marauders; it was time, he thought, for interrogation number two.

"You boys finished?" he asked.

Sirius looked up, "erm yeah" he turned to Remus and Peter, Remus was already standing up, Peter however was looking longingly at the remnants of the breakfast, until that is Sirius slapped him on the back of his head.

"Right then come with me."

The three boys exchanged looks with James before nodding, Lily Mr Evans saw was watching him curiously and so before she could begin her own interrogation he trudged out of the small kitchen.

The three boys grudgingly followed him in to the living room and Mr Evans who was happy that the time for action had finally come could barely contain his glee.

"Sit down"

The three boys exchanged confused glances.

"Look Mr Evans there's something..."

"Sit down!" He glared at the boys, looking directly into the black, brown and blue eyes.

The Marauders sat though Mr Evans noticed they fidgeted in the most suspicious manner. He paused for a second, wandering how to begin; the best way he concluded would be to get straight to the point.

_"I don't like you."_

Peter stared his eyes almost popping out, Remus hid a smirk, whilst Sirius merely smiled (Mr Evans reckoned he had been told he was not liked more than enough times for it to bother him anymore)

"No, I _really_ don't like you, any of you, you" he nodded to Sirius " are a rebel, the type I'm sure that is responsible for all the broken hearts in the country" Sirius smirked; "and you" he turned to peter "are a wimp. I _hate_ wimps" Peters lip trembled; but Mr Evans ignored him and turned to Remus "you" he said "are..._weird_. Ok? You act all sensible and brainy and stuff but you're not… you're _their_ friends! And I ..."

"Let me guess, you don't like him either" Smirked Sirius.

"No I don't!" said Mr Evans his eyes bulging "And I certainly don't like that..._that_ friend of yours in the kitchen! In fact I hate him more than the lot of you put together and I want to know what the hell he is up to"

He eyed the four boys, a technique he had learned from watching his favourite detective shows.

"Prongs is up to something?" Asked Peter, his eyebrows furrowing together in confusion

"He's _always _up to something" Sighed Remus

"Yeah" frowned Sirius "only this time we don't seem to know about it"

"Don't lie!" spat Mr Evans "I heard you ok_, I heard you last night!"_

"No idea what you're talking about" said Sirius leaning back into his chair and folding his arms.

Mr Evans growled; "I heard YOU! I heard you leave the tent, and I heard your conversation you great… _baboon!"_

"No, doesn't ring any bells" said Sirius, now putting his hands behind his head.

_"Padfoot!"_ it was Remus, and Mr Evans was pleased to see he was giving Sirius The Look.

"What? First rule of marauding _deny _everything"

"Look why don't we just tell him the truth" said Remus, and Mr Evans dislike for the boy decreased, though of course only slightly; Lupin _was_ after all still a Marauder.

"Yes, _yes_ please for goodness sake just tell me the truth!"

"Well, what about?" Asked Peter

"What abo…" Mr Evans shook his head; "is that friend of yours dating my daughter?"

The marauders, to Mr Evans astonishment laughed. Actually laughed! The audacity of them!

"James ...dating Lily?" hiccoughed Peter

"That's a good one, really" Smirked Sirius.

"I am _not_ blind ok! I can see, very well that James is not _just_ friends with Lily. Now I demand you tell me the truth!" He knew what they were doing, it was obvious really; they were trying to make him believe it was all in his head, throw him off the scent, well it wasn't working. Not at all.

"You really think...oh this is great. _I am a genius_" announced Sirius

"Hey! It was my idea- I'm the genius here" Mr Evans could not help the feeling of betrayal he felt at Remus words, he had he was sad to admit began to and he shuddered to admit it, like the boy. It was evidence he thought, no matter how…likeable a teenage boy may seem at the end of the day they were all the same; treacherous.

"I…I contributed too!"

"_Sure_ you did, wormtail"

Wormtail, looked ready to reply but Mr Evans had had enough: "Will someone tell me what the bleeding hell is going on?"

The marauders all talked to look at him, it looked as though they had forgotten he was in the same room; despicable.

After exchanging glances, which of course only incensed Mr Evans even more they finally began to speak.

"Would you like to do the honours, Moony?" Asked Sirius

"Indeed, I would Padfoot" Replied Remus and Mr Evans annoyed at having to be kept waiting, and sick of the stupid nicknames, stupid Marauders and stupid…everything growled.

Remus merely smiled though, apparently unfazed by the fact that Mr Evans looked ready to throttle him; "You see Mr Evans" he began, "we, that is Sirius, Peter and myself noticed something this year, in fact the whole student population noticed it…"

"Not to mention the faculty" Put in Sirius, while Mr Evans frowned in confusion.

"Yes" continued Remus; "Everyone in fact, who knew Lily and James noticed something"

Mr Evans leaned forward unconsciously.

"And what we noticed lead us to the same conclusion as you"

Mr Evans frowned; "What…"

"We came to the conclusion that our dear friend James was dating your beautiful daughter Lily"

"Aha! So they are dating!"

The boys shook their heads and Mr Evans scoffed; if even the teachers, people he deemed to be intelligent and wise in the matters concerning teenagers could see that the nincompoop Potter was dating Lily then of course it would be trued.

"For once" began Sirius "we were…"he grimaced "wrong"

"Yeah, we really thought we had them"

Remus nodded at Peters words; "we were angry even, our best friend hiding his relationship from us"

"So naturally we investigated" Said Sirius

"For weeks, we used our…resources to spy on them but…"

"no luck" finished Peter; "they really weren't dating"

Sirius shook his head; "It was worse, they still acted in that sick way" he shuddered; "you've seen them, but the thing is they're completely oblivious!"

"Look" said Mr Evans; "None of this is making sense! I will not let you trick me, do you hear me? I'll…"

Remus sighed; "Mr Evans, we_ know_ James and he is madly in love with her"

"It's quite sickening actually" put in Sirius, only to be ignored

"Thing is he's scared to tell her"

Peter nodded; "He says it'll screw everything up"

"And Lily well, she likes him, loves him" (Mr Evans made a funny noise in his throat at this) "but thing is…"

"She's too bloody dumb to see it"

"Excuse me! That is my daughter you're talking about! How dare…"

Again though, poor Mr Evans was cut off, in the back of his mind he realised this was supposed to be him giving the Marauders a hard time, not the other way around.

"Mr Evans, you said it yourself they act like…"

"Like a love sick couple" shuddered Sirius, just as the sound of laugher drifted from the kitchen. Curious the three boys and Mr Evans walked to the door, each peering around the edge and to the direction of the noise. What Mr Evans saw made his scrambled eggs churn unpleasantly in his stomach; Lily was standing quite close to James and was currently trying to wipe off the soap that had somehow got on to his forehead; she was laughing madly (at what Mr Evans did not know) as she tipped toed trying to reach…

Shuddering Mr Evans drew back, in all honesty the situation he realised could have been worse, he could have found them doing…that…or. He shivered, yes, there were worst things he could have seen, and he realised it really had been quite innocent. He frowned to himself, according to the Marauders, James and Lily were not yet dating, they were too scared or too whatever, but the point was they were _not_ dating, at least not yet, which meant that he had an easier job.

Rather than try to break up the couple, which he had to admit, could have proved difficult if not impossible, now all he had to do was nip this "_budding romance_" before it could blossom. He smiled, that at least would not be too hard.

When the Marauders had finally sat down, Mr Evans cleared his throat; "so what you three boys are saying, is that those two" he nodded towards the door; "are in love but…oblivious"

The three boys nodded fervently.

"Right" he sighed dramatically, "so now, may ask what that plan you mentioned last night was?"

Sirius opened his mouth; "There was no…"

Remus hit him on the head, before smiling at Mr Evans; "Sir, Lily speaks about you a lot, at school"

"Yeah she misses you" smiled Peter

"And well, we got the impression that…you are the only person she'd listen to"

"She's stubborn as hell" said Sirius "And none of us can get her to see sense, or James for that matter" he sighed.

"Not that we haven't tried" smirked Peter

"Yup, locked them in a broom closet…"

"Found them two hours later playing exploding snap"

Sirius shook his head; "Tried to make Lily jealous but then James ditched the girl we got for him"

"We tried truth serums; end up giving it to the wrong person…"

Peter shuddered; "that was a bad one"

"So yeah, back to the point, we tried to get them together but _everything_ failed and so I …"

Sirius coughed;

"OK, _**we**_ came up with this idea, like I said, Lily listens to you, more than anyone so we" he coughed; "we thought…_youcouldmakeherseesense_"

"What?" Asked Mr Evans, eyebrows furrowed in confusion- Remus had spoken so fast he had hardly heard a word.

"He said we thought _you could make her see sense"_

Mr Evans stared.

"You love her right?" asked Peter; "So then you'd help her find her love"

For a minute Mr Evans merely stared at the three boys in front of him, from Remus who was fidgeting, to the smirking Sirius and finally the smiling Peter.

Were they really that stupid?

And then he laughed, and he laughed. Overcome at the absurdity of the boys; why had he been so worried? These boys, despite being teenagers were obviously some of the dimmest boys alive; which father he thought would actually set their daughter up? He laughed some more, enjoying the bewildered looks on the Marauders face, he had not laughed so much since old Smithy had accidently dyed his hair pink.

"Urmm, Mr Evans…" Started Remus.

"He's bonkers" said Peter, staring eyes wide at the laughing Mr Evans

Finally, after the laughter subsided Mr Evans stared at the boys in front of him; "Did you seriously think I would help you make my daughter like your_ idiot_ of a friend?"

The marauders reacted instantaneously;

"_He is not an idiot…most of the time"_

"_She already LIKES him"_

"_Why wouldn't you help?"_

Mr Evans sniggered; "Well, sorry boys I can't, sorry _won't_ help you"

"B…but…even you said it- they look like a couple, they obviously love each other"

"Look I told you before, _I don't like you_" he looked them each in the eye; "_any_ of you and as far as I am concerned the longer Lily is single the better" he beamed at the boys. "Right, now that we have that sorted, there's just one more thing- _don't_ you try anything, because believe me I _will_ find out"

And with that he stood up to make his way to the door only to be blocked unceremoniously by Sirius; "Not so fast Mr Evans" Mr Evans glared at the boy; "Listen, son, I'm twice the size of you so why don't you just move?"

Sirius smirked and nodded towards Remus who had Mr Evans was shocked to see his wand out; "You woudn't" he said.

"Wouldn't I?" Asked Remus, twirling his wand in his hand. "What do you say Wormtail, would I?"

Peter, rubbed his chin thoughtfully as Mr Evans gulped; "Well," said Peter; "I reckon you would- there's always the memory charm afterwards right?"

"Exactly my thoughts" agreed Remus, looking Mr Evans directly in the eye.

Mr Evans shuddered, anger and he had to admit_ fear_ bubbling within him; he could take the boys on any day; man vs boy but….against magic? He had no chance. He scowled at Sirius and slowly made his way back to his armchair, eyes never leaving Remus.

He didn't shiver though, or wring his hands in nervous surrender, no, he was John Evans and despite the fact his heart was in his mouth, and his palms were sticky he sat upright, hands on knees and eyed the three boys in front of him.

Sirius was naturally smirking, Peter was rubbing his hands excitedly and even Remus (who had gone from Mr Evans favourite too most detested Marauder in a matter of minutes) was making himself comfortable on the sofa.

"We" he began "are just going to ask you some questions"

Sirius nodded; "And then you're free to go- it's your house after all" he laughed.

"Yeah, whatever your decision- we won't mind just answer our questions"

Mr Evans grit his teeth together, it was not hard to see that the Marauders were skilled in the art of manipulation.

"Right, so do you love your daughter?" Asked Sirius

"What?" said Mr Evans outraged; "Of course I love Lily!"

"And let's see… what makes you happy is her happiness, correct?"

Mr Evans nodded tightly; if these boys were insinuating he didn't care for Lily…

"and therefore it's seem logical to reason, you would do anything to make her happy?"

Mr Evans did not reply, his mind was working fast, the Marauders may have been clever but he, he was bloody Einstein compared to them and at that present moment the neurons in Mr Evans brain were firing faster than ever- it was after all a matter of his daughters safety- at least that was the way he saw it.

"You know what makes Lily happy Mr Evans?"

"James" Sirius said; "James makes Lily happy! And _she_ makes him happy" he smiled; "I'm sick of seeing James mope about our dorm, or Lily frown every time he talks to Samantha Nikes or whoever!"

"And since, you quite clearly care for Lily and obviously want her to be happy, you have no choice but to do as we say"

"Well said Wormtail, so Mr Evans we take it you'll be helping us in our plan, as a good, caring father of course?"

Mr Evans appraised the three boys in front of them, before clearing his throat; "Ok, ok…you're right James does make Lily happy, and …" he sighed; "it's just I'm her dad- no dad likes to admit someone else can make their little girl happy ...but…I guess, I guess I'll help you but _not_ for you" he added sternly "but for Lily"

Sirius and Peter whooped, and Mr Evans watched as they each high fived in victory;

"Well then" said Sirius; "Let's start planning!"

Mr Evans smiled and nodded, the Marauders it seemed were ecstatic, they were also he thought the most stupid breed of teenagers in the world. He smirked, the Marauders may have thought they had an ally; they may have been congratulating themselves at ordering an older man around, what they didn't know however was that Mr Evans had no intention of following any such plan. He had merely followed an age old tactic- destroy from the inside…

**A/N: This chapter gave me hell, I was suffering from a serious case of writes block, and it's still not perfect but I hope you enjoy it. Please review and let me know what you think! And a big, big thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter, or favourited/alerted :D**


	6. Of Mischief and Misery

Of Mischief and Misery

In which there is mischief, plans and a fight (or two)

Mr Evans had never been a planner- it just _wasn't_ what he did. Planning was in his mind a time waster; he hadn't planned on asking Agnes to marry him, he didn't plan on the _where_ and the _whens _and _hows_ when he decided to open a garage and he certainly did not plan for his wedding speech. All in all this lack of planning had not always worked to Mr Evans favour; Agnes had stared wide eyed outside the chippy as he said _So… marry me?,_ the lack of planning for his garage had led to many start- ups and shut -downs and an angry father-in-law, his wedding speech had (though given whilst he was only _slightly _drunk) resulted in him not only proclaiming his love for his wife but insulting quite a lot of people too.

No, Mr Evans did not plan and it did not serve him well.

And so one would naturally expect that with a situation regarding his dear daughter he would at least, this once plan.

And he did. To an extent that is.

You see, his plan was to…well, to rely on the Marauders utter stupidity.

He would and did disregard any plan that Sirius or Remus made that may have had a chance of succeeding but when Peter Pettigrew opened his mouth Mr Evans had beamed. He had beamed and clapped Peter on the back; he had ignored the dubious looks on the other two boys' faces and had expressed, with much vigour his approval.

The Marauders had no choice but to agree to it.

And so it was that on Christmas Eve in his living room, Mr John Evans shook hands with Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew on the plan of a century.

* * *

><p>The door swung open and the three boys jumped as Lily walked in; "You lot still aren't dressed?" she asked hands on hips.<p>

The boys and Mr Evans looked down at themselves, surprised it seemed to find they were still in their pyjamas. "I'm going first!" announced Sirius making his way towards the door, only to be stopped by Lily; "No way- you go last, otherwise these lot are going to be waiting all day" Sirius frowned whilst Remus got up stretching; "Good call Lily" he said smiling before walking out on the door past an indignant Sirius.

Mr Evans in his armchair frowned; it was the last time he checked _his _house; therefore it should have been _him_ to use the bathroom first not Remus Bloody Lupin. But then again they would be gone soon- it would be no use he thought, getting himself worked up about it all now. The plan (however half formed it may have been) really was quite brilliant after all, which meant his time with the Marauders was fortunately drawing towards a close. And with that in mind Mr Evans reached for the remote-_ah! He smiled The Muppets…_

Approximately two hours later and all the inhabitants of 64 Mills crescent were (finally) dressed and ready. Mr Evans having had his bath and worn some of his best clothes (it was a day of celebration after all) now sat in the living room, the Daily Mail in his hands. He was alternating between reading, or pretending to read and looking out through the windows. Lily and the Marauders had you see decided that the weather called for a snow fight and so were now outside laughing ridiculously loudly( or in Lily's case sweetly) and throwing snow at each other. Mr Evans did not altogether disapprove of snow fights, he had in his youth had many himself and remembered taking both Lily and Petunia out in to the snow but this snow fight was of course with the Marauders and so it seemed necessary for him to spy (or as he would say when Lily asked _enjoy the view_.)

He laughed out loud when Lupin slipped backwards and smirked when Lily got Black right in the face- _that's my girl_ he thought, before frowning as Potter grabbed her from behind. He was just about to stand up and walk right out there himself when Lily being his beautiful, clever, _genius_ of a daughter managed to take advantage of the situation and give Potter a mouthful of snow too.

Mr Evans had never been prouder.

The next hour was for Mr Evans quite slow- he was he had to admit anxious for the plan to be put into action, yet the clock on the wall seemed determined to taunt him; the second hand seemingly taking minutes to move whilst the minute hand seemed to drag into hours. It was most frustrating, even more so when Black smirked at Lupin after deliberately pushing Lily into James- that boy had to be the most dangerous, most stupid, most…. _everything negative_ in the world.

Finally, however the hour was up and apparently tired of being pushed, shoved and hit with snow the Marauders along with Lily headed back in to the house.

It was time.

Mr Evans smiled to himself barely able to contain his excitement, it was a sign he thought that he was doing the right thing when Lily trudged up the stairs to get changed.

There would be no need for an excuse now.

The four boys entered the room collapsing on the sofa and in Peter's case the floor- Mr Evans sent Black a significant look, which he returned before sending Lupin his own significant look while James oblivious stretched.

"I'm hungry" he announced.

Peter nodded his agreement.

"I'm_ bored_" said Sirius

James frowned; "Bored? Blimey Padfoot- we've been in the snow for over an hour!"

"I know" sighed Sirius (far too theatrically for Mr Evans liking); "And it was fun but that was _then_ and now _I'm bored_."

James rolled his eyes at his friend; "On the tele…" he frowned; "teleee… what's it Moony?"

"Television Prongs" sighed Remus, whilst subtly elbowing Sirius.

"Yeah that's it- why don't you on the _tel-e-vision_" said James stressing each syllable.

"But I don't want to on it" moaned Sirius; "Really Prongs you said this holiday would be, and I quote; _'the best time we ever had'_- this is _not _the best time I have ever had!"

James glared at his friend and sent an apologetic look towards Mr Evans; "I'm sorry sir, Sirius is just an immature brat with…"

"Why don't you go out James" cut in Mr Evans, trying to force his voice into a polite _I don't want to kill you _tone.

"But…"

Mr Evans smiled; "Look James, you and your friends are young- you shouldn't be stuck in the house like this, go out, explore Cokeworth...and erm_ have fun_."

James frowned again; "Ok, I'll just go call Lily then…" and he started to stand up.

"NO!" cried Peter and Mr Evans shook his head, that boy may as well have put a sign on the top of his head announcing the plan. It was lucky then, he thought that James Potter was such an idiotic target, if it had been him _he_ would have most certainly realised something was wrong.

As it was James Potter was suspicious and he turned to look at his friend; "And why not Peter?" he asked in a quiet, dangerous voice.

Peter shrugged, gave a muffled reply and turned to examine the carpet. _Pathetic._

James started to move towards the door again when Sirius spoke up; "We can't take Lily – I mean, I... I wanted to go see that…guy…about... about my motorbike"

James frowned; "What guy? I thought you said…"

"He owled me, said we could go see it today but Lily" he cleared his throat; "I don't think Lily would approve"

James in quite a comical fashion, opened his mouth, closed it, stared wide eyed at his best friend before turning to Mr Evans. It was clear thought Mr Evans that James did not think he would approve any more of a motorbike than his daughter. And he was right- to an extent. Mr Evans had you see had what one might call _a phase_ in his youth- a phase that included motorbikes, drinking and a lot of other things he severely claimed to hate in his middle age.

Not that anybody needed to know about that.

Mr Evans smiled at the still staring James; "Its fine- you boys go and do what you have to. I've been wanting to spend some time with Lily anyway"

James scratched his head; "Ok, well let me just tell her we're going…"

"There's no need" said Mr Evans standing up; "I'll tell Lily- you boys get going"

The others stood up too and along with Mr Evans shepherded James into the hallway; "Ok then! Let's get going!" This was naturally Sirius and Mr Evans did his best to hide his scowl at the boys' antics, the next few moments however brought him much joy.

The reason for this was due to the fact that these moments consisted of James being proded, shoved, and generally not being allowed to get a word in sideways- and naturally the boys' discomfort was a great source of happiness to Mr Evans who jovially pushed him out the door and shut it just as James shouted; _"We won't be late!"_

And with that Mr Evans returned to his armchair, letting his body sink into the sofa and the happiness sink into his heart; this was it, the plan had been initiated and yes maybe it wasn't even a real plan because well, a lot depended on chance and so forth but… there was action and yes, it may have been hazy but hazy was good. Hazy meant improvisation, hazy meant he could and would act according to the demands of the situation… and he thought hazy would get him what he wanted…

Just then the door was pushed open and in came Lily, Mr Evans beamed.

"Did …" she was he noticed out of breath; "did someone go out?"

Mr Evans picked up his newspaper; "Oh yeah- the boys decided to go …" he shifted "explore"

"Explore?" asked Lily incredulously and for good reason- Cokeworth was and always had been a very… _boring_ place. Neither a mainstream city or a busy town, it was a place often forgotton about not only by the tourists but by the local government; the park Lily had played on in her childhood for example was now left with broken swings and overgrown grass and the most interesting thing, if it could be called interesting were the old Mills.

Mr Evans hid his face behind his Daily Mail and mumbled incoherently; "Well, where have they gone?" demanded Lily

Mr Evans shrugged and opened his newspaper; "Dad!" Oh, this was going to be fun he thought as he listened to the irritation in his daughters voice.

_"Dad!"_ Mr Evans made a show of putting his newspaper down and raised an eyebrow; "what is it Lily?" he asked, thinking he pulled the _exasperated father tone_ off really rather well.

_"Did they say where they were going?" _ She had her hands on her hips now and Mr Evans hid a smirk; it wasn't his plan to _aggravate _his daughter (he was after all doing everything for her betterment) but, well… _it was fun._

Mr Evans shifted in his seat; "might have- I wasn't listening- here Lily dear you wouldn't mind fixing me a sandwich would you?" He gave her sheepish smile.

"_But where..."_

"I'm sure they'll be along soon Lily"

She sighed and got up; "I'll make some for them too in that case, they couldn't have gone far right?"

Mr Evans opened his mouth to argue before closing it rapidly- he would he realised have to be careful not to fall into his own trap.

**One sandwich and two glasses of coke later…**

Mr Evans wiped his mouth; "Thanks Lils that was great" he said smiling at her.

_This_ he thought was the way things ought to be; just him and his daughter enjoying some quality time together- no dangerous boys pulling the _lets stretch and put an arm around the girl routine,_ no one eating _his _Victoria sponge, no ridiculous arm wrestles… he sighed contently- no raving, mad lunatics.

Lily however did not seem to be thinking on the same lines as her father; instead she had been glancing so often at the clock it looked rather as though she had a particularly bad twitch. Rather than deter Mr Evans however, his daughters concern of the four boys proved (in his mind at least) that he was doing the right thing; he had known she was far too attached to the hooligans and he had been proved right- he really was doing what was best for her.

**Two yawns and three Christmas songs later…**

"It's just... they're the Marauders" Lily said and Mr Evans could not help the pang of annoyance he felt at the fact that his daughter _had still not let it go_; "and well trouble finds them, no they _are_ trouble" she shook her head; "who knows what they're doing out there and..." She gasped and Mr Evans looked up concernedly; "Lily?"

"_Snape"_ she said and Mr Evans frowned; she wasn't thinking of calling that boy round now was she?

_"Snape?"_

"Yes Snape. What if... What if the Marauders and he meet, what if they..."

She stood up; "I have to go... I have to go look for them before..."

Mr Evans sighed, Lily he decided thought too much- why oh why could she not just sit down and enjoy spending Christmas eve with her father? Kids these days he thought, just no concern for their parents anymore.

"_No!_ They're not gone to meet Snape and I doubt they will...I think... I think they're gone to Diagon alley or the likes"

Lily stared wide eyed; "they went to Diagon Alley? Well why didn't you say?" Then after a pause "Why didn't they tell me?"

Mr Evans grunted and looked away from his daughter; "pass us the remote will you flower?"

"What do you know?" Lily asked eyes narrowed.

"N…nothing Lily, sit down. Really does it look like they'd tell me? They're you're friends now pass ..."

_"Dad!"_

Mr Evans sighed and fidgeted in his seat; "I honestly don't know Lily" he looked at her; "they were talking, whispering and then that Peter looked quite excited, like he could wet himself" Lily frowned disapprovingly; "and then Potter announced they were off, and then Black patted him on the back and... Oh, _I don't know_ -there was whistling and jokes and I told them you wouldn't be long but they said it was ok because _they _wouldn't be long and then, well, they left" he paused; "look I know how much you wanted to spend time with them but now you get to spend some time with your old dad. I'm not that bad am I?"

**One visit from Old Joe and a news round later…**

Lily came into the room and Mr Evans looked up smiling; "Managed to send all your letters of then?"

She smiled and nodded before collapsing on to the sofa; "I wonder where…"

She cut off at the look her father gave her.

**Much later…**

"_Four hours"_

Mr Evans said nothing.

"_Four hours and they're still not back"_

…

"What if they're lost?"

"What if…"

And then Mr Evans was forced to listen to a series of _What ifs?_ Along with a lot; _I hope they're haven't gone and done this or thats_ And he was also forced to admit that had it been anyone other than Lily he would have told them to _shut the bloody hell up_, or if it had been Lily worrying about anyone else he would have told her to _"please not worry and sit down",_ but since it was Lily worrying about the_ Marauders_, Mr Evans said nothing- he could not trust that his mouth wouldn't say _"good riddance to bad rubbish"_ or something more colourful and so instead Mr Evans sat with his mouth shut, gaining comfort that very soon Lily's_ love-but-not-dating-relationship_ with James Potter would end.

**Much, much later...**

Lily had gone from annoyance at not being included in the Marauders plans to corncerened for their well being. Now however she was past the _I hope they're ok_ stage and had gone to something much, much worse; anger.

Whilst Mr Evans watched amused Lily repeatedly cursed the boys under her breath; he knew of course that as a father he should perhaps reprimand her for her language (even if he could barely hear it) but it was the Marauders she was cursing so, well he would be a hypocrite since he too was saying the same (and worse) of the Marauders in his own head.

"I can't bloody believe…" Lily was seething. Her face red and her hair wild; "It's going on to nine- nine at _night._ Oh Merlin, I am going to kill James Potter"

And Mr Evans could not help but smirk at the thought of his daughter teaching Potter a lesson; _that_ would be something worth watching...

When ten o'clock came and went Lily was a mess; a mess of anger and worry and disbelief, in fact even Mr Evans couldn't help the feeling that seemed to be creeping up on him- a feeling that tried his best to ignore. Yes, he had told them to go, yes, he had told them to come back late but…_this late?_

He squirmed uncomfortably, say or think what he might the fact remained that he did not want to have to answer to the parents of the four boys if they just did not turn up.

But then they were the_ Marauders_ so surely they could look after themselves. Probably out causing havoc he thought. Yes, that was it- the four boys were out gallivanting somewhere or the other causing misery to some poor souls. Or maybe they were drunk.

He scratched his head thoughtfully; maybe they were out taking drugs…

**The return of the Marauders or the creeping up of misery…**

It was past eleven when the sound of raucous laughter hit Mr Evans ears, he turned and looked at Lily who stared back at him. He opened his mouth; "do you think it's…"

But he had barely finished the sentence when the door bell rang, he glanced at Lily but she studiously avoided his gaze and sighing Mr Evans made his way to the door.

Opening it he found himself faced with the four boys- it was worse than the first time he had saw them on his door step. At least then they had vaguely resembled human beings, this time however Sirius Black looked exceptionally drunk, Remus Lupin had a bruised cheek, Peter Pettigrew looked like he could at any moment throw up and as for James Potter, well he was being supported by Lupin and Pettigrew, sported a rather brilliant black eye and looked very much in pain.

It was thought Mr Evans- perfect. Absolutely blooming perfect, he had of course told the boys to come back late, he had not however counted on them getting into a such a state of disarray- not that he was complaining of course.  
>The Marauders had after all just aided Mr Evans grand plan.<p>

And with that thought Mr Evans put on his best, most sympathetic face on and ushered the boys in; Sirius giggled slightly and at that Mr Evans could not help but smirk, James on the other winced as he walked and if Mr Evans was in the mood to be honest, he would admit that made his smirk even bigger.

Nothing however could compete with the bliss, the joy,_ the utter happiness_ he felt when the boys entered the living room and Lily sitting on the sofa caught sight of them.

For a moment, there was silence- the boys having noticed Lilys stony face stopped their giggling, or whining and stood mouths shut waiting for the storm that would inevitably be coming.

"Where the hell have you been?" her voice was quiet, a danger sign thought Mr Evans (who was desperately trying to hide his smile)

Remus opened his mouth; "We... we just thought we'd go…erm out for a bit and then Sirius got drunk and Peter went…"

_"It's quarter to twelve!"_

"Come on Lils, it's no big deal now why don't you sort this eye out for me eh?" But this evidently was the wrong thing to say as James found a second later.

"No big deal? No big deal? I have been worried sick, I thought…"

"Well, what the hell for? We're not bloody kids Evans"

Mr Evans could have skipped, James it seemed was slightly intoxicated and that added with his wounds meant that his mouth seemed to have taken over his brain- it was _brilliant._

Lily glared at him before turning to Remus; "So will you please tell me where you have been?"

But James seemed to want Lily's attention on him and not his friend; "We went" he started; "We went…hey! Hey Lily I'm talking to you…we went to do something very important" he nodded solemnly before gicing her a drunken smile, Lily however did not seem amused; "and that very important work included you getting a black eye and completely pissed"

"Who you talking about? I'm not pissed" he shook his vigorously; "And this, this…" he pointed to his black eye; "this I got from…from defending someones honour" he nodded; "it was very noble, very…"

"Yes, I'm sure it was very noble" said Lily, her voice icy before turning around to leave the room.

"Oh don't go!" called James; "I'm sorry…Lily, Lily!" but Mr Evans watched with great satisfaction as his daughter turned and left the room. In all honesty he was quite surprised that she had not stayed longer to scream, and shout at Potter and the rest. It was decidedly _unLily_ like behaviour and Mr Evans could not help but frown at it.

With one last glance at the four boys who had now collapsed onto the sofa Mr Evans made his way up to his daughters room.

He made sure to knock before entering, in the back of his mind a vague memory of him opening a door, Petunia screaming and then hitting him on the head with her hair dryer surfaced. No, he did not want a repeat of _that._

"Go away Potter!" he heard Lily growl- good she didn't want to see the lunatic.

"It's not Potter"

Lily opened the door; "Dad? What are you doing here?" she sounded tired, exasperated and Mr Evans nearly wished that none of this had happened. Nearly.

"Just came to check on my little girl" he said walking in to the room after her, a room filled with childhood memories; reading her bed time stories, finding her with books under the cover reading by wand light…

"I'm sorry"

He looked up shocked; "Sorry? For what?"

She sighed; "For the Marauders- they're not normally, I mean they were …prats today" she started pacing; "I mean what was so important that…"

She shook her head; "If they didn't want to come here for Christmas, they should have just…"

Mr Evans watched his daughter pace up and down and up and down before finally speaking; "Don't give them too much of a hard time" he said sitting down on the edge of her bed.

"Excuse me? This is coming from you, who…"

Mr Evans shook his head; "What the boys did was wrong. Going of without telling you, getting into fights, getting drunk… but" he paused and looked at Lily- this was it; "I lied this morning when I told you they hadn't told me where they were going"

Lily opened her mouth but Mr Evans held up a hand; "They told me…James rather told me he had, well he had a date"

Lily stared at her father in shock; "James?" she frowned "No, it must have been Sirius James hasn't been on a date in…in months"

"According to Sirius he's been seeing _this girl_ for months" Lily looked up; "Anyway, it was a double date today; Sirius and James- the other two wanted to go to Diagon Ally…and the fight well, from what I've just heard someone made a pass at one of the girls… Sarah I think her name was? Yeah and well, you know how it is."

Lily said nothing and Mr Evans continued; "So you know, don't be too hard on them, in love everyone becomes a bit of a prat- I know I was" he smiled at his daughter but Lily was no longer looking at him, instead his daughter sat on her bed staring at the carpet and somewhere deep in Mr Evans heart he felt a pang of something called regret.

Not that he realised what it was that he was feeling.

"Why…why didn't he…I mean why didn't _they _tell me?" she gave a shaky laugh; "I mean it's not as though I'm his girlfriend… I wouldn't…"

Mr Evans shrugged his shoulders; "Love- it's mysterious" he said and then giving Lily a kiss on her forehead he made his way across the room; "Get a good nights sleep- it's Christmas tomorrow"

Lily did not look up and Mr Evans left the room wandering why on earth he did not feel as jubilant as he expected, in the end he put it down to the fact that Lily was his daughter and that very moment she was he gathered quite upset, and so naturally as a father he felt for her (even if he didn't understand her pain), that was it right? Natural fatherly instincts, yes that's what it was- nothing else.

* * *

><p><strong>A night of misery later...<strong>

Christmas Day had once saw Lily waking up before dawn, running up to the tree and ravaging through her presents. Even on the Christmases spent at Hogwarts she woke as early as possible, this particular Christmas was however different. Mr Evans was surprisingly, the first to wake on this 25th of December after having spent the night in his own bed- he had you see realised that the danger of midnight meetings between his daughter and the four _imbeciles_ was for the moment at bay and so the sending the Marauders into the tents he himself had enjoyed a quite brilliant sleep in his own bed.

Now at half past eight he realised he was the only one in the house awake- a peek into Lily's room showed her fast asleep and a more noisy peek into the tents showed the boys too were still asleep. Noting this Mr Evans made himself a cuppa before realising quite suddenly that they did not this year have a tree. The realisation so sudden as it was meant he did not hear the whine of the kettle, instead Mr Evans stood mouth open and shocked. _What would Agnes say?_

Then it hit him- he would decorate the tree and surprise Lily and so with his new found enthusiasm he made his way up the stairs two at a time and in to the accurately named Dump room. It was past nine when he finally found tinsel and the like in a box aptly named _Christmas Decorations_. It had taken him so long not only because of the amount of rubbish in the room, but because despite his best efforts Mr Evans was repeatedly distracted;

_Was that really his old school books?_

_And then there were the motor bike posters (he had had a bit of obsession)_

_Old love letters he had sent to Agnes…_

When he had however finally located the box of decorations and trudged down the stairs Mr Evans was encountered with another problem; he did not have a tree…

For a moment he paused, in awe (or shock) of his own utter stupidity- because even he had to admit it was utterly stupid. Sighing Mr Evans sat himself down on his armchair; all he wanted was for things to be perfect for Lily and yet…he shook his head, he had ruined her relationship, friendship whatever it was with James( because he knew his daughter, and he knew she hated being lied to so there was no question of her forgiving the boy) and it was he knew for her own good but…why did he have this feeling of…

He shook himself, he was being stupid. He had done the right thing, and Lily wouldn't worry about a god damn tree and if she did want one well then he would go out and look for one.

Satisfied Mr Evans decided it was time to get dressed and began to once more make his way upstairs.

By the time Mr Evans was showered and dressed in as many layers as possible (it was quite a cold Christmas morning) it was already past ten and the teenage occupants of the house were still not awake. Sighing Mr Evans decided he would for once make breakfast, armed and ready he made his way down the stairs ready to conquer the kitchen.

Mr Evans breakfast- making happened to coincide with the arrival of the Marauders into the kitchen; eyes bloodshot Sirius Black made his way over to the sink and grabbing a glass filled it with water- Mr Evans did not deny that this image made him smile. _Serves him right_ he thought.

James Potter, unfortunately for Mr Evans looked much better than his best friend, despite that is having a haggard, tired sort of look about him.

Remus Lupin looked like, well, Remus Lupin- _did that boy ever get enough sleep?_ Wondered Mr Evans, once again taking in the dark circles around Lupins eyes.

In fact Peter Pettigrew was the only one of the boys that did not seem overcome by tiredness, a hangover, or an illness of any kind.

"G'morning" yawned Remus.

Mr Evans frowned; "You boys sleep ok?"

Remus, James and Peter all nodded, Sirius however opened his but was (much to Mr Evans amusement) cut off by both Remus and James elbowing. Sirius scowled and James cleared his throat; "Erm Mr Evans, theres something I, that is _we_ wanted to say"

Mr Evans looked up; "Oh?"

James shifted uncomfortably; "We're sorry, for yesterday- going out like that, coming back late, drunk…We're sorry"

Mr Evans frowned at the boy, he could not honestly say he was angry at James or the others for their antics- they had afterall helped him. Nevertheless he had no qualms hiding this particular fact from the boys; "I'm not going to lie James, I was…disappointed and shocked to be honest, that friends of Lily, friends who she speaks very highly of" here he gave James a stern look; "could act so irresponsibly"

James gulped; "I know Mr Evans, I know it was irresponsible, stupid even and I am, we are sorry"

Remus nodded vigorously and Peter managed to stammer; "Yeah, sorry" before looking down. It took Sirius another elbowing before he spoke; "Right, yesterday- sorry Mr E"

Mr Evans nodded; "Ok, well why don't you boys go get yourselves ready eh?"

When the boys were finally ready, and Mr Evans had thrown away the burnt scrambled eggs and just finished making a new batch, as well as a big load of sausages Lily finally made her appearance.

The boys were sat at the kitchen table and their quiet chatter fell silent at her entrance; "Merry Christmas Lily" said Mr Evans getting up to give his daughter a hug.

Lily forced a smile; "Merry Christmas dad" she sighed- she was he noticed still in her pyjamas, her red hair in a messy bun.

"Merry Christmas Lil…" but her glare cut Sirius festive greeting off.

Mr Evans hid his smirk, and watched as James tried and failed to make eye contact with his daughter before frowning as he realised the only space for Lily on the table was directly opposite Potter.

Lily didn't seem too happy about this fact either (a fact that made Mr Evans insides do summersaults); "Can you pass the sausages Peter" she asked.

Remus who had been mid-way through a sentence fell silent, and Peter dropped his fork; "M…Me?"

Lily nodded curtly and Peter cleared his throat; "C…can you pass the sausages Prongs?" he asked.

James who was now glaring at Lily handed the plate to Peter, Mr Evans could have danced, in the snow, with his shorts on… Lily and James were obviously at odds were each other and it was he thought all due to him. Giving himself a mental pat on the back, Mr Evans picked up his fork once more, his fork was just an inch away from his mouth before James Bloody Potter addressed Lily and Mr Evans curious set his fork down once more (it would not do he thought to choke out of shock).

"Lily I…"

"Can I have the salt Remus?"

Remus looked between his friend and Lily; "erm sure?"

"Lily I…"

"These eggs are delicious dad, you're really getting the hand of it…"

"Thanks flower" smiled Mr Evans.

"Look, will you at least listen to me?"

"Theres nothing to listen to" said Lily, putting a fork of scrambled eggs into her mouth.

"Yes, yes there is! I'm sorry for last night, I was a git ok? It was daft, stupid coming so late."

"Got that right"

James sighed; "Please Lily just listen ok? Padfoot wanted his motorbike so we went to…"

"Oh for Merlins sakes James- enough is enough!" Lily stood up, pushing her chair back; "just stop…stop lying!"

James stood up and Mr Evans head turned (rather comically) between his daughter and the mongoose Potter, hopefully this would end the ridiculous... _relationship._

"Lying! It's the truth! Ask Remus, or Sirius or your own dad" James turned to Mr Evans, evidently looking for support, Mr Evans however stared resolutely down at his half full plate.

"Don't you dare bring him into this Potter! If you wanted to go snog some slag all you had to do was say- I'm not…I'm not your…babysitter!"

"Snog? What the hell are you talking about Evans?"

Mr Evans coughed loudly, whilst Sirius and Remus exchanged glances and turned to look at him suspiciously. Peter Pettigrew meanwhile merely donned a thoroughly confused expression.

"Oh don't give me that Potter- I know ok, I know and I don't bloody care- so you can go snog Sarah or whoever it is…"

"Sarah? Really Evans are you blind? I thought you were supposed to be the top of our year not a bloody fool!"

"Great so now_ I'm_ the fool?"

James opened his mouth to reply, his face red but Lily once again beat him to it; "You know what I don't give a shit!"

_"Lily_" Mr Evans thought it was maybe, possibly time to intervene.

Lily however was not listening, pushing her hair back she stormed out of the kitchen and Mr Evans could hear the thud, thud_ thud_ of her feet on the stairs. For a second there was silence before James swore and made his own way out the kitchen; it wasn't long before Mr Evans heard a louder _thud_ of his front door closing.

The three Marauders left sat staring at him, before Peter Pettigrew, small, stuttering Peter Pettigrew spoke; _"But…but what happened to the plan?"_

* * *

><p><strong>24 hours (more or less) ago...<strong>

"How…how about we make Lily worried?"

"Shut up Wormy"

"_Don't call me that!"_

"No, no Peter what was that?" asked Mr Evans leaning forward.

"Make Lily worried- you know, we'll kidnap James"

The others raised their eyebrows; "Ok, not kidnap, just take him out till late, really late and then Lily'll be all scared, then Mr Evans you can be a good dad and you know talk to her and ask her why she's scared and then…"

"and then I'll make her realise her undying love for your friend"

Peter nodded excitedly; "exactly"

Sirius and Remus changed incredulous looks; "really? You don't thinks it's…"

"utter rubbish!"

_"Padfoot!"_

"I think" said Mr Evans "that it's perfect- well done Peter, I knew there was a reason I liked you" Peter flushed and Sirius rolled his eyes.

"But…" began Remus; "I don't think…"

"Who is Lily's father?" asked Mr Evans staring directly at Remus.

"Erm you sir"

"Right and so therefore I know my daughter best, just as I know this plan will work- fathers instincts and all"

Sirius rolled his eyes, "fine, whatever but this better work I'm sick of Prongs whining"

Remus sighed before nodding; "Ok, but you really have to question her Mr Evans, make her question her own feelings and..."

Mr Evans glared at Remus who immediately cleared his throat; "Erm OK that's the plan done"

Peter smiled, happy it seemed that it had been his idea and not theirs that had been approved of; "Lets shake on it then" he said and they did.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: First of all a really big sorry! I know I told most of you that I would update last weekend and when I sent that messages half this chapter was written so I really thought I'd manage it, unfortunately family commitments and a whole lot of school work came in the way. But here it is and my college breaks up on Thursday for half term so i'll have more time to write.**

** A super big thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter, it was a chapter i felt nervous about and you guys made me feel much better about it so a big thank you- you guys are great!**

**I really enjoyed writing this chapter, even though it means this fic is nearly at its end (only two chapters and an epilogue left) and I hope you enjoyed it too! Please review and let me know what you think- they are much, much appreciated :D**


	7. Mr Evans Redemption

**Mr Evans Redemption**

**In which there are epiphanies, the mending of ways and one very strange exchange between Mr John Evans and Mr James Potter.**

Mr Evans was quite fortunate in the sense that he had never had the misfortune of coming face to face with a pack of wolves, or in fact any animal that could be described as dangerous.

That was of course until he decided to interfere in his daughters' love life, play the Marauders at their own game and cause another Potter-Evans fight.

You see sitting in his kitchen on Christmas morning after having done all the above, Mr Evans was faced with three boys that really could have passed for a pack of wolves.

Very angry wolves too.

Sirius Black having abandoned his breakfast was glaring menacingly at Mr Evans, Remus Lupin had his arms folded; his scars standing out just that bit more…in fact even Peter Pettigrew for all his resemblances to a pudgy potato looked somewhat intimidating.

Mr Evans shifted in his seat; "_Now…"_ he began, before realising he had nothing to say- it had been easy in his mind to envision himself sitting smugly in front of the Marauders parading his victory, the reality however was rather different.

"Do you mind telling us what the hell that was about?" asked Black, through gritted teeth.

Mr Evans gulped; "What was what about?" he asked feigning innocence.

Sirius pushed his chair back, and Mr Evans said a silent prayer- God that boy could look scary.

"Sirius, sit down." Ordered Lupin; "And Mr Evans you know exactly what Sirius is talking about" He looked him in the eye and Mr Evans could not help but look down, feeling very much as though he was back in his childhood days being scolded for some misdemeanour.

"Can't say I do" he said, in what he hoped was an airy _I've done nothing wrong_ voice.

Remus sighed; "You were supposed to make Lily realise her feelings not cause a great big fight. They haven't fought like this since…"

"Since last year" put in Peter and Sirius growled; "And now you've bloody messed…" but he cut off at the sight of Remus.

"Mr Evans can you just tell us what you told Lily? James did not go on a date last night, he was drunk yes but he has not been on a date in months."

"I didn't tell her anything!" Said Mr Evans, though he had to admit that Remus Lupin had a way of making a person squirm with guilt.

Sirius sighed; "Can we just get to the threatening now?"

Remus rolled his eyes; "Because that worked so well last time"

"Well, it would have if we chose _my_ plan instead of Wormys"

"_Hey!"_

"Oh for Merlins sake would you to _shut up_?"

Peter huffed and folding his arms turned his back to his two offending friends, neither Mr Evans noticed seemed to care.

Sirius merely rolling his eyes before speaking; "Mr Evans, Prongs…_James_ is my best mate ok? And Lily, yes she's your daughter _blah blah blah _but what you're doing is quite frankly ridiculous"

Mr Evans felt his face heat up in rage; how dare that boy…

"Sooner or later" continued Sirius; "Lily is going to find a guy, date him, marry him whatever and James he's not too bad…I've had to listen to him moan about Lily for the past four years" he shuddered; "he loves her, and no offense but I have no clue why"

Mr Evans raised an eyebrow but Sirius merely shrugged; "Lily's great but she's got one of the biggest tempers of anybody I know and trust me the only person I know that can handle Lily when she goes all…_possessed_, you know red cheeks, hair flying…is James and" he took a deep breath; "they're going to end up together whether you like it or not because I did not listen to how bloody green Lily's eyes are for _nothing_!"

For a moment the kitchen fell silent, Peter having forgot his anger was watching Sirius open mouthed, Remus wore a smirk and Mr Evans, well Mr Evans just stared. Stared at the boy, with the ridiculously handsome face and way too smart attitude before him- there was a part of him, (a part that he acknowledged begrudgingly) that was impressed by Sirius Blacks speech, it wasn't earth shattering by any means, but he realised it was a sign of a true friend and friendship was something Mr Evans valued…there was another part of him however that was not so accepting, this part saw Black as a rude and insolent boy, with no respect for his elders and certainly no one worth listening to.

For once Mr Evans was uncertain about his feelings and he did not like it. At all.

From the moment he had set eyes on the boys, no, even _before_ he had set eyes on the boys he had had opinions about each one of them.

None of these opinions were complementary.

Suddenly, however Mr Evans stomach was churning unpleasantly, Black he supposed was right about one thing; Lily would find someone one day, she would date and get married and…._why was Potter so bad?_

Because he just is, answered a voice in his head.

And Mr Evans frowned, Potter was arrogant of that he was certain, the boy was so…self-assured…but he had good taste in friends…but no, he was proud and hadn't Lily been at odds with him for years? Nobody could change so much…

He thought back to the evening before…the boy was funny and head boy and he could cook a decent meal too but… _NO!_ he shook his head firmly, no James Potter was not right for Lily…

_So who was?_

He sighed, only vaguely aware that the Marauders were staring at him in confusion.

Who was right for Lily?

Someone rich? But Potter was rich, and money he knew was not everything.

So someone kind, funny, down to earth…and yet even as these images of a perfect someone came to mind Mr Evans knew he would never be satisfied for anyone for Lily.

All he wanted, he realised was for her to be happy. Why was that so hard? He knew had his wife been alive, the order to let Lily live and make her own mistakes would be given.

But he didn't want Lily to make mistakes. He didn't want her to feel pain, to cry, to be hurt…

An image came to mind then and Mr Evans was up before Sirius could shout out a "_Hey-!"_

He thought of Lily yesterday, of her shock, her pain …being a good father he realised was not an easy job.

He rushed up the stairs (two at a time); it may have seemed strange and was strange he realised but _...he needed to know_.

He needed to know what was right for Lily. What was her perfect? He had gotten there in the end with Petunia, her perfect may have been Vernon Dursley (he wrinkled his nose at the name) but he had accepted it.

Now all he needed to know was what on earth was Lilys' perfect?

Reaching the landing however, Mr Evans seemed to lose all his energy, his excitement, his..._everything._

Lily, he realised had come up here after having a fight, a fight with a person she may or may not have had romantic feelings for ...he thought back to how she had left the kitchen; red hair flying, face practically beetroot, her eyes sharp and fiery... He shuddered.

He may not have learned a lot about women in his years (Agnes had once said he was about as competent as a cardboard box when it came to the ladies) but he did not know some things and one of these some things was that an angry women must be approached with caution.

An angry and also very emotional women was even more dangerous, it was he thought like walking into a dragons lair, add to the fact that said dragon had not eaten much, or had a good sleep well he may as well have had a death wish. Nevertheless, this was Lily ...his daughter, it couldn't be that bad and he thought with a smile, it's not like she's going to be crying...

Because the one thing worse than an angry women was a crying one.

Armed with the belief that his daughter would not be crying (she had no need to) Mr Evans knocked on her bedroom door.

No answer.

He knocked again.

"Lily?"

Still no answer- perhaps she was sleeping?

Mr Evans pushed the door open slightly and stepped in timidly; "Lily?" he called again.

And there she was.

Lying on her bed, face hidden in her pillows…Mr Evans gave a small smile images from her childhood once more flooding his mind.

"You ok Lily flower?" he asked.

Lily did not answer and Mr Evans sat on the edge of her bed, stroking her red hair and at a complete loss at what to say. Any inspiration he had had down stairs seemed to have mysteriously disappeared.

He knew what he wanted to say (you're not upset over that plonker are you? Complete waste of space if you ask me) but also knew it probably was not the right thing to say, the right thing would be...

He shook his head; right and wrong- it all became complicated when you became a father, it may have been blah, blah, blah to Sirius but to him it was his daughters'_ life_...

Lily shifted and sat up and Mr Evans turned to look at her, noticing her apple green eyes were for once wet with tears.

Mr Evans was outraged; surely she had not been crying for that… that _baboon_?

"Merry Christmas dad" she said with a weak smile and Mr Evans frowned; "you ok honey?"

"Yes… no" she wiped at her eyes furiously; "I don't ... I don't even know why I'm so upset...I mean he's…" she took a deep breath; "he's allowed to date whoever he wants... I'm not..." She turned to look out the windows; "I'm not anything to him. Anything but a friend"

Mr Evans stared. _Say something, say something_, and yet he had no idea what to say to his daughter...

She gave another watery smile; "you know when you asked me if I was dating James?"

He nodded; "I told the truth- I wasn't …I mean me…me and James?"

She shook her head, "he's an idiot- I could never be with someone like that! Did you see him last night? _Completely_ irresponsible"

Mr Evans nodded and together he and Lily spent the next fifteen minutes finding every fault of James Potter.

"And from what I've seen he's quite arrogant"

"Arrogant? It's his trademark"

And yet when he left Lily to let her go get ready Mr Evans could not help the sinking feeling in his stomach, a feeling that said you've made a big bloody mistake.

Bad mouthing James with Lily _should_ have been fun, invigorating even and yet it had been...half -hearted and though fun not the _let's relish in talking about what a bloody idiot this excuse of a man is_ fun but the _sigh let's laugh and find our friends silly faults fun..._ He shook his head; he had laughed _fondly _at James Potters (many) faults.

_Fondly. _

* * *

><p>Frowning Mr Evans paused outside his living room door- he was (of course) once again eavesdropping.<p>

"_Please" _came the unmistakable squeak of Pettigrew.

"No, for Merlins sakes Peter not until James comes!" that was undeniably the exasperated voice of Remus Lupin.

"But why not_? It's Christmas!"_

"Because" he heard Sirius say (in the voice of one who was extremely close to being driven mad) "we_ always_ open our presents together, it's tradition and so we have to wait for Prongs …now Moony pass the crisps"

Mr Evans felt a ghost of a smile on his face, the Marauders really were something else and then almost on impulse he grabbed his jacket and made his way out the front door.

The cold winter air bit into his skin and Mr Evans hurriedly did his zip, where on earth was Potter?

The shops, he thought were of course closed so unless Potter had done that funny spin and disappear thing he must be walking around here somewhere.

Grumbling about duties and stupid consciences (in the form of dead wives speaking in your head) Mr Evans made his way down the street.

It did not take him long to find the tall figure of James Potter, who was walking quite miserably down Maddison Avenue; his head down, his shoulders hunched, his feet kicking snow James Potter made quite the pitying image.

Sighing and praying that this would be done quickly and painlessly Mr Evans trudged over to James and then two feet away he stopped.

What on earth was he supposed to say to the boy?

_In fact why the hell was he even here?_

Mr Evans shook his head, perhaps he should just walk away…he looked back up at the boy who had stopped walking and was now scuffing his feet on the pavement.

And then before he could help it he spoke; "You really like her don't you?"

Mr Evans was more shocked than James Potter looked. Had he really he just…he shuddered, perhaps this was a dream, a nightmare, he had not just admitted that James Potter had real feelings for his daughter.

James on his part merely stood mouth open at Mr Evans before nodding and returning to his examination of the ground.

This, if possible made Mr Evans even more annoyed; Sirius had given that speech, his friends had planned so much and now when questioned by the father of the girl he supposedly loved James Potter merely nodded? _Nodded._

"Well, why do you lov…_like_ her?"

James looked up and frowned at Mr Evans; "You're her dad aren't you supposed to think there's nothing not to like about her? You know perfect princess and all that?"

Mr Evans grit his teeth and asked the heavens for patience; "Just answer the damn question!"

James gave a small smirk before shrugging; "She's…she's beautiful, her hair, her eyes…her eyes are…"

James it seemed could not put into words just what Lilys' eyes were but for once Mr Evans did not mind, Lily had after all inherited her mothers eyes and he knew just how hard it was to capture their beauty in words.

"and she's funny…you wouldn't think it, heck for the first few years I knew her I thought she was a stuck up know it all, but sometimes she…she's sarcastic and cheeky and she makes me laugh…"

Mr Evans sighed, he knew that cheek all too well; "Yeah, that cheek got her in a bit of trouble in her primary"

James smiled; "And and…she stands up for what she believes in, and she's ridiculously optimistic" he shook his head; "thinks she can change the whole world and _I don't know_! She's Lily, kind, funny, smart Lily…"

Mr Evans nodded; proud of course of his daughter.

"But she's not perfect…"

Mr Evans raised an eyebrow- and Potter had been doing _so _well.

"I mean she's bloody stubborn, more stubborn than me…"

"Stubborn as a bull" muttered Mr Evans, more to himself than James.

"And Merlin she has a temper" both men shuddered at memories of their own encounters with an angry Lily.

"Merlin, she can scream and …she worries too much, I mean it's enough to drive anyone insane!"

Mr Evans nodded and together he and James started to walk down the street (although both were quite unconscious to this fact.)

"So no, she's not perfect but…I'm not either, I reckon I can be…a little arrogant at times"

Mr Evans snorted.

"And maybe I'm a bit immature but…I guess nobody is perfect are they?"

Mr Evans frowned; "No" he said, "No, nobody's perfect"

For a while the two men walked in silence, it should Mr Evans realised have been awkward, what with James being in love with his daughter and all and yet surprisingly it wasn't. Mr Evans supposed it was because they were both too lost in their own thoughts.

He still didn't think James Potter was perfect for Lily but then again he didn't think anyone could be perfect for her…

"I'm sorry" said James suddenly and Mr Evans jumped out of his reverie.

"What for?" he asked gruffly.

James shrugged; "For last night, for all the trouble, for ruining your Christmas"

Mr Evans felt something shift uncomfortably in his stomach, something very close to guilt.

"I was stupid, going out, getting drunk but I swear to god Mr Evans I did _not_ go on a date… I like Lily and well, maybe I was stupid for thinking it but I thought…I thought we were getting somewhere" he cleared his throat; "and I haven't dated anyone in months"

Mr Evans took a deep breath; "I know…"

"You what?" asked James, who Mr Evans noticed looked as though he had been ready to argue his case.

"I know… it was a, a misunderstanding…I…that is someone said something to Lily which…" he cleared his throat; "which led to…some urh misimpressions and well" he scratched his head; "just a misunderstanding, nothing else"

There was no need he thought to tell the boy it had been him who had given the wrong information, it was not that he was _ashamed_ or anything of the sort, he just thought that it would be best that James Potter did not know how much of a threat he had been seen as, after all thought Mr Evans his head was already big enough.

James frowned before once again hunching his shoulders; "Right, a misunderstanding"

"It's not that bad is it?" asked Mr Evans.

James shook his head; "It's just that…I thought Lily knew me now, but…but she stills believes things like this about me" he gave a hollow laugh and Mr Evans bit his lip nervously.

"The….ah…the informant was someone she" he cleared his throat; "someone she trusts"

James pulled at his hair before letting out a growl (Mr Evans shifted away slightly); "It was Padfoot wasn't it? Or Remus? …." And Mr Evans listened as James went on about "stupid pranks" and "just like last time" and "bloody friends", there was a part of him that wanted to intervene, to tell James Potter the truth but then again…there was no harm in a small white lie was there?

When James finished his rant Mr Evans asked him what he planned to do now, rather than come up with some brilliant scheme however James went back to his hunched shoulders and frowning face, brooding Mr Evans thought, did not suit James Potter.

"I…I'll…" _stop talking he ordered himself, stop talking! _"I'll …talk to her for you"

James stopped walking and Mr Evans suddenly felt suffocated, he needed air, he needed air… what had he done?

What had possessed him to…

He shook himself mentally and felt his mouth drop into a perfect O, (very much the same as James own mouth).

It took a moment before he cleared his throat gruffly and began walking. James however did not follow and Mr Evans was forced to stop.

"I…you...Lily…hate…_what?"_

"Speak English will you boy!"

James gulped; "I…why?"

"Why what?" asked Mr Evans who was now pointedly looking at a pigeon.

"Why would you talk to Lily for me? You…you hate me! I'm the guy trying to…"

"Trying to steal her from me?" asked Mr Evans, one eyebrow up.

James said nothing and Mr Evans sighed; "What makes you think I hate you anyway?"

It was James turn to raise his eyebrows.

"And here I thought I was being subtle"

James laughed; "To be honest Sir, I don't think subtlety is an Evans family trait"

Mr Evans snorted; "No, no I don't suppose it is… and I don't hate you" he paused; "well, actually I do, you're trying to make my baby girl grow up but…I guess you're not too bad as boys go these days"

"I mean, you're better than Sirius- I shudder to think of the father of his girlfriend"

James laughed; "Yeah I don't think Sirius will be meeting any dads any time soon"

"And" sighed Mr Evans, "as much as I hate to admit it, and believe me I hate it, Lily likes you, you make her happy and you'll see one day when you're a father of your own, you only want your kids to be happy"

They walked together side by side all the way back to Mills Crescent, and talked about the Marauders and Lily and Mr Evans took the time to continue his interrogation of James and to set a few warnings too;

"Break her heart and believe me Potter I _will _kill you"

"In that case Mr Evans you should be ready to accept me as your future son-in-law because I don't intend of ever leaving Lily"

Mr Evans had coughed at that and James had to hit him on the back- something Mr Evans reckoned he did harder than necessary.

And then before they knew it they were at number sixty four. Mr Evans still did not believe James Potter was perfect for Lily, he was far too cocky and immature, and he really did have electrocuted hair that Mr Evans noticed he had a habit of messing up but…he liked, maybe even loved Lily and Mr Evans reckoned that was enough for now.

He hadn't been joking about killing Potter if he ever hurt Lily and despite his dislike of the idea of his daughter dating, somehow he didn't think James would hurt her and so he _would_ go up and he _would _talk to Lily.

It wouldn't be nice and it most certainly wouldn't be easy but it would he hoped make his daughter smile and that was all he wanted. After all compared to Dursley, James Potter was practically a saint.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So there it is, chapter seven! I hope you enjoyed it- it's one of the shortest chapters, but the next chapter is the last one (before the epilogue) and has Mr Evans talking to Lily, presents and a date so will most definitely be longer. **

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter- virtual hugs to all of you :D**

**Please, please review and let me know what you guys think- good or bad I want to know!**


	8. The Christmas that never was

**The Christmas that never was**

_**or...the day that caused fear, pain and even, believe it or not, happiness in the life of Mr John Evans**_

Mr Evans knew all about the Hogwarts houses, having scoured through Lily's books before her first term at Hogwarts. For as much as he would deny it Mr Evans was enthralled, excited and inexplicably _awestruck_ at the possibility of magic.

For this reason, he had, in his free time (or in the time he was supposed to be using to mow the lawn) pondered over wands and charms and most of all, about Hogwarts itself. He would never be permitted to see, let alone enter the magnificent castle but it seeped its way in to his minds' eye and after dropping off Lily in front of the Hogwarts Express that first year, he had spent the car journey home contemplating what house he would be in, had he been so fortunate to attend the magical school.

Slytherin, he had read was for the ambitious (and Mr Evans certainly believed he had ambition), they were also intelligent (another check), sly and cunning. And Mr Evans had thought that all in all, he might have fitted into Slytherin rather well. That is, until he tried and failed to hide the fact that he had permanently ruined his wife's favourite skirt.

He learned that day that no matter what _he _thought he was neither as sly nor discreet enough to truly be one of the snakes.

So then the brains of Hogwarts; Ravenclaw. Mr Evans had seriously considered his place in the house of the wise. He may have spent more time in his headmasters' office than the classroom as a youth but he was, despite appearances, a very intelligent man. _He_ was the one everyone went to with their problems, he had thought smugly, before learning that his friends had laden him with their problems not because of his brains but because they counted on his rather large mouth. In short, it was obvious to anyone who knew John Evans that he could never keep a secret from his wife, it was also a well- known fact that Agnes Evans was a wise women, who gave sound advice that her husband would in turn give to his worried friends.

The realisation that he had been used for his wifes advice along with the fact that he had been the only person not to realise this fact meant Mr Evans was resigned to admit that he did not belong in Ravenclaw. He was not too upset about this fact; _who wanted to be a studious, know-it-all anyway?_

It was just about the time Mr Evans had received Lilys' first letter home with the news of her Hogwarts house, that Mr Evans began to consider Gryffindor, the house of the lions. It was, he had thought, a rather brilliant house; there was no questioning that…but did he belong there?

Was he brave and chivalrous? Of course.

Loyalty? It was second nature.

And so for years, nearly seven years in fact Mr Evans had held the belief that he was one of the mighty, the brave, the _great_ Lions. Standing outside his daughters' bedroom door however, Mr Evans felt very much as though he was a mouse. A very small mouse which could _very _easily be trampled or swallowed by the magnificent lion…

He gulped.

He knew it was time to confess his sins. To tell his daughters his lies, to make her (he shuddered) accept James Potter but...

_God, it was scary._

He could feel his heart go _thump, thump, thump_, could hear laughter from the Marauders coming from downstairs and the loud music from next door seeping through the wall. Perhaps he would have a heart attack, or maybe he should_ fake_ a heart attack! Ah yes, he thought, the perfect plan- admit everything and then just when the bomb, sorry _Lily_ looks like she's going to explode, he can clutch his heart and...

It wouldn't work.

Lily, he thought, was far too clever (she was, after all, _his_ daughter). And then realisation struck. She was his daughter.

_Daughter._

She wouldn't explode at her dear old dad now would she?

And then before his mind could put together any more warnings Mr Evans pushed open the bedroom door. Lily was standing in front of the mirror and apparently in the middle of trying to control her mane of red hair.

"Hey, dad" she greeted as he walked in; "I'll be down in a minute, I just" she pulled her brush through her hair "need to" another brush "sort this" teeth gritted "hair out"

Mr Evans nodded absentmindedly before setting himself down on Lily's' bed.

"Erm, Lily dear… I..."

"Merlin, I _hate_ these knots!"

"Lily" he cleared his throat, "there's, there's uh… something, something I need to talk…_can you put the brush down?"_

"What?" She asked and turned to look at her father for the first time.

"Perhaps you should sit down" Mr Evans shifted. "Like I said, there's something I need to talk..." he licked his lips; "to you about"

Lily frowned; "Is everything ok? You look a bit pale..." she reached out to put a concerned hand on Mr Evans forehead; it did not help the guilt already bubbling within him.

"Please, just sit" sighed Mr Evans, "it's, it's about...about Potter, I mean James, it's about James"

Lily rolled her eyes and seemed ready to resume her hair brushing before Mr Evans held up a hand.

"I... I lied to you" there quick and easy just like a plaster...

"What?" Lily frowned; "what are you talking about?"

Mr Evans stood up; "Perhaps I should start from the beginning…"

And so he started; he told Lily about Petunia bringing Vernon around, how he was sure a proposal was on the way…Lily intervened and frowned and questioned just what this had to do with anything and Mr Evans held up an irritated hand and continued…

"And then you turned up, with them _lot"_

And suddenly Mr Evans was telling Lily all about how James Potter looked electrocuted and he was sure Sirius Black belonged to some dangerous gang and then about how he felt when he saw them together. Again, Lily tried to protest but Mr Evans continued his tale, pacing up, down, up, down as he did so; and then finally he reached the crux of the story and his words tripped, and his heart beat soared and so (for his own sanity) he skipped over the eavesdropping and the carrying upstairs and said…

_"Sirius and Remus and Peter wanted to set you and James up"_

Lily's face flushed red and her mouth opened (no doubt to go on a rant) but Mr Evans cut over her…

"They seemed to think, you both were, _are_ madly in love with each other" he scowled; "and, well, they said they'd be trying to get you together for months and they asked…" he avoided Lily's eyes; "They asked me for help"

The moment was stifled with awkwardness, it was a situation that Mr Evans in all his years, had never dreamed of being in...if only he could disappear...

Mr Evans chanced a look at Lily; "You didn't? _Please, say you didn't…_" she had a hand on her forehead now and Mr Evans felt the fear sweep through his body, how would she react when he told her the whole truth?

"No, no, I didn't help…but I…you have to understand, you, Potter…you looked like you were…dating"

Lily stood up; "No, no, _we did not!_ We, Merlin dad, we're friends! Or we were but…" she was spluttering, red hair a tangled mess and green eyes blazing, Mr Evans shrunk back in to the corner… the further, the better... right?

"Yeah, I know that now! But…you looked so cosy and well, I, uh, I tried to break…break you up"

"_You what?"_

"I tried to break you up" Mr Evans mumbled before realising something, "But it…it doesn't really matter right? I mean, you weren't really dating so I did no…"

He cut of at Lily's glare; "You tried to break off my _non-existent_ relationship?" she asked, hands on hips.

Mr Evans nodded mutely.

"And you think, you think it doesn't matter?"

"No! Because…"

And it didn't, did it? He had assumed his daughter was dating James and so naturally took …uh…precautionary measures to sabotage the non-existent relationship but she hadn't been dating him so really thought Mr Evans he had done nothing wrong, nothing at all.

Lily apparently did not agree with her fathers' sentiments; "It doesn't matter if I was dating or not! The fact is you have _no right_ to try and ruin my relationships, _existent or not!_"

_No right? NO RIGHT?_ Mr Evans opened his mouth in outrage; "I'm …I'm your father!"

"Yes, you are, but what if, I dunno, what if I _was_ dating James, what if it was someone I cared about? " she sighed; "you can't…I…I'm not kid anymore dad…ok? I'm going to make new friends and date and grow up…and you CANNOT try to ruin everything for me!"

Mr Evans looked down, suddenly overcome by shame at his actions; "I know Lily, I know that now but…but then I, all I thought about was …you…my little girl and how James Potter was... not worthy of you" he snorted remembering the conversation he had had with said boy less than half an hour ago.

Lily stared before sitting down on her bed; "…what'd you do?" She asked, as though fearing the worst.

Mr Evans gave her a sheepish smile, which Lily did not return, and sighing Mr Evans continued his tale.

"So…so" Lily spoke through gritted teeth fifteen minutes later and Mr Evans flinched, _God she was scary_; "what you're telling me is you sent them out? You sent them out till god knows what hour_ just to make me fight with James_?"

"I…I didn't tell them to stay out so late!" Mr Evans protested. Really now, she couldn't make him take responsibility for everything could she?

Lily merely glared; "Was, was there" she cleared her throat; "was there even a girl?"

Mr Evans smiled slightly; "no, no, I lied…I'm sorry Lily I really, really am but I guess, I was stupid, I was just trying to be a good dad…"

Lily nodded looking down; "right, right…I…well, it doesn't matter anyway, you might have planned the damn thing, but no one told Potter to go and get pissed as hell or get into a bloody fight or…" she pulled at her hair; _"What is wrong with men?"_

Mr Evans smirked; "what can I say? We're an inferior breed? Stupid?"

Lily snorted; "Stupid overprotective fools and I'll take the inferior breed too"

Mr Evans smiled; "Are you still angry?"

Lily rolled her eyes; "of course, I'm still bloody angry! I mean, I know why you did it…I know but I thought by now, at least, you'd trust me to make my own decisions, to make the right ones! I'm not…I'm not a baby anymore, dad"

Mr Evans nodded, a lump forming in his throat; "I know sweetie, I know, and I'm sorry, I really am" he gave her a small smile; "so about Potter…" He was about to say it, his heart beat soared…he'd regret it, he knew that but… "I reckon you should make up…"

_"WHAT? NO!_"

"But, Lily, come on, the poor boy didn't…"

"Poor boy?" scoffed Lily; "Need I remind you the state he was in when he came back last night? Or was it this morning?"

Mr Evans sighed, the words which were now on the tip of his tongue were dangerous, they held power and he realised were completely irreversible. The chances were, that he would regret saying them, but he _had_ to… the look in Lily's eyes as she stood admonishing James Potters actions were evidence enough…they did not however, make it any easier.

"You like him"

_"What?"_

"you like him, like…_like_…Shakespeare love and you know" he shrugged his shoulders, "I dunno, just _like_ _like_, like and I…Ithinkyoushouldgivehimachance"

For a moment, Lily merely stared at her father and Mr Evans supposed his daughter was questioning his sanity because the heavens knew that was what he was doing. Shakespeare love? _What had he been thinking?_

Lily seemed to be wondering the same thing; _"Shakespeare love?_

Mr Evans blushed a bright red, and seemed to be suddenly overcome by very bad coughing fit. It served well as a reason for his not answering.

"You're mad! You know that dad? You are completely bonkers! I mean, first you tell me that you try to break me and James up- when_ we're not even dating_ and now, now you say I love him?"

"I said you _like-like_ him!"

Lily glared; "You know what, I think you need a drink, go down and I'll be along in a minute and…"

"Lily"

"And oh Merlin, have you even done the turkey?"

"Lily"

"I guess, I'll have to try my best with it, lunch might be a bit late though…"

"Lily"

"And…"

"Lily!"

_"WHAT?"_ Mr Evans stared at his daughter in front of him who knew, he thought, that she could be so oblivious to something so obvious.

"Just…just listen ok? And…think"

"Think?"

"Think" Mr Evans nodded; "do you know how I knew I was in love with your mother? I could be myself with her. It was strange but…I was, I was only really myself with her, I mean i could burp and fart and…"

Lily raised an eyebrow.

"and I could _be myself_, say what I think, tell her my plans…we were comfortable together, you know…and I regret taking so long to just tell her how I felt…it was daft but I was scared" he frowned; "mostly of your granddad I think…anyway, we had great times together, but we fought like hell too" he shook his head; "you remember, her moaning about my laziness or my this or that but…I loved her and now... now she's gone"

Lily looked up, opening her mouth, but Mr Evans held up a hand.

"My point is Lily, you never know how long you have. Now, I want you to live till you're a hundred and something with all your great, great grandkids but..."

"I know dad" she cleared her throat; "I know, life is…unpredictable but, but, I don't…_like- like_ James!"

"Yesterday, when the boys came back, who were you most angry with?"

"James…" and then seeing her father's look, Lily rolled her eyes; "but it was because he's the leader, you know, they all listen to the mighty Potter!"

"And you were cross about him going on a date correct?"

"No, I was cross that he went and didn't even tell me" she sent a pointed look at Mr Evans here.

"But then, why weren't you angry with Sirius?"

_"What?_ Look dad, I know you care but I don't need you to be my therapist…you do enough damage as my father" She sent him another more pointed look.

"_As true as that may be_, you need to admit it Lily, you like- like that bafoon Potter!"

"I do not! What is wrong with you? Honestly,_ I'm going to be scarred for life_ …"

"And...you admitted it last night!" finished Mr Evans triumphantly.

Lily merely rolled her eyes; "I did no such thing"

"Did too! You said, and I quote, _'I thought, we had something'_"

_**"I DID NOT SAY THAT!"**_

"Well, not exactly but…"

_"Dad!"_ she began, before abruptly stopping and turning towards the door. Mr Evans closed his mouth, following her gaze; the Marauders who had they had been able to hear scream and shout and laugh had suddenly gone mysteriously quiet.

"Look dad" Lily began again, although this time quietly, "I, I don't know _what _I feel, or…" she frowned "_don't feel_ for Potter but, _you are my dad_" She fixed him with a steady look "and well, I would _really, really_, rather not have this conversation with you ok? I mean, I'm a teenage girl, you are my father- boys should _really not_ be on the agenda" she gave a half pained, half pleading look.

And Mr Evans nodded, embarrassment suddenly overcoming him, he had known he was going to admit the truth to Lily, he hadn't however planned on diving so deeply in to her, ahem, _love life_ (or lack of it) and now that he had or at least tried to he couldn't help feeling completely and utterly mortified and awkward and every other feeling that denoted un-comfortableness. He wanted nothing more, that moment than to escape, and to take back every word he had uttered to Lily in that room; not only had he broken every rule of a father (_**never, never influence them to date)**_ but he had also succeeded in thoroughly embarrassing both himself and Lily.

Needless to say to Mr Evans, the door out of his daughters' room had never seemed so welcoming. If only then, he could have got out of it in time, you see unfortunately for old, truthfully nearer to fifty then forty Mr Evans the moment Lily finished her speech, a loud screech came from an owl pecking on the window and at the very same moment Mr Evans wearing back gave a very sharp throb.

Faced with this unexpected pain and Lily's current preoccupation with the visiting owl, Mr Evans decided it would be a good idea to sit down.

Just for a moment.

He did not realise that he was making a very, very big mistake or that in a few moments he would completely regret his decision to sit down (that is, after he got over the pain)

You see, really, it's all down to a chair.

An old, rickety, wooden chair.

It was a chair that had sat in the corner of Lily's room right beside her wardrobe for _years_. It was a chair, Lily from experience, never sat on, in fact it was a chair nobody who entered the Evans household ever sat on. Even Petunia, for all her uninterest with anything Lily, knew that one must _never_ sit on the old, rickety, wooden chair. The only purpose the chair served now was a convenient place for Lily to dump various items on, in those rare days where she really did not have the time or energy to be her usual organised self. Mr Evans, was completely oblivious to all this, and so as Lily tried to untie a letter from a troublesome owl, he feeling sorry for his poor back, sat down.

The next few seconds were chaos and had the neighbours not been playing loud Christmas carols, Mr Evans was sure they would be knocking on his door curious for answers. As it was they merely paused their partying for a second, as the loud scream of Mr John Evans reverberated around his house walls.

The chair old, weak, rickety and wooden as it was had collapsed under the weight of Mr Evans. Naturally, he had screamed and so naturally Lily had yelped and so was it really any surprise that the owl in her hands began screeching? The Marauders below heard screams and shouts and the hooting's of an owl and added their own thunderous footsteps to the soundtrack of the Evans household.

The sight that greeted them was… well,_ interesting_, to say the least.

Mr Evans sat on the floor, wooden splinters surrounding him, his legs slightly apart and a horrified expression on his face. Lily had a similar look on her own face, one hand covering her mouth as she desperately tried to think, the owl gave one last indignant hoot and flew out through the open window. James Potter, met with this sight, had to resist the suddenly overpowering urge to laugh and Sirius Black could only say; "That's two galleons to me, I think"

At that, Mr Evans had looked up both angry and embarrassed and had noticed James shake his head; "_No way,_ Lily did not do this to Mr Evans" and then turning to said man; "Did she, Sir?"

"No, she bloody well didn't! It was a…a…accident now help me up will you, _you useless sod!_"

James responded with a smirk, while Sirius Black made a show of pouting, eventually though the boys managed to pull up Mr Evans, who could safely say that this Christmas had been the worst he had ever had the misfortune of living through. The next few minutes were equally chaotic; Lily rushed around her father and fussed over him whilst the Marauders watched arms folded and once again with a glint of mischief radiating them.

"So what was this two galleons about, anyway?" Asked Mr Evans trying desperately not to wince as Lily applied slight pressure to his back- _he was not weak!_

Remus coughed, whilst Sirius and James exchanged looks leaving Peter to answer; "Sirius seemed to think after you told Lily everything she'd uh," he scratched his head; "hex you?" Mr Evans widened his eyes and Lily stopped her mothering for a second; "_What?"_

"Yeah…anyway, Prongs reckoned she wouldn't, so they took a bet" he finished with a shrug of the shoulders.

Mr Evans frowned; "wait…what exactly did you think I was telling Lily?" he asked suspiciously.

"Everything, y'know the whole plan you had with us, the lies…" Mr Evans opened his mouth at the look of mischief in Sirius Blacks eyes, before turning frightfully to James Potter (he really, really didn't need another injury) But much to his intense surprise James Potter merely laughed, making Mr Evans open and close his mouth (looking much like the fish he had accused James of being not two days ago.)

"But..._what..._I…you...marauders" he finished rather desperately (and incoherently), ignoring Lily whose eyes were now boring into his bruised neck. James Potter raised an eyebrow and Mr Evans took a deep breath, in an attempt to steady his speeding heart rate, before speaking;

"_Before"_ he started, emphasising the word; "when we were...I told you it was _them_" he pointed wildly at the other three boys; "and, and you,_ you_ believed me!" he could not help the accusatory tone in his voice and a small part, the part that wasn't in pain or confusion, was wondering why on earth he was making such as big deal of the whole situation- Lily after all, already knew the truth.

James shook his head; "I didn't"

"What?"

"I didn't believe you" said James, an annoying smirk on his face; "it couldn't have been _them_, I knew _that, _before I asked"

"B, but..." stuttered Mr Evans.

"These lot" he nodded towards his friends; "have been planning one thing after the other for the past year, so, yeah maybe none of the plans _actually work_ but I know that no matter how stupid they look or actually are"

His three friends gave an indignant, _"Hey!" _that he ignored and gave his full attention to Mr Evans (and rightly so).

"They would never deliberately do something like ..._that _and" he continued, "_you_ were the only who spoke to Lily last night, Padfoot was sloshed, Peter passed out in a minute and Moony's too god damn noble to lie"

Mr Evans and James Potter looked each other in the eye; Mr Evans glared defiantly, trying (and unknowingly failing) to look unremorseful for his actions, and James trying (and succeeding) in showing that he forgave Mr Evans for those actions.

Lily was studiously ignoring the four Marauders and began rubbing ointment on Mr Evans now bluing neck, whilst the Marauders merely watched their friend in amusement. There was a moment of silence before James spoke again, eyes still on Mr Evans; "So did you..." he began, glancing quickly at Lily.

"Gave it a go" responded Mr Evans casually

"Didn't go too well?"

"That, my boy, is an understatement"

James smirked and Mr Evans noticed his fellow Marauders send him bemused and curious looks, even Lily had stopped her prodding.

"Bet you're happy about that, right?" James asked after a second.

"Can't say I'm not" It was Mr Evans turn to smirk now and James merely laughed before, sending one more look towards Lily and leaving the room, his friends (who were all, to Mr Evans intense amusement sporting confused looks) following him.

They had barely left before Lily spoke (or Mr Evans thought, shouted); "Will you, _please_, tell me just what the_ hell_ that was about?" She spoke through gritted teeth, but Mr Evans merely shrugged before wincing in pain and deciding to go with the whole- _I'm-innocent-and-have-no-idea-what-you're-talking-about _routine_._

"What was what about, dear?"

_"That!"_ She threw her hands up in exasperation; "you and ….Potter and the whole ...I_ dunno,_ the looks, the cryptic talk, everything!"

Mr Evans shook his head; "I have _no idea_ as to what you are referring...now, you don't mind putting some more of that cream on my neck do you" he turned his neck experimentally; " I think, I might have pulled something"

Lily glared; "and just whose fault is that?" She asked before putting the ointment on the table with a rather loud bang and leaving the wrecked room and a very sore Mr Evans behind. A Mr Evans who in all honesty, could not for the life for him, understand how _falling through a chair_ could possibly be his _own_ fault. It didn't occur to him that the only reason the chair had remained in Lily's' room was because of _his _insistence that it could not be thrown out, despite its age. And it most certainly did not occur to Mr Evans that his wife had once spent months complaining about_ that_ chair or that Lily had done so for _longer_ or that all in all, he had been told about the dangerous chair no less than a hundred times.

So it wasn't his fault. _Not at all._

oOo

An hour later and the Evans household was normal, or as normal as it could be with four wizards, one witch and an extremely over-protective father.

Mr Evans had decided to have another bath so as to allow his body (and mind) a well-deserved rest. Lily with the help of Remus, (the only marauder she was currently on speaking terms with) managed to clear the wreck that was her room. The old rickety, wooden chair that once belonged to some long gone Evans, was not fixed with a quick _reparo_, rather the pieces were collected and thrown, finally, into the bin.

She had also when Mr Evans had returned to her room enquired about his pain and given him a "potion" of some sorts, somehow though Mr Evans believed his daughter was still quite angry with him. What he couldn't tell was whether this anger stemmed from his breaking her chair, his conversation with Potter, his conversation trying to persuade_ her_ to like Potter or his lies.

All in all, it was one of the most depressing Christmas days Mr Evans had had the misfortune of living through. The day was supposed to be filled with delicious food, presents, tons of joy and of course, at least one family fight. So far however, they had only managed to fill one criteria of Christmas (a fight or in this case _fights_), the turkey was still somewhere deep in a freezer, not one present had been opened and though the day had brought a multitude of emotions (anger, shock, guilt) joy was yet to be felt.

Early evening saw the Marauders and Mr Evans all in the living room, Lily it seemed, was boycotting all the males of the house. The five of them had had a quiet game of "eye-spy", watched the Queens speech and other Christmas times special, before Sirius Black lounging on one of the sofas fell asleep. It was not long after Sirius gave his first snore that Peter on the floor, fell asleep himself, resting his head on said sofa. Remus Lupin contented himself with what to Mr Evans, looked like a most boring book.

Mr Evans, himself sat on his very own armchair, with a newspaper in front of him and a pen in hand as he tried to tackle the crossword with the help of James Potter;

"Seven letters across…" he began at exactly half past four, before the door to the living room was pushed open and he was forced to stop.

Lily entered and Mr Evans waited with baited breath; either his daughter was now going to scream all of them into the next century or she came with forgiveness. Personally, he was hoping for the latter. Upon entering the room, however, Lily did not look once in her father's direction instead she turned to James Potter and to Mr Evans intense shock asked to talk to the boy.

Talk to him.

Alone.

For a second, okay, a minute Mr Evans felt the familiar urge to throttle the boy before him, if only because Lily wanted to speak to him. Alone. Then, he remembered that he was supposed to be encouraging their…alliance and so with no more than a scratch on a chin, Mr Evans refused to acknowledge his daughter or the fact that James had already jumped to his feet.

Once they left however, he shared an urgent look with Remus and then almost simultaneously they both got to their feet and as close to the door as possible. Bodies practically squashed against the old wooden frame, Mr Evans and Remus Lupin both put their ears to a door to eavesdrop as though the past few hours had taught them nothing about the consequences of meddling.

Which really it hadn't.

"I just wanted to say…" Mr Evans pushed his ear even further to the door, _why did Lily have to talk so quietly?_

"No, wait!" Ah, that was better, Potter knew just the right volume; "Before, you say anything, I…I just want to say…"

Mr Evans grunted, had it really been necessary for him to lower his voice like that? But, then again Mr Evans could guess what was on the end of that sentence; an apology no doubt. But what would Lily's' response be?

"It's fine, it wasn't really your fault, well, the drinking was but…I forgive you for making me worried sick" Mr Evans could hear the smile in his daughters voice and naturally frowned, ignoring Lupin who was positively beaming beside him. Scowling, Mr Evans pushed slightly against Lupins thin frame. The result was for the young boy to yelp, and somehow tumble backwards.

Mr Evans felt a twinge of guilt and whispered a quick apology before pressing his ear firmly back on to the door. Unfortunately, for Mr Evans the raucous caused by his small….shove had served as a warning of eavesdroppers to Lily and James, whose shuffling footsteps he could now hear.

Turning around, to face the sandy haired boy, Mr Evans felt a strong urge to put all the blame on his no doubt, weak shoulders. At the sight of a red faced Remus, surrounded by a now awake Peter and Sirius however, Mr Evans decided taking all the blame himself would in this case, be best.

The next half an hour of Mr Evans life was torturous; his eyes alternated from the clock on the wall and the firmly closed door. Where were James and Lily and more importantly, _just what were they doing?_

The only thing preventing Mr Evans, or indeed the Marauders from leaving the room to search for the two "missing" people was fear of what they might find. In fact, Mr Evans wasn't entirely sure what would be worse; his daughter and Potter trying to kill each other or if they were, ahem, engaged in other "K" starting activities.

He shuddered; perhaps he did know which was worse.

Fortunately, for Mr Evans he did not need to walk in on either, instead only twenty minutes later both Lily and James returned…with treasure.

Ok, so maybe it wasn't treasure, but it was food, which to Mr Evans grumbling stomach was as good as any amount of treasure. There was Gods' blessing to the world (tea), scrumptious looking Victoria sponge and a stack of sandwiches that were begging to be eaten.

The sight of food seemed to have awoken the other Marauders to their hunger and they soon descended upon the trays like ravenous beasts- Mr Evans could safely say _he _did not display this behaviour, no, he thought as he took a bite, he had_ far_ better decorum.

For a while, silence descended the living room of number 64 Mills Crescent as the occupants enjoyed their meal, Mr Evans was so intent on enjoying his sandwich that he received quite a shock when Lily cleared her throat and began to speak, eyes fixed on the Marauders.

"There's, there's something I want to say…"she began, before being (rather rudely, in Mr Evans opinion) interrupted by Sirius Black.

"No, wait, Lily, we need to say something first" he smiled and for once Mr Evans noticed, it was not a cocky smirk but a genuine smile.

Remus nodded; "We're sorry for making stupid plans again and…"

"Although" put in Sirius; "Had it not been for _some_ people, our plan might have actually worked…"

Mr Evans glared, _that boy…_

"Anyway, we really are sorry for yesterday" Peter finished with a kind smile and Mr Evans, saw, from the smile on Lily's face that she really had forgiven the boys, in fact, he doubted she could ever stay mad at them.

They were four, complete lunatics who could, on their own, destroy the universe with their mischief and yet, it was not hard to see Lily loved them and though Mr Evans could not say the same for himself, he could also not truthfully say, he felt nothing for the four boys sitting in his living room.

"I forgive you" she sighed; "but try it again and…"

"You'll hex us to hell?"

"And back" she smirked before sighing; "And for the record, I'm sorry too, for blowing up this morning. Worst Christmas ever, right?"

It was Peter who answered; "No turkey, no tree, no presents…" he shook his head sadly and Mr Evans was forced to agree, this Christmas was undoubtedly one of the worst.

James, however, was beaming and once again Mr Evans was forced to question his sanity.

"No... It's not"

_"What?_" the others all turned towards him frowning, even Lily looked incredulous.

"It's not Christmas!" He looked around at the rest, a ridiculous smile on his face, excitement glinting in his eyes. Mr Evans thought he looked rather mad...

"That's it" said Remus, "He's finally lost it"

But James merely smiled wider; "Well, it is…but not for us…we can still have our Christmas"

He stared around them, they in turn, stared back in silence that is, before Sirius frowning at his best friend suddenly jumped up with a smile; _"You_, my friend, are a genius"

And then to Mr Evans intense surprise (and amusement) both the two boys began a rapid speech;

"You do mean make today…"

_"Exactly!"_

"Brilliant" he looked around; "decorations?"

"Of course and a tree…"

"Of course" Sirius rolled his eyes; "And turkey and …."

"Pumpkin juice"

"Treacle tart"

"Chocolate cake"

_"Triple_ chocolate cake"

"_James!"_

James, turned, mouth open and grinning like the maniac he was; "Yes, dear"

Lily rolled her eyes; "Care to explain?"

Sirius grinned; "We" he began; "are going to celebrate Christmas..._ tomorrow_"

Mr Evans frowned in confusion, this was the great plan?

Peter seemed to be thinking along the same lines; "_tomorrow?_" he asked a puzzled look on his face.

"Exactly, today, is for us at least, Christmas eve"

_"It is?"_

"Yes, it is!" Said James seemingly frustrated at his friends lack of enthusiasm; "…we'll decorate, prepare, do whatever it is you do before Christmas and then tomorrow, well,_ tomorrow will be Christmas…_."

Mr Evans frowned, there was a part of him that felt the need to scoff at this idea, to harrumph and frown and moan and…be a father but…

On the other hand…he also wanted to have a good Christmas and quite frankly to forget this day and, at the current moment, James Potter was giving him just that opportunity…a do over, of sorts. Excitement bubbled within him and he clapped his hands in approval; "Great idea, boys!" he beamed as Lily shook her head wearily. The boys looked at both father and daughter in amusement; "see, now you have your head on right" said Sirius, as he (quite unnecessarily) clapped Mr Evans on the back.

James, meanwhile, was left with the job of convincing Lily; "Come on Lils, think about it, we'll spend today decorating, preparing the turkey and tomorrow, tomorrow can be a real Christmas!"

Lily, however still did not look convinced and it took the combined efforts of all four boys and the promise of them doing the cleaning up, before she nodded.

Mr Evans beamed, it seemed he would be getting the Christmas he wanted after all and he had no worries.

Nothing.

Zilch.

Except, that is, for a… _curiosity_ as to just what James and Lily had conversed about…but then again he wasn't really worried…

Seriously, _he wasn't._

There would be no more planning or prodding or, or…or….getting involved.

There would however, he thought, be a need for a bit of eavesdropping….

Just so that he knew what was going on.

Just a bit because God knew, no one told him anything.

The eavesdropping however would not come till later; first Mr Evans was tasked with the job of finding the decorations. This, all in all, was not too tiresome of a task; in fact, it would have been an extremely easy one minute job had it not been for the Marauders…

It was all, Mr Evans thought, Lilys fault. And, yes, he hardly ever blamed his dear daughter for anything, but for once Mr Evans was most certain that his current …situation was because of his dear daughter.

Perhaps, he thought, it had been part of her revenge, maybe his dear daughter had all these years been holding a vendetta against him; maybe she just wanted him to suffer... Whatever it was, Mr Evans was not happy. You see, Lily had conveniently let it slip to her friends/raving lunatics that her father had a _dump_ room and to four boys who spent the majority of their time exploring and wreaking havoc a dump room that held potentially years of junk was a treasure chest.

Which meant Mr Evans, despite his many protests could not go alone into his sacred room but was forced to take the herd (as he now referred to them) with him.

James and Sirius both descended upon the boxes with so much enthusiasm that Mr Evans had to fear for his many revered possessions; who knew, he thought, one of those boxes they roughly threw aside could, in fact hold something worth millions- one could dream, after all.

Remus, on the other hand, had entered the room with a look of true awe on his face and delved in to the boxes with what, Mr Evans could see, was true interest. He could not, however, help treat this behaviour with suspicion; it would not be hard for something to be sneaked into a pocket... Meanwhile, Peter merely tried to stand upright and soon became stuck (courtesy of his rounded stomach) when he tried to go in to a small corner that James and Sirius had decided to explore.

It had taken the other three marauders and one gigantic push to get him out.

A push that just happened to make Peter fall backwards and knock a box down, a box that Mr Evans knew all about, a box he had strove to hide for the past three years…

He stretched arms out, ready to catch it.

It fell open, releasing its contents right at the feet of Sirius Black.

Mr Evans heart thumped. He turned to his daughter, and for once was glad his wife wasn't around although... _If Lily was anything like her mother…_

"You have a motorbike?" Sirius practically screamed and Mr Evans winced; "No, no…me? Don't be ridiculous!"

"But here's the manual and" he reached into the box; "a helmet" Black was practically grinning by now, lips stretched wide open and Mr Evans had a sudden urge to thump him.

He resisted with much difficulty.

"No" he cleared his throat; "I mean, yes, that is a helmet but it's not mine" he gave a laugh; "some old geezer just left it at the garage…"

Lily raised her eyebrow; "Some old geezer?"

"Yeah," Mr Evans scratched his head nervously; "Dunno his name"

"You don't know his name?"

"Nope" said Mr Evans, popping his "p" and rocking back on his feet, his arms swaying by his side.

"Dad, we live in _Cokeworth_" her arms were folded now.

"And?"

"And, you know every bloody person around here"

"Don't be ridiculous Lily, I don't know _everybody_"

"Close enough" her eyes were narrowed and Mr Evans realised that despite what she may have said, she had not forgiven him for his meddling or lies.

He shuddered and opened his mouth, how on earth was he supposed to tell his daughter, his _seventeen_ year old daughter that hitting the fourty-five year old bench mark had sent him on a frenzy, how on earth could he explain the horror, the fear that he had felt when he found out that he had forgotten his own birthday. Mr Evans shook his head. No, he could not admit to his daughter that he had been so intent to feel young that he had ventured out late at night and spent a lot of money on a motor bike that he had not ridden once.

He scratched his head, opened his mouth, turned it into a rather convincing yawn, looked at the four amused Marauders and then to the floor.

Lily sighed, however before she or Mr Evans could say a word it was James Potter who spoke; "Come on Lils, you can't honestly believe _your dad_ would buy motorbike can you? I mean,_ really?"._

In any other circumstances, Mr Evans would have, most likely, been offended but since James seemed to be helping or at least attempting to help..

Lily frowned; "But…"

"And, it's Christmas…or_ Christmas eve_" he shook his head; "Let's start the decorations..."

Lily gave her father one more look before reluctantly turning to leave, James in her wake; "Come on!" he called to the other Marauders before turning and winking at a bewildered Mr Evans. Disaster, having been diverted and Mr Evans feeling confusedly thankful of James Potters existence preparations began and in some miraculous way, one of the worst days in Mr Evans life soon turned into one of the best.

It was, all of course, thanks to the live entertainment he had the pleasure of enjoying. The live entertainment, which included four raving lunatics and their mission of creating as much, mischief, mayhem and of course, magic as possible…

It was not long before a long forgotten plant, was transfigured with the wave of wand and the utterance of a few latin words into a Christmas tree.

Decorations were weaved on as Sirius Black and James Potter led a chorus of "ye, you old hippogriffs". Their singing was dreadful, to say the least; out of tune and far, far too loud and yet Mr Evans found himself enjoying it and even joined in for a while before catching James and Lily sharing a knowing look, that once again made him question the contents of _that_ conversation.

He could not, however, spend too much time worrying over it; what with a tree wrapped with an overload of tinsel and baubles left on the floor and James Potter thrusting an angel into his hand. It was mind-wrecking, exhilarating and completely and totally exhausting.

By the time the tree looked as though it would collapse with any more decorations, Pettigrew insisted that the room too needed to be decorated and the other Marauders agreed heartily and so they adorned the room with a bit of this and that and Mr Evans was treated with Lily scolding the Marauders insisting their creative genius, really wasn't creative or genius at all.

All in all the day had been filled with more emotions than Mr Evans had ever felt; there was the guilt of the morning, the confusion whilst talking to Potter, even more confusion with Lily, pain, more guilt, curiosity and now, delirious happiness.

He sighed and fell into his old armchair with a sigh, the house was now fit to hold Christmas celebrations, food preparations had been made and they had all just finished their third (or was it fourth) cup of tea of the day. Lounging around the room were the other Marauders and Lily; all were too exhausted to muster the energy to do anything but watch T.V and so there they sat, whilst Mr Evans mind whirred away thinking about the past few days.

It wasn't long before he realised that neither he nor Lily, for that matter, had heard the whole story of the night before and so naturally curious Mr Evans opened his mouth and asked, not even pausing to think about the fact that the previous night held pained memories for all in the room, luckily for Mr Evans however Lily was to lethargic to glare and Sirius Black never ran out of energy.

"Oh, it was brilliant"

"It was not" put in Peter; "we all got pissed and Prongs got…"

"Wormy! Have I taught you nothing? That is not how we tell of the adventures of the great, of the…"

"Oh, just get on with it will you, Padfoot"

Sirius smirked and nodded; "Right, so it all started with _the plan_…"

Lily groaned; "Can we skip this part?"

Mr Evans blushed at the reminder of his actions, the Marauders however, merely chuckled; "ok, so when we left your great abode, we decided we might as well _actually_ go look for my motorbike…"

"So we did" Put in James; "Only it didn't quite work out the way we wanted"

"_That_ is an understatement; apparently people don't appreciate random teenagers turning up on Christmas Eve"

"Anyway, so we went, we knocked- no answer…"

"So naturally, we hung around a bit more…"

"A bit more? It was two bloody hours!"

"Yes, Moony, but it was two hours that could have ended with me having a motorbike!"

"But it didn't" and Mr Evans watched as Peter got a slap on the head for this statement- he was Mr Evans realised, the baby of the group and though he was clumsy, had no tact, and was more often than not teased by the others, it was not spiteful, rather it was the teasing his own big brother had given him. He smiled; the boys really were a family.

"Two hours later and we're still there, Prongs moaning about Lilykins, Wormy crying for food and Moony, well, being Moony and worrying" Sirius rolled his eyes.

"For good reason too"

Sirius ignored this and continued; "Right, so two hours later and this bloke comes out, big bloke, gigantic, like, like….

"Like someone who's had an overdose of a growth potion"

"Exactly, but I still go to him and I ask, politely of course, if the bike is still for sale but... he says no"

Mr Evans sincerely doubted Sirius Black could ever ask anybody anything politely and sure enough the other Marauders snorted at his words; "I don't think lecturing someone about keeping "guests" waiting and insulting their home constitutes polite"

Sirius waved a hand; "Whatever, I asked, he said no and so…"

"And so Padfoot here had a giant strop" smirked James

"Swearing, frowning…the works"

"So, naturally we took him out for a drink…"

"Only one became a couple and he soon became completely and totally _pissed_"

"He?" asked Lily

James nodded; "none of us felt the need to drown our sorrows" he frowned; "uh, yet"

Lily raised an eyebrow and Remus continued the tale, a pained look on his face; "Anyway the real disaster when we left, we were in a hurry, because, well Sirius looked like he might just throw up…"

"And he did"

"Right on, Mr Giant-growth-potion-not-selling-motorbike…"

Mr Evans jaw dropped open, just as Lily covered her mouth with her own hand; the Marauders it seemed, had the worst luck on the planet and Mr Evans was suddenly overcome with the desire to laugh, before realising a responsible adult would respond with concern and so with this in mind, he worked to keep a straight face as he asked what happened next.

"And this" announced James "is where my nobility comes in" The other Marauders rolled their eyes and Mr Evans curiosity grew.

"Nobility?"

"Well, from the look on Mr Giants face he wasn't in a very good mood, quite drunk too and so I couldn't very well leave Sirius against him and so" he puffed his chest out; _"I took him on"_

"More like, Padfoot was nearly passed out and you were the closest target"

James resolutely looked away from Peter; "I chose to fight the Giant in place of Padfoot and" he looked impressively at Lily;_ "I won"_

"you also got a broken nose, multiple bruises and were lying on the ground for ten minutes after he finished with you"

"And you only won" said Peter, "Because he was too drunk to take another shot"

James blushed and cleared his throat as Mr Evans, despite himself, started laughing. He knew it wasn't the adult thing to do, but, well, it was James Bloody Potter so of course he was going to laugh at the boy's misfortune.

"So you went back for more drinks, after that?"

"Well, we needed something after that but I guess, we erm, stayed longer than planned?"

Mr Evans shook his head and watched in amusement as Lily scolded James for getting into unnecessary trouble. He was quite ready after the exhausting day to head to bed, Sirius however seemed invigorated after telling his tale and soon proceeded to delve into the history of the Marauders and Mr Evans no longer intent on murdering anyone in the room (at least not yet) could enjoy the legendary tales and listen in awe and disbelief.

The tales lasted for an hour before Lily stood up announcing it was time for them all to get to bed, and Mr Evans could not help thinking that his daughter sounded very much like the mother of the four boys, the thought like most thoughts regarding the Marauders and his daughter brought him mixed feelings, for once however he let the amusement win out.

Stifling a yawn himself, he looked around at the four boys who were stretching and no doubt thinking of the tents that awaited them. Clearing his throat and trying to avoid direct eye contact Mr Evans spoke; "You, uh, you boys can sleep in here tonight…if you want that is…I mean, one of you can have the couch and I'm sure there's space…" he trailed off uncertainly but the boys beamed at him; "Thanks Mr Evans" Remus smiled and Mr Evans nodded gruffly before leaving the room, behind Lily.

He was back two minutes later.

Face stern and finger pointed at James Potter, he gave the father warning, he may have "accepted" the boy, but he was still a boy and therefore still required the warning; "You try any funny business Potter, and I mean anything and you will regret it, for the rest of your _miserable_ life"

James Potter (infuriatingly) merely smiled; "Wouldn't dream of it Sir"

Mr Evans glared, ignored Blacks ("Bet you do" to Potter) and left the room; he was in, he thought, for a long night.

**A/N; Hi! First off sorry for the very, very late update- I've had a lot of coursework and I've been going back to past chapters and sorting out some of the typos and secondly I know I said this would be the last chapter with the date and everything but somehow, this seemed a good place to end so I'm thinking next chapter will have Christmas and the date and then we'll have the epilogue.**

**This chapter was for some reason very hard to get in to and there're some bits i'm still not sure on (mainly the Marauders tale and Lily and Mr Evans conversation) but I really hope you enjoyed it! Please, please review- they are much appreciated :D**

**Thanks to anyone who has ever put this on there favourites/alerts- you guys motivate me!**

**And of course a big, big thanks to everyone that reviewed last chapter- *virtual cookies to you all!***


	9. Every Fathers Worst Nightmare

_**Every Fathers Worst Nightmare**_

**Or…**_**The Date**_

**In which there is the exchanging of presents, a Fedora and a restaurant in mayhem**

The morning after the real Christmas Day and the Evans households Christmas Eve Mr Evans was awoken, rather rudely or perhaps it could be called festively, by the Marauders cries of _"Merry Christmas" _seeping up through the floor boards_._ The four boys seemed to have been charged with so much energy during the night that it seemed impossible for them to stay still or indeed silent.

By the time Mr Evans had wiped the sleep from his eyes, cracked his back and hobbled down the stairs the four boys were dressed and sitting around the tree surrounded by a breakfast feast; "Took you long enough!" was Sirius's greeting as he practically shoved a bleary eyed Mr Evans on to the armchair.

Overwhelmed Mr Evans could only look to his daughter in shock; she seemed to be sharing his feelings at the boys' behaviour. Typical Evans Christmas' did not begin with loud shouts and greetings; no it was much more…_peaceful_. Petunia for one would refuse to allow present opening to commence till everyone had washed, changed and looked presentable enough (in case any of the neighbours came by, she would say).

Nevertheless, Mr Evans soon found himself enjoying this new found way of celebration, the Marauders seemingly endless store of energy was contagious and soon even Lily was laughing loudly and throwing her hair back in disbelief. Mr Evans watched on with a fond smile and soon Electrocuted Potter, sorry, James Potter was announcing it was time for presents to be exchanged. Mr Evans cringed, whilst he had of course made sure he had a present for his darling Lily, the boys…well, it wasn't his fault now was it? The plan had been for them to be exterminated or sent to space or anywhere far, far away so of course he hadn't even _thought _of buying presents for them.

"Right, so come on Prongs give Wormtail here his present…" Said Sirius rubbing his hands together in excitement.

James reached out for a small box wrapped in red and gold paper but before the parcel could even reach Peters awaiting hands Mr Evans had stood up; _"I, uh, I have to…do...uh, something" _He announced and then ignoring the boys and Lily's thoroughly confused expressions he made his way to the door; "Carry on, carry on I'll be back soon" he said with a wave of the hand. So ok, it wasn't the best or more creative excuse but it was Christmas Day, at least it was in his house and besides his brain was currently in a midst of a crisis; he was actually worried about not having presents for the Marauders- worried! How on earth had that happened? He felt a sweat bead form on his forehead and frowned as though trying to work out a particularly hard problem.

It wasn't that he cared for the Marauders …did he? No, no, he really didn't but well, it was common courtesy wasn't it? And they were guests, he was sure that he had heard something about giving to guests on one of his _very_ few visits to church…so yes, he was just being a good person fulfilling his duties. That was all; there were no…_emotions _involved. He shuddered, no definitely no emotions involved, in fact he was planning to give them second hand things. Second hand things that may actually have been third, fourth or fifth handed things which had _somehow_ ended up in his possession and into the dump room.

However, by the time he had reached said room Mr Evans had every mind of returning downstairs and watching the Marauders exchange gifts forgetting any idea of him gifting them but somehow he knew he wouldn't be able to. You see, it may have been hidden very deep down but as Mr John Evans walked up the stairs he realised he had unbelievably, strangely, miraculously grown _fond_ of the four boys and though he doubted they would have thought to have gotten _him_ a present, he knew without a doubt that they would have bought Lily something and he also knew or rather sensed that they would always look out for his youngest daughter. They were the type of friends that lasted forever; to whom the word betrayal was a foreign language, to who friendship actually meant family. And so he reckoned they deserved gifts, even if they were old pieces of useless junk (that may or may not turn out to be worth thousands in the distant future).

Twenty minutes later Mr Evans finally returned downstairs to find that the Marauders and Lily had already exchanged presents; they each were surrounded by boxes of chocolates and sweets, books or boxes of magical things Mr Evans did not recognise. James was currently holding an assortment of Quidditch supplies; a look of pure reverence on his very gawky face, Sirius was admiring a rather large poster of a motor bike. Remus, on the other hand, was staring avidly at the cover of a book on Magical Creatures and there place in society, whilst Peter looked like his mouth would at any moment explode from the amount of junk he had pushed in to it and Lily, well, Lily was holding a beautiful red and gold broach in the shape of the Gryffindor lion. Mr Evans did not need to ask who had given her the gift; not only did it seem like a very _Potterish_ thing to do but his daughter also happened to be looking from the broach in her hand to James every few seconds a soft expression on her face.

_Humph! _He thought, stupid Potter, stupid gift…his present was supposed to be the one that she stared at longest, his present was the one that she should have been holding not that stupid Potters…but he realised with a sad smile, there were worst boys than James Potter… even if he did have electrocuted hair, too long arms and body that looked like it belonged to a eleven year old.

"_Ahem"_ he announced his presence and the five teenagers turned around Lily looking ready to admonish him for his absence, in fact, all of them did (except for Peter who was still comically trying to swallow his mouth full of treats). Mr Evans however was not in the mood to listen to their whining and let them know so before announcing it was now time for _him_ to distribute presents. To say the Marauders looked shocked would have been an understatement, Remus was sitting with his mouth open and Peter finally succeeded in swallowing; _"What? You're…"_ but he was cut off by a beaming Sirius and James who practically jumped up in joy; "Well, give them here then".

Smiling Mr Evans made his way to his armchair with his bag of presents making him feel much like Father Christmas himself, when he sat down however he could not help the shiver of nervousness that he felt; _what if they didn't like it? What if they were offended by the second hand nature or what if they…_

He scoffed at himself, he was being ridiculous the Marauders seemed to be entranced by anything and everything and even if they didn't like their gifts, well, it was not as though he _cared_. He cleared his throat and chanced a glance at Lily before speaking; she had, he was pleased to see a proud smile on her face. Bracing himself he pushed a hand in to the bag and pulled out a pile of books, all classics including a very, very old copy of Grimm's fairy tales and a first edition Great Expectations. All five books had been read over and over by Agnes and he knew looking at them now that she would not have wanted them to stay deep in a pile of boxes. He cleared his throat; "Remus, these are for you. Now, you bloody well make sure you look after them you hear me? Passed down generations they were" he tried to give the sandy haired boy a stern look but the smile and utter shock on Lupins' face left him grinning.

"B…but…Are you sure Mr Evans? This is a first edition, you could get…"

"Oh just take the damn books will you boy" he said, practically thrusting them into Lupins' hands. _Some teenagers today, he thought, just too damn polite_. Sirius peered over at the books before wrinkling his nose. _Others, however, were uncivilised beasts._

Another rummage in his great big bag brought out a brown box; Mr Evans smiled; there was a part of him that wanted to run with this box all the way back into the dump room and hide it away. The stack of Superman and Popeye comics within had been his childhood companions (when he hadn't been out causing trouble) but Peter had seemed so genuinely interested in them yesterday and well, he didn't have any use for them now did he? Besides what else could he have given the Pudgy Potato? _A Victoria sponge?_

"Here you go Peter" he said with a smile; "it's the comics you were looking at yesterday." Peter jumped up excitedly, tripped, got up again, blushed profusely and then took the comics before sitting down, his hands moving over the box breathlessly until Sirius wacked him on the head and Remus and James gave him a_ Look_. It was a look that Mr Evans did not understand, Peter however did and a minute later he was thanking Mr Evans with his face so red that Mr Evans could not help but think he now resembled more of a red tomato than a pudgy potato.

Next came James gift and this time Mr Evans really was nervous; Potters gift was the only one not from the dump room, rather it was something he had spent an awful lot of time and effort on. Staying alone as a widow had given Mr Evans a lot of free time, you see, and whilst drinking beer, doing gardening and watching TV, not to mention trying to find the most unhealthy and fatty foods to eat were ok as hobbies Mr Evans had decided to try something new the past year. That something new happened to be wood cutting and yes, _yes,_ he knew it was _weird_ and strange and mildly embarrassing but in his defence it _had_ kept him busy and the only reason he had really joined the stupid class was because of Old Paul but that was beside the point, the point was that at home, safe from those who knew nothing of magic Mr Evans had took out an old book of Lily's and decided he wanted to make a broomstick. A mini one yes but a broomstick nonetheless.

He had analysed the cover of Quidditch through the Ages for hours upon hours until finally beginning his model. It had taken him six months of blood, sweat and … no, not tears but a lot of breaks to the pub before he had completed it and now, now he was going to give it to that bloody Potter. He was mad, completely and truly mad. Perhaps he'd been hoodwinked, yes, a little flick of his wand and now Potter had made him actually like him. He shuddered at the thought, he really was a terrible father; liking his daughters potential boyfriend- _ridiculous!_

And so it was with a heavy heart that Mr Evans finally pulled the wooden broomstick out of his bag of wonders; he had not spoken one word before James let out a shriek that was more on the girls scale than a teenage, nearly grown man scale, nevertheless the look of complete and utter joy on James Potters face made the heaviness in Mr Evans heart completely dissipate. He grinned as the boy pulled the wooden broom stick into his hand staring at it in amazement, he had not even said the broomstick was for him yet James seemed to have claimed it as his own. Rightly so of course, yet Mr Evans couldn't help but shake his head; the broomstick could, after all, have been for Sirius.

"_Bloody hell, bloody hell…Mr Evans where on earth did you get this_?" his tone was full of wonder and so it was with a distinct hint of pride that Mr Evans admitted the broomstick was off his own creation. Lily gasped and looked at him in shock; "Blimey dad, where did you learn to do this?" Mr Evans smiled and began telling his tale as all the other Marauders took turns in examining the broom. Finally, James Potter stood up beaming with a look in his eyes that made Mr Evans shudder; it was a look that said I want to give you _a big fat thank you hug_ and quite frankly Mr Evans was _not_ going to let that happen. He may have given the damn boy something of his own creation but hugs? They were strictly for family only and so Mr Evans stuck out an arm instead which James smirking at shook pompously as though he had just read every word in Mr Evans mind.

Mr Evans looked around at the four Marauders it was now he realised with a shock, time for him to hand Sirius Black his Christmas present.

He gulped.

He glanced at Lily.

He coughed.

He put a hand in the bag.

He froze.

He coughed again. And then again. And again.

"Li.." cough "Lily, could" _cough. Cough_. "Glass of water". _Cough._ "Please"

Lily was already half way to the door; "Just a minute DAD!" She shouted as she ran to the kitchen and James reached forward to hit Mr Evans on the back. The moment Lily had left though Mr Evans pushed James away and gestured for Sirius to come closer before pushing a white booklet into his hand; "The manual" Sirius stared wide eyed; _"What?"_

"The manual." He whispered, one eye peeled for the door and Lily's return; "I can't give you the" he mouthed motorbike "now but I promise you can come get it when you finish sch…"

"Dad! Are you ok?" Lily had returned with a glass of water and was now frowning as she looked between her father who was hunched in front of the Marauders and the Marauders themselves who all seemed to be frozen in place, before…

"_Bloody hell!"_

"_Merlin's beard"_

"You serious, Mr Evans?"

Mr Evans shook his head discreetly; "Yeah, yeah, you can have the rest of the comics Sirius" he finished with a significant look at Lily that made a look of mischief ignite in the smirking Marauders face. Sirius' face held a wide grin; "you are one great bloody man, Mr E, thank you. Seriously thank you"

Mr Evans grinned back before turning to his daughter; "Guess it's time for yours eh, flower?"

Lily smiled and moved closer to her father Mr Evans felt a lump in his throat as he realised just how big she had gotten before he finally reached for a small box under the Christmas tree; "Here you are, then" he said gruffly handing her the small blue wrapped box.

"Thanks Dad" she said with a smile, carefully opening the wrapping paper as the Marauders impatiently watched on. Mr Evans suddenly felt apprehensive as the last piece of wrapping paper fell off, goodness she was slow…would she like it? Love it? Or maybe it really wasn't her…she didn't really wear jewellery after all…

Suddenly, Lily let out a gasp and Mr Evans stared as she put a hand to her mouth, tears forming in her eyes; "Dad…wow, it's…it's beautiful!" and then before he knew it she was in his arms, just a little girl once again. Mr Evans cleared his throat; "Glad you like it Lilykins" he said stroking her hair. The pendant had been encrusted with emeralds and had a picture of Lily, Petunia along with himself and his Agnes; the photo had been taken a few years ago and Mr Evans knew it was one of Lily's' favourites. The moment beautiful as it was, was ruined suddenly by Peters; "So can we give you yours now?"

"What?" His eyes felt as though they could and would pop out of his eyes; the Marauders, _Marauders_ had brought him a present. Him. He shook his head in disbelief as the four boys beamed up at him.

"Didn't think we'd come empty handed did you, Mr E?"

They laughed and James reached back for a large rectangle parcel; "Wasn't easy y'know. Finding something for someone we never met"

"Yup, walked around for ages and ages in Hogsmeade and Diagon Alley and… "

"Anyway," cut in Remus; "Eventually, we just talked to Lily and then one day it hit us"

"Literally" Said Sirius with a smirk; "Right on Ol' Prongsies head"

Mr Evans gave a loud laugh and took the present, ripping the paper off much more savagely than Lily's careful tearing. The Marauders and Lily all watched in amusement until Mr Evans finally let out a; _"Cor Blimey!" _as the last of the wrapping paper fell off. In his hands lay a thick, leather bound book entitled; _"Quidditch (and other magical sports) for Zombies"._ Opening the cover he was greeted with page after page of moving pictures, displaying some of the best and worst moves in Quidditch history. His mouth dropped open in amazement; "Thank you, blimey, this is brilliant!"

The boys laughed and joked and told the tale of how the book had fallen on James head and given him a rather large red lump on his forehead, when they had visited a new bookshop-there last hope. He smirked at the boy before turning to his daughter; "What about you Flower- didn't think of getting your old dad anything?" Lily grinned before pulling out something from behind her back; "You said you wanted to have every day of our lives right? well, it's not every day but…" she smiled and handed him a beautifully decorated photo album filled with all his favourite pictures of Lily and Petunia that had previously been kept in haphazardly in a box and then there were pictures he had never seen before; Lily and the Marauders laughing at Hogwarts, Petunia sitting next to Vernon... He sniffed. He may have been a man and a quite old one at that but this was his daughters…he hugged Lily tight, ignoring the teasing voice of Sirius Bloody Black.

oOo

The rest of the day passed as a whirlwind. Literally. The wind howled furiously and the thin window frames shook, none of this however seemed to faze the inhabitants of number 64 Mills Crescent. After they had indulged in a big breakfast, sang a couple of Christmas carols (that left Mr Evans poor ears ringing for most of the day), preparations for a full blown Christmas lunch began. To say things were chaotic would be an understatement; everybody it seemed was determined to help and whilst more hands could sometimes equate to an easier task, the fact that the extra hands belonged to the Marauders meant any five minute job proceeded to take a whole half an hour (if not longer).

The reason for this was simple; each of the four boys with their eccentric personalities had a different way of doing things so naturally they needed to argue before even touching the parsnips and then when they finally reached an agreement, Mr John Evans would appear to tell them they were in fact doing the whole thing wrong. And perhaps even worse than her father was Lily, who seemed determined to keep everything under control but was failing miserably; you see Lily was also tasked with the job refereeing her father and the four raving lunatics; like the time when Mr Evans shoved Sirius out of the way because _he_ wanted to deal with the sprouts (a Christmas necessity) only for Sirius to fall on to Peter who preceded to drop the three layered trifle of Remus creation on to James.

So yes, all in all preparations for Christmas Dinner was an extremely eventful and frenzied affair but for Mr Evans the main attraction/event/incident did not occur until later in the day; it was only after the Marauders had played two games of twister ( which resulted quite unfortunately for James Potter with Peters bum on his face), one rather long game of Monopoly (in which Sirius cheated) and a rather great Christmas Dinner which included the pulling of crackers that he overheard Lily and James agree to meet in the backyard later that evening.

Mr Evans mind had whirred at that piece of information, not least because Lily had blushed profusely and James had had that stupid, idiotic grin on his face. He wanted, no _needed_ to know what was going on, what was Lily going to say to James or was it James who wanted to say something; were they planning a date… he frowned thoughtfully before deciding that the only solution was to eavesdrop. After all, he wasn't doing anything wrong, it was his _right_ to know what was going on between the two; for one it was his back garden in which they wanted to talk and two Lily was his daughter….not to mention he had been the one to get them to realise their feelings for each other, he thought smugly. Yes, it had all been him…and now, they didn't even think to tell him if they were dating…he harrumphed they didn't value him, that was the problem; _they just did not value him. _

This realisation, along with his desire to eavesdrop left Mr Evans making another plan and this one, if he did say so himself, was simply perfect. Genius, even. You see, the tents which he had so unceremoniously made the Marauders sleep in two nights ago were still there, in fact, he hadn't even gone to get his favourite pillow back and therefore he would simply and innocently go out to retrieve this things and then well, wait for the two teenagers to emerge and have their conversation with him safe in the tent. When they left, he would leave with the pillow…see, simple and fool proof, he smiled at his own brilliance, ignoring the strange looks he was being given as he rubbed his hands together excitedly.

Unfortunately for Mr Evans before he could commence his plan or indeed before Lily and James could talk about God knows what, there were a lot of dishes to be washed, dried and put away. All in all though, it was not too bad; sure Sirius dropped two plates, Peter let the sink overflow and both Remus and James landed in a heap because of it but really, to Mr Evans it could have been much, much worse; they were four raving lunatics after all.

Eventually though the time came a look on the clock told Mr Evans it was five to nine, the meeting was to take place at nine or so he had heard, which meant he needed to get out. Now. Only vaguely wondering where Remus, Sirius and Peter had disappeared to five minutes earlier, he made his way out. The rain had by now, mercifully stopped but the air was still cold as he hurried from his back door and in to the tent, where he planned to wait in silence.

This plan of silence however, backfired the moment Mr Evans entered as he found It already occupied by none other than the three other Marauders. He gave a yelp of shock and tumbled backwards, the Marauders rushed to help him up but before any of them could question him or indeed before Mr Evans could go on a long winded lecture of giving people heart attacks they heard backdoor open. All four froze in the tent and Mr Evans shared looks with the others; it seemed they too had heard of their friends meeting.

Crouching and holding his breath, Mr Evans strained to hear Lily's voice; "It was a great day, wasn't it?"

James laughed; "Chaotic, I think but great too"

"Yeah well, with the supposed Masters of Mischief around I was expecting _much_ worse"

James snorted; "Don't speak to soon, Evans. We still have time to set your kitchen on fire or…"

"Lily"

"What?" James asked confusedly, just as Mr Evans frowned.

"Lily, call me Lily."

There was a silence before James spoke again, Mr Evans could practically hear the smile in his voice; "You're right, I can't go calling my girlfriend by her surname now can I?"

Mr Evans nearly jumped up and was only prevented from shouting aloud by Remus putting a hand over his mouth; he was her boyfriend now? Bloody boyfriend? When the hell did that happen?

"Girlfriend? I said one date James Potter, one date…"

"Trust me Lils, one date and you'll be professing your love for me" James finished dramatically.

Mr Evans rolled his eyes; smarmy git.

Lily however laughed; "So what are we going to do, y'know about my dad and the others, should we tell them…I mean, what if we do and they make a big deal out of it all and dad goes all protective and Sirius will never shut up and to be honest I wouldn't be surprised if they bloody followed us there and …"

"Lily!" but Lily's worries seemed too much and her rambling continued as Mr Evans and the Marauders exchanged glances; they weren't that bad were they? He shook his head, no Lily was just overreacting, yeah maybe he was currently eavesdropping but he wasn't making a big deal out of the date. He wasn't!

"Lily, calm down!" James let out a laugh; "Look, they'll get excited but come on! I don't think they'd spy on us and…."

"You obviously don't know them" Lily huffed, as the Marauders and Mr Evans exchanged guilty looks.

"Trust me I do! And like I said they'll be excited but can you imagine how they'd react if they find out we didn't tell them? They'd go bonkers, especially your dad so…I think we should tell them"

Lily gulped; "Fine then, you can tell them"

"Are you a Gryffindor or what?...Fine, fine, I'll tell them" and Mr Evans suspected, Lily had bestowed James with a glare.

Within the tent, the three Marauders and Mr Evans sat frozen; Remus was looking rather shamefaced- Mr Evans suspected it was due to the fact that James apparently had utter faith in them all, but then again it seemed James Potter was the type of person who would always have faith in his friends; he perhaps naively believed in the best in everybody. This thought made Mr Evans feel slightly guiltier, especially since he could imagine what James would be going through when he attempted to break the news of the date.

A couple of days ago, James Potters apparent discomfort would have brought Mr Evans immense happiness but a lot had changed in the past few days and Mr Evans thought he wouldn't be able to savour the feeling of a stuttering James Potter with the guilt of his eavesdropping. If only there was something he could do…

And then it hit him.

oOo

Beside Mr Evans Sirius and Peter were whooping in joy, clapping hands and doing strange sorts of victory dances; "he did it! He did it! Told you she liked him Moony". They had waited only a minute after Lily and James had left before they had started their celebrations.

Remus laughed and shook his head. Peter smiled; "Thank Merlin, at least now we never, _ever_ have to listen to his pining again"

Sirius grinned; "Ah! I'm going to miss those days- all the moaning, the plans…."

"This date might not go all that well, you know" Mr Evans felt the need to put in.

Sirius waved an impatient hand; "of course, it'll bloody well go right. They're going to end up married by next year, you mark my words and then there'll be little Prongslits and …."

Mr Evans gulped and decided it was time for him to leave. Sirius Blacks words had been making his stomach churn and so he wobbled his way out the tent and in to the house to find Lily and James and execute his most brilliant of plans.

"Lily dear?" He called out and soon found her in the lounge besides James Potter. He beamed.

"Been looking all over for you two, there's uh, something I wanted to say"

The two exchanged glances and Mr Evans cleared his throat; "Uh, so you both know what …what I did the other day and I'm sorry, I really am for interfering but I've been watching you two today and …" he scratched his head; "uh I reckon you should give it ago…I mean, I…" he blushed a bright red, unsure now of what to say; his plan had been to prevent the obviously awkward situation of James breaking the news of a date, a date he already knew about but…well, he had now somehow managed to put himself in an even more awkward situation.

He looked up to see James sitting shell shocked and Lily looking as though she was having a difficulty not laughing; "You uh, you mean take Lily on a date?" James finally asked a hand in his raven hair.

Mr Evans took a deep breath; "Yeah, go on a…uh, date…tomorrow or" he cleared his throat again; "whenever"

James beamed; "You know what Mr Evans I think I will do that." He turned rather dramatically to Lily; "Lily, would you please take your dear father's advice and allow me to take you out on a wonderful date tomorrow"

Lily giggled slightly, much to Mr Evans surprise; "Well, since _my dad_ thinks it's a good idea; sure"

James winked at her and Mr Evans suddenly blushed; he was such as fool! Why oh, why had he put himself in this situation; now his daughter and James Bloody Potter thought he was a lunatic…he harrumphed; wasn't his fault, he thought automatically.

Later that evening James and Lily told the other Marauders of their date and Mr Evans was shocked to say that the three boys did a rather good job of being _"shocked"_ and excited for their friends. Sirius took credit for everything naturally, claiming he had been the one to make them realise their long lost feelings for each other and that he fully expected to be godfather to their firstborn. Mr Evans had chocked on his glass of water, spraying most of it on a surprised Peter whilst both James and Lily had blushed profusely reiterating that it was _"only a date"._

oOo

When they awoke on the twenty seventh of December the air was crisp and rather cold but nevertheless, the day was beautiful. Lily and James however both seemed overcome by nerves, James passing Lily on the stairs preceded to trip and land on his face, Lily herself nearly cracked an egg over the toaster instead of into the frying pan and each seemed completely unable to look at the other for more than a second before their cheeks turned a bright pink. And so they both began avoiding each other and most of the day passed tensely, with James muttering to himself or looking to his fellow Marauder in desperation and Lily hiding in her room. All in all, Mr Evans found the whole thing simply hilarious; when they had first arrived the two had been all for acting as a couple, sitting close to each other, holding hands but now that the time had come to go on an _actual date_ both looked as though they would like nothing more than to run fifty miles in the opposite direction just at the sight of each other.

It had been decided (by Lily, who apparently knew of James Potters extravagant nature and wanted none of it) that they would be going to the new restaurant just outside town. They would leave at seven. By five past five, Lily was already in frenzy; Mr Evans could hear her upstairs moving to and fro and could only imagine what she was up tp. By six fifteen, James looked like he was going to faint and it took the combined effort of Remus, Peter and Sirius to convince him it was time to get ready. James had given a strangled sort of moan and proceeded to ramble about "messing things up" and "dropping drinks on her" and other nonsense to which a bemused Remus had told him to "just be himself". To be honest, Mr Evans did not whole heartedly agree with this piece of advice; James Potter as himself was a bumbling fool who talked rubbish ninety-nine per cent of the time and here Remus Lupin was encouraging him to spew even more nonsense. He shook his head but stayed silent. You see his mind was whirring. Again.

Yes, he may have encouraged the date and all but well, it didn't mean he wasn't curious about what was going to happen. Would it be a disaster? Or would it be absolutely, bloody brilliant?

And yes, yes_, yes_, he knew that the two of them would most probably recount the tale but knowing Lily she would most probably leave out significant details and James well James would probably over exaggerate every bleeding factor. No, he needed to witness this date for himself. He scratched his head thoughtfully for what felt the millionth time; what he needed he realised was a disguise…

His mind wandered to the boxes he had explored yesterday, hmm, and then he grinned broadly an image of a black fedora coming into his mind. It was perfect, Lily would never suspect him of wearing a fedora and if he found an old coat or something and left after them, well he could go enjoy a meal at the new restaurant too and really, nobody could say anything because if a man was hungry a man had to eat and he had been meaning to go to that restaurant for ages. In fact_, he had a voucher_. He nodded smugly.

Lily came downstairs at five to seven and stood in the hall way dressed in a brown skirt, high boots and a green shirt. Her hair was down and Mr Evans could not help but beam; his daughter was beautiful, too beautiful too be worthy of _any_ man let alone James Potter but alas, what could he do; both his daughters seemed determined to not say single. He sighed; the woes of a father!

When James Potter was finally pushed into the hall by his friends, his black hair looking more electrocuted than ever before, his face pale, and his eyes nervous it was seven o'clock, on the dot. Mr Evans suddenly felt a great desire to laugh at the stumbling boy before him even Lily cracked a smile and shook her head fondly. Mr Evans gave her a hug, gave Potter the customary father warning, told them to be back by half ten before pushing them out of the door. They would be going by a magic bus that Mr Evans was told was called the "night bus".

Lily and James had barely left before Mr Evans was eager to leave too, but first he needed his disguise; barely listening to Sirius saying he and the others were going out Mr Evans took two steps at a time until he reached the upstairs landing. Twenty minutes later, dressed in a black leather jacket, black trousers and a black fedora (looking quite _debonair_ in his opinion) Mr Evans made his way outside. He was not stupid enough to use his own car and so borrowed Old Pauls; it was a small, red ford which usually backfired upon starting and was prone to breaking down, no matter how much Mr Evans worked on it. Now, however, Mr Evans thought of none of that; he was a man on a mission. A man on a mission to spy on his daughter, something he had managed to convince himself was highly ethical and something every father should do.

Reaching the restaurant, Mr Evans parked before walking nervously towards the door, his eyes fixed to the floor. Entering Mr Evans made a quick scan of the place, noting that James and Lily were sitting near the window at the back of the restaurant; James was talking animatedly, all nervousness apparently forgotten and Lily was laughing, clutching her stomach.

"Excuse me, Sir?"

"Huh?" Mr Evans turned to see a waitress in front of him. "Table for one?" she asked a frown on her face and Mr Evans wondered just how long she had been standing in front of him. Before he could answer however he was rather unceremoniously pushed forward; "Bloody Nora!" he cried out as he turned to see a sandy haired man before him quickly bending to pick up the woolly hat he had dropped; "_Remus?"_ he asked, shocked.

The man froze before standing up; "Mr Evans? What are you doing…"

Mr Evans grabbed Remus by the upper arm and pulled him out of the restaurant door, leaving a bewildered waitress behind.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asked eyes wide and slightly manic; trust Lupin to ruin his perfectly constructed plan.

"What are _you_ doing here?" asked Remus eyebrow raised, as he shrugged Mr Evans off.

They stared at each other for a moment before Mr Evans sighed and stood back; "Guess I'm not the only who thought of spying again then?"

Remus shifted in the brown, over large Jacket which gave him the look of a rather underfed child; "I didn't _want _to, but Sirius insisted and we all know James is just going to exaggerate"

Mr Evans nodded sagely; "Hmm and Lily will probably stay tight-lipped"

Remus nodded in agreement.

"So where're Peter and Sirius then?" Mr Evans inquired, peering around.

Remus sighed and put a hand in one of the many pockets of his jacket, before finally lifting up a small rat. Mr Evans instantly took a step back, shuddering; "Bloody Nora! Why on earth do you have a rat in your pocket?" He looked at Remus as though questioning the boys' sanity.

Remus rolled his eyes, as the rat gave Mr Evans what looked like a reproachful glare; "It's not a rat. Well, it is but it's, uh, Peter." He ran a hand through his hair tiredly and Mr Evans gulped; "What do you mean, it's Peter?"

"It's Peter, magic remember" he said with a small smile and Mr Evans gaped; "Magic, right, right, of course"

Remus nodded, his lip twitching at Mr Evans reaction; "Anyway" Remus continued; "He's going to be our ears tonight, all he has to do is get near enough to the two of them then he can report back to us later"

Mr Evans shook his head, the situation becoming too strange for his aging mind to cope with; "And, and...uh…Sirius?" he asked, almost scared to hear the answer.

"Already in there, we caused a distraction before you got here and got him in as…uh…a dog"

Mr Evans stared at Remus blankly; "A dog?"

Remus smirked; "Yes, a dog anyway he's under that table at the moment" he pointed through the window "and I…" he glanced at Mr Evans; "_We _should probably get there now"

Mr Evans paused then just as Remus began making his way to the door he said; "Nice costume by the way" The long beige coat, the woolly hat that went over his ears and nearly over his eyes, made Remus Lupin look like a rather eccentric business man. Remus smirked; "Yours is not to bad either Mr Evans." Mr Evans blushed and together the two, along with the rat, made their way into the restaurant.

Sitting down and holding the menu close to his face Mr Evans tried his best to spy on his daughter and her new significant other; both seemed to be having a rather good time and Mr Evans was thankful to see that no…uh…vomit-inducing scenes had yet taken place. There had been some hand holding yes, but as far as he could tell their hands were the only things that had touched; something that eased his mind. Next to him Remus was scowling in irritation as the dog, Mr Evans shook his head, _Sirius_ felt the need to constantly try and put his paws on to Lupins shoes, slobbering all over the leather.

They had been sitting there fifteen minutes and had already turned away one waitress when another appeared asking for an order. Mr Evans knew he was on a mission and he knew he really shouldn't but as he glanced back down at the menu and spotted a great big chocolate gateau his stomach growled and so he decided to order a slice (only for himself of course).

Cake ordered, Mr Evans resumed his spying; "What do you think they're talking about?" he asked Remus.

Remus rather rudely answered through gritted teeth; "I. Don't. Know."

Mr Evans looked at him, sniffed and turned away, ignoring the fact that he had already asked Remus the same question over six times.

"He's leaning forward. _He's leaning forward_" he hit Remus on the arm; "Why the hell is your friend leaning forward?"

He gripped Remus arm tighter and Remus apparently having had enough of the dog licking his shoes and Mr Evans constant questioning answered a bit louder than necessary; "I don't know! Maybe she has food in her teeth, maybe something poked his bloody back, maybe he wants to kiss her because what's that? _Ah, yes they're on a date!"_ His voice had got progressively louder as he went on and Mr Evans watched shell shocked as most of the restaurant quietened, he ducked his head quickly as even Lily and James turned around. In all honesty, Mr Evans did not know whether to scold Remus for nearly blowing their cover or to thank him as James was now sitting back against his chair; just the way he should!

Remus, however, seemed rather embarrassed about his outburst and mumbled a quick apology that Mr Evans waved away at the arrival of his simply delicious looking chocolate gateau.

"Hmm" he dug in with relish, occasionally updating Remus who had his back to Lily and James on how their date seemed to be going.

"Now really, does he need to hold her hand all evening" he said as James placed a hand on Lily's again.

Remus bit his lip as though repressing a retort with much difficulty and Mr Evans went back to his gateau. Time ticked on with not much to report, the dog underneath seemed determined to stick its head out every now and then and Mr Evans had great pleasure in kicking it (albeit not to hard) but other than James being rather cliché (in the opinion of Mr Evans) by leaning forward to wipe a bit of something from Lily's face not much happened. The evening wore on and Mr Evans ordered a second gateau and a glass of wine, the problem however came when Remus turned around and noted that Lily and James looked as though they were about to leave and indeed when Mr Evans looked towards their table he saw that both had nearly finished their deserts and decided it was probably time to leave the restaurant (rather than waiting for them to walk past his table).

He indicated to a waiter for the bill and waited anxiously wondering how on earth Remus was planning to get Sirius out of the restaurant.

The waiter returned a minute later and that, well, that is when disaster struck. You see, when Mr Evans had left home that evening he had not considered the fact that he may actually buy anything and naturally preoccupied as he was with his daughters date had not brought any money with him. Not one pound, not one credit card, or god damn voucher- nothing.

At All.

This realisation left Mr Evans patting the pockets of a leather jacket he had not worn in years for some left over money. There was nothing. Blushing he asked the waiter to come back and looked up to see a curious Remus staring at him; "You don't, uh, have any money on you?" he asked gruffly.

Remus eyes widened; "Money, uh…" he rummaged through his own pockets before pulling out a handful of coins Mr Evans did not recognise; "Not muggle" he answered looking at Mr Evans who gulped; this restaurant was not only new but rather expensive. And while most restaurants in town would have known him, this new establishment was _outside_ of town and so there were no friends to somehow bail him out.

"What about Sirius?" he asked quite desperately. Remus shrugged; "Uh, I really don't know Mr Evans" he said apologetically.

Mr Evans nodded and then taking a deep breath got on to his knees and stuck his head under the table; the sight was…well, ridiculous but thankfully most diners were too busy eating to notice the sight of a middle aged man on the floor. Underneath the table Mr Evans was greeted with a large black dog whose eyes were now wide in shock; he nudged it before whispering, feeling rather stupid; he was talking to a _dog_ after all.

"Do you have any money?" he asked.

The dog stared before nodding his head.

Mr Evans sighed in relief; "Muggle Money?"

The dog nodded once more and Mr Evans rubbed his hands together excitedly; "Can you, uh, give, that is, borrow me some" The dog stared before nodding again; "Like as a dog…or…"

The dog rolled its eyes and Mr Evans beamed, before he could move to get up however disaster struck.

You see it was all down to a waitress, who humming slightly and with hands laden with plates full of food was making her way to table number four and then there was Mr Evans crouched on the floor head under the table. Since costumers sitting with their heads under the table was not…ah, part of the _norm_, the humming waitress did not have her eyes peeled for them which meant she walked directly into Mr Evans, tripped, screamed and sent food flying.

Mr Evans lifted his head up in shock, hit it on the table, swore and then crawled out to find Remus standing up mouth open. In fact most of the restaurant was standing up; a couple who seemed to be making their way to a table had frozen, arms up gravy covering their faces and what looked like parsnips in their hair. Had he not been involved or partly responsible for the disastrous situation, Mr Evans would have laughed, as it was all he could do was stand blankly; his mind not even registering that Lily and James had now walked forward, Lily sporting a furious expression whilst James simply looked on in amusement. "Dad?" she said eyes flashing; Mr Evans supposed he had somehow lost his fedora in the whole under the table fiasco.

He held up his hands; "I…uh" but before he could articulate any further something to make the situation much worse happened. Mr Evans had always suspected that Sirius Black did not possess any brains or in fact any sort of sense and Sirius at that moment confirmed as much by sticking first one paw out of the table, (which in self would not have been so disastrous) followed by his whole shaggy head. Mr Evans suspected the strange silence had captured his curiosity. The women covered in gravy noticed the head of a large black dog and shrieked pointing at it dramatically before proceeding to hide behind her muscular husband as though for protection. Mr Evans resisted the urge to snort with much difficulty; _seriously, he thought, it was a dog not a bleeding monster!_

The dog, that is, Sirius looked rather like a deer caught in headlights which was strange thought Mr Evans considering he was in fact_, a dog_. Before he had the chance to ponder this more however, a small rat scurried to the front of the scene succeeding in making the already catastrophic situation, deteriorate further. The arrival of a rather large rat in a restaurant naturally caused discord; diners stood up in shock, many shrieked, crying out at how totally "unhygienic" it was, Mr Evans distinctly heard man shouts to "see the manager" and watched (in amusement) as a balding man, with a bulging stomach that had been shuffling food down his throat throughout the previous mayhem, quickly put down his form.

It was all too much; from the food covered couple, to the waitress still on the floor, to the peaking dog, scurrying rat, stunned costumers, not to mention a bewildered looking James and Lily… the situation had become a nightmare. He wanted nothing more than to disappear into the ground at the moment, not that he felt he had anything to be blamed for. _Not at all_. Yes, maybe it had been his idea to come… _spy _BUT…

Did _he_ tell the Marauders to come?

Did _he_ tell Sirius to become a dog?

Did _he_ tell Peter to become a rat?

No, no and _no_!

So was it his fault as an innocent father merely concerned for his daughters' welfare?

_Of course not!_

Lily and James could easily have had a peaceful dinner at home, he thought glumly, and then all this rubbish could have been averted. He shook his head, yes this was all Lily's and the Marauders fault; he had no blame whatsoever! He chose to ignore the fact that had he been told to have his first date at home he would have undoubtedly screamed in outrage and most definitely still have gone out.

Unfortunately for Mr Evans, his fault or not, the next few minutes were equally chaotic; the arrival of the rat (_Peter,_ Mr Evans reminded himself) seemed to have forced people out of their stupor and after the cries of "unhygienic" and threats of "complaints to the health and safety office" died down, most people either walked out or began demanding refunds from unnerved workers who seemed at a complete loss at what to do. The restaurant which had been in silence only minutes previously now sounded as they though it was a hosting a bunch of hyenas, lions and screeching hawks. Mr Evans flinched at the noise and it was only with the arrival of the manager that he received blessed reprieve; a portly man, about the same size of Mr Evans with a greying moustache he had whistled until the restaurant had once more fallen into silence.

And then (with what Mr Evans saw as military precision) he began to try and make sense of the unravelling disorder. A waitress was told to help clean up the husband and wife who were still soaked in food, a box was retrieved which he finally managed to trap poor Peter in. It had taken the manager ten whole minutes to run after Peter, it was only after he had pushed several tables and costumers aside, crawled on the floor and nearly broken his back that he managed to secure the box over the grey rat. Mr Evans had found the situation simply hilarious and then felt guilty because, well, it was Peter and he was currently locked in a box. Remus was standing mouth open and horror struck, but James like Mr Evans seemed torn between concern for his friend and laughter at the sheer absurdity of the situation.

Next, the manager tried to assure the many costumers that his restaurant had the highest standards of hygiene and he would be happy to have another inspection. For the time being however he offered them all refunds. Mr Evans had felt decidedly guilty at that point and looking at Remus he knew the boy felt the same; after all it had been their actions that had led to costumers being covered in food and rat to be spotted; a rat that …well, wasn't even a rat. He tugged at his shirt collar suddenly feeling extremely uncomfortable and ok, he'd admit it, a tad ashamed of his actions. Finally, the manager turned to Lily and James and apparently unaware that they knew Mr Evans or Remus proceeded to apologise to them for the mayhem and assured them that they would not have to pay for the meal. James however gave what Mr Evans noted to be enough to pay for much, much more than one meal and ignoring the managers' protests pulled Lily towards the door. James generosity did nothing to ease the feeling of guilt building up within Mr Evans and when Lily passed by him without any sign of recognition, he for once, had to admit he probably deserved it.

This was why he tried not to feel too bad as the manager, now sweating and red faced, told him and Remus off. Mr Evans stood arms at his sides and nodding to everything the man said, whilst Remus kept his gaze firmly to the floor, Sirius on the other hand, sat head on his paws watching with what Mr Evans recognised as mischief in his eyes. The managers speech was not short and not painless; seemingly on a roll and with the burden that he had made a severe loss in money he seemed determined to take out his anger on someone and proceeded to lecture them on why dogs were not allowed in the restaurant, why people should read notices before entering restaurants and the dangers of crawling under tables to feed said dogs. Mr Evans thought it would probably be best not to mention that he had in fact been asking the dog for money and not feeding it.

The overall feeling was as if he was once again eleven years old and awaiting his punishment from his headmaster and just like he had done in his youth, Mr Evans soon stopped listening and instead began admiring the décor of the restaurant; it was a bit…stuffy for his liking but…Ah! That painting was nice… he wondered how much it cost…

Just as he began an internal debate of whether the said item would go for two hundred or three hundred pound at auction, the managers voice went an octave higher and Mr Evans realised it was time for punishment. However, unlike his school days in which it was a cane to the hand Mr Evans punishment now was a lifetime ban to the restaurant, which was a shame really since that gateau had been simply _delicious._

When they finally left the restaurant Mr Evans breathed in the night air and sighed in relief; the situation he realised could have been much worse, sure the restaurant may have lost _a lot_ of clientele but it really could have been worse. And then he remembered Peter and the box and turned wide eyed to Remus who perhaps reading his mind merely nodded behind him where next to Old Pauls ford stood Lily arms folded besides James who was clapping a pale faced Peter on the back.

Trying to quench the fear he felt at the sight of his daughter red face, Mr Evans made his way to the car. He gave Lily a nervous smile which she did not return. "How'd you get out?" Remus asked Peter but it was James who answered with a shrug and smirk; "had the cloak so I sneaked back and rescued little Wormtail"

Wormtail scowled at the "little" before smirking himself; "I did hear your whole date y'know" Prongs". James hit him on the head; "and you're going to pay for that, you too Moony and you Padfoot" he added with a nod to the dog. Padfoot gave a loud bark and jumped on to James who laughing turned to Mr Evans; "Don't worry Mr Evans, I'm not the one punishing you…Lily has that honour" he finished with a costmary smirk as Mr Evans gulped; "shall, shall we get going then?" he asked with a nervous look towards his daughter.

It was a tight fit in the car, small as it was; Mr Evans drove, Lily sat in the front passenger seat and James, Remus and Peter sat at the back Padfoot lounging across them. They sat in silence for a while, each thinking over the nights events before Mr Evans, in a bid to break it said; "good evening, wasn't it?"

Nobody answered him.

oOo

When they finally arrived at 64 Mills crescent, Mr Evans was more than relieved, inside a nice cup of tea and his armchair awaited him. It was only when he reached the front door that he realised that not only had he forgotten his money before leaving but also his house keys. After doing a silent and unsuccessful prayer in the hope that the keys could magically materialise, Mr Evans finally had to admit to his stone faced daughter that he had in fact left the keys at home. She didn't smile or shake her head fondly at this forgetfulness as she usually would but then again Mr Evans supposed having your father spy on your first date would put you out, to say the least.

He sighed; _she'd forgive him by morning, right?_

When she did open the door she let Padfoot, Remus, Peter and Mr Evans himself in before shutting the door, leaving herself and James in the night air. In the hallway, all four froze before suddenly Padfoot became Sirius right before Mr Evans eyes. He jumped back in shock, ignoring the Marauder snickers; it had been...amazing...just instantaneous..._poof!_ And the dog was gone and Sirius was there. He shook his head in amazement and Sirius smirked; "so are we going to that window or what?"

Mr Evans paused; he really, really shouldn't, he'd done _more_ than enough spying and eavesdropping and he had to admit that it had caused him more harm than benefit but...

"What are we waiting for?" Sirius grinned and practically ran into the living room, an excited Peter following, Remus sighed, shaking his head before he too rushed into the living room with them. Mr Evans sighed; it's the last time, he promised himself, the last time.

Once in the living room, the four of them pushed the curtains apart roughly and then proceeded to stick their heads to the window trying desperately to see into the dark night. Fortunately for our four spies, a lamppost clearly illuminated Lily and James who were standing in front of each other holding hands. Lily said something and Mr Evans watched as James threw his head back in roguish laughter. His daughter blushed and Mr Evans watched with increasing trepidation as James carefully put a strand of her hair behind her ear.

A lump formed in his throat.

And then suddenly, completely unaware that her father was watching Lily tiptoed and pulled James head closer. That was it; they had kissed. Mr Evans looked down; on the one hand he wanted to stride out there right now and beat the hell out of James Potter, pulling him limb for limb but… he hadn't missed the smile on his daughters face and with a sinking feeling he realised her happiness really did lie with James fish face, electrocuted hair Potter. Beside him the marauders gave a loud raucous cheer, whooping and clapping hands, Sirius wolf whistled and the couple outside on the snowed filled road turned to the window James shaking his head in laughter and Lily rolling her eyes but nevertheless smiling as she leant her head into James arms; she was too happy it seemed to be angry that her first kiss with James potter had not been private.

The lump in Mr Evans throat swelled but at the same time he felt somehow light, as though he had been running a hundred miles in the blistering heat and was finally allowed to rest; whatever makes them happy, he reminded himself, _whatever makes them happy._

* * *

><p><strong>AN: And there it is! The final chapter of this story and it is way, way overdue. I really, honestly did not think it would take this long to put up; I started it immediately after finishing the other one but then I got writers block and I just ended up deleting the whole thing and before I knew it I had exams and life got in the way but I am incredibly sorry! And an even bigger sorry and massive thank you to _Souhait_ who reviewed nearly every chapter and printed some out; I know I promised it sooner but I hope you enjoyed this one.**

**Anyway, I realised reading back on the past chapter that there were a lot of typos- sorry about that! I think I've fixed most of them but if you notice any in this chapter please let me know. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, it's the longest one by far and I'm not sure if I like the ending but I really, really hope it was worth the wait- please review let me know what you think!**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, favourited or alerted this story; you're all amazing and have kept me going with this story :D **

**There is an epilogue which should hopefully be up tomorrow :)**


	10. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

_**6 months later**_

_**In which fate is rather harsh on Mr John Evans**_

It was nearing the end of June and the British weather finally seemed willing to allow the sun to shine; after months of rain, gloom and harsh winds summer had officially come. Mr Evans sat in his kitchen the sunlight filtering through the windows, light glistening on his recently cleaned surfaces; the entire kitchen looked, for once, quite pristine. In front of him sat a cup of tea, his third that day and it was not even past eleven. He shook his head slowly before taking another sip tea, he thought, was the best form of therapy. You see, poor Mr Evans, had been going through a rough patch. A very rough patch, actually and it was all down to his daughter or rather his daughters' _significant other_, he sniffed at the word, there was nothing _significant_ about Vernon Dursley apart from his rather large stomach and his resemblance of a walrus.

Of course, Petunia did not agree with him on this assessment, no, she was quite happy to call the Walrus her _fiancé _and within a few short months her husband. Mr Evans shuddered at the word, dreaded images from _that _day entering his mind, from the day Vernon Bloody Dursley thought it would a good idea to propose to his daughter, without even asking her father's permission first, no less.

It had been in a restaurant, a restaurant Mr Evans had been banned from a mere a few months ago, not that Petunia or Vernon were aware of this. This meant Mr Evans had to make sure to keep his bent at the arrival of a certain manager prowling the tables, eyes out for any dogs; however the sore neck he received because of said bending was not the worst thing of the evening, not by far. You see, as well Petunia and the Walrus there was also the Walrus family; Mr and Mrs Dursley made the gigantic Vernon look small and Mr Evans practically minute; they each required two chairs and felt the need to look down upon everyone in the restaurant; the Waiter at the door had hair much _too_ brown, the waitress who served them was an inch too short and apparently the child on the table next to them had funny knees. As if that wasn't enough, Mr Evans had the _pleasure_ of sitting next to Vernon's sister; a one Miss Margery Dursley who Mr Evans concluded was the worst of them all. Not only did she drink an awful lot, never shut up about her dogs but also seemed determined to comment on Mr Evans attire; _"Now, Sir, where did you say you bought your suit?"_ Mr Evans resisted, with much difficulty, the urge to throw his wine over her head.

And then there was Vernon Dursley himself and the event that took place just before desert. Seemingly out of now where two Violinist had appeared both dressed in bright white suits, Vernon had (quite comically and painfully) sang along to _"Tiptoe through the tulips_", Mr Evans had wanted to laugh, that is until Vernon got down on one knee, before Petunia who gave a rather loud shriek. All laughter forgotten, Mr Evans had watched horror struck as Vernon asked _the question_. Time seemed to have stopped. _Say no, please say no_! But Petunia had said yes, there was a ring; a big ostentatious thing, the price of which Vernon was quite happy to repeat over and over.

The only salvation for Mr Evans had been that Vernon had proceeded to get stuck on the floor, his body so large he had difficulty getting up from its one knee position and Mr Evans had watched with great amusement as one by one the whole Dursley family along with Petunia had tried to pull him up.

Mr Evans snorted, breaking out of his reverie and away from the memory of Vernon Dursley on the floor. The next few months had consisted of a severe reduction in his bank balance, trips to over _eighteen _different florists and a lesson on the very significant differences between beige, cream and white and the effects each colour could have on an invitation. To say that things had been chaotic would have been an understatement, Mr Evans had never felt so exhausted and the only thing stopping him from praying that time hurry up already was the fact that time hurrying up would mean him walking his daughter down the aisle sooner.

He shuddered at the horrific thought.

The only thing keeping him sane at this point was the fact that whilst Petunia may have been getting married; Lily and James obviously had no plan to follow their example. He had, since the months after Christmas come to the conclusion that James Potter was indeed destined to become his son-in-law, the only reason for this not happening as far as he could see would be if the idiotic boy broke his daughter's heart and somehow he couldn't see that happening. He was, if not happy, at least content with James Potter as a potential son-in-law and was comforted by the fact that obviously Lily and James would only tie the knot in _another four or five years_, if not more. They were only out of school, for God's sake! Surely, marriage was not on the cards.

Somewhat comforted by this thought, Mr Evans re-read the two pieces of parchment in front of him; one each from Lily and James, respectively. Both assured him they would be arriving the next day at approximately four o' clock with the other marauders and James parents, they also both reported on their exams going "well enough". Lily's also included two paragraphs in which she stated just why she did not want to be in her sister's wedding; _"of course I'll be there dad but bridesmaid? Are you crazy? Do you want your favourite daughter dead?"_

Whilst James had also featured a note from Sirius; _"hope you got the bike ready Mr E"_ and an enigmatic message about fulfilling a promise. Mr Evans could not for the life of him remember what promise James was referring too but decided not to dwell on it; chances were it was something that involved a lot mayhem and he decided he preferred being happy and clueless than worried mad because of another Marauder prank.

Not that he minded a prank or two, no not at all. In fact Mr Evans had taken a page out of the Marauders book and had managed to survive the wedding preparations of his eldest daughter only by the joy of creating his own pranks. For example, after Marge's latest dog had chased him around the garden for the second time, Mr Evans had had great pleasure in taking it as far away as possible and hiding it from her, unfortunately Marge seemed to have a _dog radar_ and had found him a mere three days later.

Mr Evans had not been too disappointed at this; he had after all had three days of peace. He smiled, now was not the time to worry about the past or Marge. Tomorrow he would see Lily after months and the Marauders who, though he would not admit it, he was missing. _And _he would finally meet James parents; the house was clean, food was prepared now all he had to do was wait. He looked at the clock, there was one whole day left to go and he could barely wait; with Lily, the Marauders, excellent food tomorrow was bound to be a _good _day.

Oh, how wrong he was.

Yes, Lily did arrive, along with the Marauders and Mr and Mrs Potter and yes, they all got along _just fabulously_. Mr Evans found himself in awe of James' parents, who though old were hilarious and enjoyed a good joke and a cup of tea.

And yes, the food was simply scrumptious; everyone ate to their hearts content. The Marauders joked around as usual, James winking at Lily, Sirius hitting Peter on the head, Peter eating as much as he could, Remus watching with a wry smile, Lily fondly telling them all off.

It was all just brilliant.

That is, until _James bloody, electrocuted hair, fish face, gawky Potter_ decided to ruin everything! The boy and yes, he was a boy and not a man suddenly and rather abruptly got on to one knee. Mr Evans saw red; _not another one, not another one, Oh please, not another one…_

James opened his mouth and didn't sing but said a whole load of puke-worthy rubbish that made Mr Evans want to snort, looking around however he saw he was the only one sharing these feelings; Lily was blushing red and had tears in her eyes, Mrs Potter was holding a handkerchief to her face, Mr Potter was beaming proudly and all the Marauders were smiling in encouragement to their friend. _They were mad, the lot of them!_

Mr Evans opened his mouth, if only he could interrupt…say something, James Potter's proposal could be halted…for years… but…

"So Lily, will you please, please marry me?" James Potter eyes were earnest, pleading, _full of love_…

_No, no, no, no, no, NO!_

"_Yes"_ Lily finally said pulling James up into a kiss. The rest of the kitchen broke out into applause but Mr Evans felt the need to bang his head on the table. Repeatedly. Finally breaking away, James turned to Mr Evans; "I told you I'd make an honest woman of her" he beamed and then Mr Evans remembered; it had been right before they had left to go back to Hogwarts, in his joy and drunkenness Mr Evans had shouted; _"You better make an honest woman of her, Potter"_ and of, bloody, course James had replied with a loud; "_I PROMISE!" _

He shook his head at his own stupid-ness before he looked at the happy couple. At the ring James was now carefully putting on Lily and a quite suddenly a series of horrifying images flooded through his mind; another lesson on the difference between beige and white, visiting florist after florist, finding venues, the dress, a cake, a dwindling bank balance and then…the worst image of them all, walking down the aisle with not one but _two daughters_.

He gulped… he needed a drink, a big one because by the looks of it, he John Evans was in for the worst year of his life…

**A/N: So there it is! The epilogue and now this story is officially finished, I can't believe I started this in December! To be honest I only thought this was going to be three chapters but now, somehow it's ten! Thank you to every single person who put this on their favourites or alerts, and of course thank you to every person that reviewed and especially those who reviewed more than once, you all motivated me and are absolutely amazing :D **

**I've thought about doing a sequel with the wedding, but I'm not sure yet; if I do it won't be for a while yet, I have some other one-shots I want to do first. **

**Anyway, hope everyone had a great Jubilee weekend :D**


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